Click here to listen to Bieber’s “What Do You Mean”

“Tick-tock-tick-tock.” In an attempt to follow up to his borderline “I’m Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman” LP Believe,  Justin Bieber delivers a mature sound on his new single “What Do You Mean,” akin to his recent underground-indie-EDM sleeper hit and Jack Ü (Diplo and Skrillex) collaboration “Where Are Ü Now.”

Starting off with a bare-bones production (just a metronome and piano), Bieber and producer Skrillex introduce electronic flourishes and a stripped back approach not heard like this since The XX‘s “Islands” (Read my review of their hit “Crystalised” here). It’s the simplicity that allows the listener to focus on the meaning and lyrics of the song instead of getting lost in the melody itself, as is the case usually with Bieber’s production-heavy back catalogue (see hits like “Beauty And The Beat” featuring Nicki Minaj or “Somebody To Love” with Bieber’s protégé Usher).

Speaking of Usher, the funniest part about all of this is how much the melody in “What Do You Mean” itself sounds eerily similar to Usher’s “I Don’t Mind” featuring Juicy J). Obviously both differ in lyrical content, as Usher’s has more to do with him supporting his lover’s desire to continue pursuing exotic dancing and Bieber’s has more to do with him trying to make sense of someone saying one thing but meaning something totally different.

Overall, the song itself fits in well with the mellow R&B-trap musings permeating through the Hot 100 (see The Weeknd‘s “Can’t Feel My Face” and Lana Del Rey‘s “High On The Beach“) and should prove a solid comeback hit for the Biebs. I mean, it’s no “Good For You,” but it’s still a great song. With his new sound and recent PR good will “proving” his maturity, it will be interesting to see how things shape up for him this album campaign!

——

GRADE: ★★★½☆

“You better call Becky with the good hair” – Beyoncé is WOKE

Beyoncé broke her silence this past weekend with what could only be construed as a “call to arms” to all people everywhere who have been scorned by a lover or someone they trusted. While much of the general public focuses on trying to figure out with whom JAY Z was stupid enough to cheat on Queen Bey (Rachel ROY, not Rachael Ray), I think Beyoncé’s message here is much bigger than the sensational gossip takeaways.

In some way or another, we have all seen/met/maybe even been a “Becky with good hair.” In the case of pushing the media narrative (and as an ode to her own culture), Beyoncé references Becky with the good hair to refer to an other. A person who doesn’t possess that elusive Black girl magic. In other words, Becky is supposed to refer to someone who is not considered black (At least from my limited knowledge on the subject – friends and readers, please enlighten me if this is not the case).

The last time I heard a Becky referred to in the media was when someone insisted Taylor Swift was Becky. And then TSwift made a shirt out of it. I’m pretty sure this is how “Becky” as a colloquial term became a mainstream term used by the majority of people.

On the surface, Queen Bey was calling out that other girl, the “side hoe,” the girl who embodies something so different from her. Fans and media were quick to point the finger at Rachel Roy, a fashion designer who had also been credited as the reason that Roc-A-Fella has faltered in recent years. She had been linked to JAY for a while, and was also the reason Solange had her now-infamous elevator altercation with JAY Z at the Met Gala. But that is old news. Literally reports regarding Roy and JAY have been around since all that “shit went down in the elevator.”

Solange going HAM on JAY because he had supposedly taken Rachel Roy to a more private, secluded area during the Met Gala back in 2014.

Compared to her last album/event, Lemonade seems to have a golden thread that pushes it forward. While BEYONCÉ as a visual album was groundbreaking and visually stunning, it could easily be dismantled and consumed in parts. It was literally a collection of videos and music that were linked through artistic feats somewhat-related to the album narrative itself. Another thing: BEYONCÉ plays like the beginnings of a happy marriage. There is innocence to the love Bey croons about. This is in direct contrast to the more mature sound Bey envelops this go-around. Here, she appears WOKE in every sense of the word. She’s awoken to see the issues that she and countless others face. She pushes these issues through using the cheating narrative to which she knows all would relate. 

This album and film focus on not only her struggles, but the struggles of both her mother and grandmother. And that is what makes it amazing. She takes an oppressed minority and writes of their experiences. Whether it be domestic abuse, cheating scandals, relentless murder of family members by authority figures, or just the general stress associated with growing up black and a woman, Queen Bey sings about it all. 

Queen Bey delivers much more than promised and effectively quenches our collective thirst.

Lemonade takes those connections – the framing, the colors, the sensuality, the visual storytelling – and harnesses them, focusing on the issues that affect her target audience. Make no mistake: Lemonade was not made for me. It wasn’t made for my roommate (white heterosexual male). It was made to celebrate to celebrate blackness, womanhood, and intersecting minority culture. It was a spectacle of life in the South post-Jim Crow, Reconstruction Period, and Civil Rights Movements. This is an age where Stop and Frisk laws exist, where, as notable collaborator Kendrick Lamar lamented previously, a white terrorist can be captured without getting harmed and even gets the privilege of getting fed because he was hungry.

I was pleasantly surprised that Louisiana (New Orleans specifically) was her canvas here. We have a rich history of melding together various cultures to create our own little spin on things. Stuff like a marching band strutting down the street, seeing the street signs themselves, the plantation homes, even the people immortalized on-screen… All of this made me feel a deeper connection with Bey and Lemonade.

The juxtaposition of having cultural artifacts that celebrate our racial history with the people who were oppressed by that same cultural attitude is moving in more ways than one. 

Structured as the stages of grieving in an almost French New Wave-risqué style – the sequence title cards were reminiscent of Agnes Varda‘s masterpiece Cléo de 5 à 7 – Beyoncé paints a picture of the struggles associated with an unhappy marriage. Her costars are women. All appearing strong, empowered, and ready to break the molds placed around them by society. The men in the film are silent. With the exception of her father. It’s almost as if Beyoncé is using this project to say to men in general that yes, you can try to take my magic. And I may forgive you. But I will make you pay. I will mess you up so bad with my version of “hot sauce.” I will do what I do best: tell my story through my music and film. And I will take you back if you are worthy (I’m guessing JAY is worthy).

“I got hot sauce in my bag, swag.”

We already know what love is complicated. She has explained that time and again on her first five solo albums (and through her time with Destiny’s Child). But she has become even more empowered to take matters into her own hands. Whether it be through utilizing more aggressive language or less polished/radio-friendly sounds, Beyoncé makes it clear that she is not here for the listener. She tells her story on her own terms. She is in control. She called this meeting to get her point across and does not care if you don’t understand it at first.

As pictured here, Lemonade is a celebration of all black women. Light-skinned, dark-skinned, and every shade in-between. And I’m sure some of you noticed that none of them are smiling (I say ironically). Would you if you’ve been oppressed by the dominant culture for so long?

Do I even need to cover the music itself? You can tell this time around that Beyoncé chose to focus on the film instead of the music. I say this because the album works as a soundtrack to the film itself, which is in direct contrast to how BEYONCÉ worked as an album. Overall, had I just listened to the album without watching the visual interpretations, I would have thought that certain songs may not be as strong as some of the others. But, when taken together, as Beyoncé obviously intended, the album-film shatter any and all misconceptions regarding Beyoncé’s talent.

It would be like Beyoncé to just light the patriarchy on fire and walk away. Looking ***FLAWLESS.

Some questions that need to be addressed in understanding pop culture in 2016: between Beyoncé’s Lemonade and Rihanna‘s ANTi (both solid artistic achievements in their own rights), I can’t help but notice this unapologetic tone that these two cultural icons have embraced. Could this be the beginning of a cultural revolution within music? A means of changing pop music and the way it is consumed? Or are they the exceptions to the rules?

If anything is certain after canceling all of my previous Saturday plans and organizing a full-blown viewing party, It’s Beyoncé’s world and we all just live in it.

Watch the trailer below: 

Writing has been my coping method of choice in the past, and this ordeal has brought up so much. Bear with me.

It’s Monday, June 13, 2016. Two days after one of the most deadly recorded mass shootings in the US. The surge of emotions – anxiety, grief, appreciation, confusion, numbness – that I’m currently experiencing course through my head as I reflect upon recent events.

“The world can be a nasty place… Kill ‘Em With Kindness” (“Kill ‘Em With Kindness” by Selena Gomez)

My journey from August 2015 to today has been littered with MANY learning moments. I mean, I AM in graduate school, right? Let’s begin with the basics: a master’s degree of public health from Columbia University requires that I take courses on race, health disparities, treatment of minorities, and a history of public health. It’s essentially how certain diseases have stress- and genetic-related inducers; how socioeconomic factors, environment, and a lack of knowledge contribute to health disparities; and how a history of lapses in ethical standards have been the death of the healthcare system and the trust minorities tend to have in the system itself. In other words, being a minority sucks and the world works against you because of institutionalized racism and stereotypes. In addition, those who live in stressful states of mind or conditions are at higher risks for developing negative health outcomes. Minorities, or anyone who does not fit the status quo or “normal” mold can suffer from a heightened state of stress, ultimately affecting his or her health. Alternatively, people who identify as any race besides white, any gender besides male, any religion besides Christianity, etc. etc. are at higher risks of suffering from stress-related health issues. My time at Columbia has given me a vocabulary and understanding through which I can voice these issues knowledgeably.

“I’ve loved and I’ve lost… I’ll Take Care of you” (“Take Care” Feat. Rihanna by Drake)

While learning more about stress-related health disparities, I also began to understand how intersectionalities in identity can add to or subtract from one’s own perceived stress. And of course how things like social support can really help in alleviating this issue. Alienation is something that can permeate throughout many communities, and it is especially prevalent in communities where diversity is not celebrated. I started to put my own experiences into perspective.

My whole existence has been influenced by my experiences as an Indian/Malaysian Sikh male brought up in the South. It’s a tale as old as time: I never quite fit in, never found solace in my community, etc. etc. It wasn’t until I reached college and saw that life wasn’t as it was portrayed in my prominent Catholic School upbringing. That being different was something to celebrate, not berate tirelessly. Surrounding myself with positive, accepting people and giving those around me the chance to change their views for the better provided me with the support I needed to cope with the various forms of oppression I would feel daily. I made the best of the lemons given to me.

“Let it go and don’t be so scared… Cause this is Devotion” (“Devotion” by Ellie Goulding)

And thinking about this past weekend… I attended DC Pride with my best friend and brother. One of the most resilient guys out there. The guy who just kicked cancer’s butt and is in full remission. At the age of 26. It was supposed to be a weekend of love, lust, drunken debauchery, and pure, unadulterated fun. And it was, until Sunday morning. No sooner had I woken up than I had received phone calls from family members and friends asking if I had heard the news, where my best friend and I were, and if we were safe. That there had been a mass shooting at a LGBT nightclub in Orlando. During Pride. And that 50 people were thought to have died. The attacker had killed these people because they had dared to express themselves. In a place where they felt comfortable doing so. My mom advised that I not attend the Pride Festival later that evening, fearing that there could be another attack. I mean, her concern was quite valid – DC is a prominent city; it’s the capital of the US. And it’s a city with a HUGE LGBT population. Congregating in one area could be a homophobic mass shooter’s wet dream.

“The hard times are golden, cause they lead to better days… We gon’ Be Alright” (“Be Alright” by Ariana Grande)

I understood the concern that flitted through my mother’s voice. It’s hard enough navigating through a society where being brown automatically equates to being racially profiled as a terrorist or not understanding English, but add in going to LGBT events or hanging out at LGBT neighborhoods or clubs and you’re really “asking for it” (I HATE the phrase asking for it – no one ASKS to be stereotyped or oppressed. Except for very few people, who are within their rights to ask for that if they so choose. I’m definitely NOT one of those people). I told her not to worry. I would be with friends, and there would be heavy security in the area. I explained that changing my behavior just because of the actions of another would give weight to that person’s actions; it would legitimize his behavior and show others that communities can be oppressed and intimidated into behaving in a way that that person deems appropriate. She relented, as she usually does with me when she knows I won’t change my mind.

“Everywhere I go, every smile I see, I know you’ll be there, smiling back at me… We’ll be Together Again” (“Together Again” by Janet. Ms. Jackson if you’re nasty)

But, at the end of the day, her points were valid. Instead of just worrying about whether that cute person I met this weekend was interested in getting to know me or get into my pants, I also had to worry about getting profiled at a LGBT event. I would later overhear people say that the Orlando shooter “looked like a terrorist.” But someone could also perceive me as one – what’s the difference in the eyes of an angry mob?

I compartmentalized my fears and chose to instead focus on celebrating Pride with my friends, to celebrate all that we had worked hard for this past year, and to acknowledge the growth both my best friend and I have undergone through our own trials and tribulations. Because, as I told my mother (and sister, and friends), if we change our routines and give these despicable actions any weight, we are acknowledging that these types of actions can change our behaviors. Thankfully, everyone I came into contact with during my Sunday festivities never made me feel like my skin color or appearance made them visibly uncomfortable (except for one sourpuss who gave me a stank eye for smiling at him lol).

“I feel my heart beating, I feel my heart beneath my skin… Oh you make me feel, like I’m alive again.” (“Adventure of a Lifetime” by Coldplay)

I was one of the lucky ones. I was not in Orlando for Pride. I was not at Pulse Nightclub on Saturday night. I was not being gunned down by a man in a homophobic rage. My family and loved ones were able to confirm that I was indeed alive. But this was not the case for all celebrating Pride this weekend. And this is why I can feel the pain, the anguish, the fear, the confusion surrounding this traumatizing event. I can empathize. I’ve been to similar venues, probably danced to similar music, thought similar things, and had similar conversations with fellow patrons. There are 50 lives that just ended abruptly. Fifty people who were probably just hoping to get lucky for the night. Fifty brothers/sisters who are no longer with us.

Empathy can only get us so far. As a community, it is up to all of us to figure out how to contain this public health epidemic. And the public health epidemic to which I am referring is gun violence. Gun violence has claimed too many lives in the US.  This, along with toxic masculinity, minority repression, systemic racism, religionism, and other stressful conditions all contribute to this ever-expanding issue. Without acknowledging that we have a weird dependency upon these weapons that has been highly detrimental to our society, we end up doing a disservice to all who have suffered from this epidemic. Stricter laws, license, insurance, and background checks have all proven to limit the effects of similar epidemics.

“Strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words, Killing Me Softly with his song…” (“Killing Me Softly” cover by The Fugees)

As I prepare for friends to visit me for NYC Pride in the coming weeks, I plan on waving my rainbow flag high and proud. You may take 50 of us out, but there will be more who will come to celebrate and take up our cause.

***FYI the songs used here have all been songs that have been instrumental in helping me create this post. Feeling all the emotions for the victims of this heinous crimes😦 ***

Dear President-Elect Donald J. Trump,

You’ve done the unthinkable. You’ve convinced a little more than half of the country that you’re the right man for the highest office of power in the world. You ran a campaign based on bigotry, xenophobia, victim-blaming, “trumped up” allegations, and loud-mouthing that seemed to instill a realistic honesty about you, though every fact checker in the world would beg to differ. You tapped into a whole population of constituents who felt as though they have been wronged, left behind, and who are looking for something totally different from existing systems they believe have screwed them time and again. These included working-class white families, white males, among others. They were majority members who were sick of catering to the needs of minorities instead of focusing on their needs. They were people left behind after globalization took hold of the US economy and infrastructure. They were people who didn’t know how to adapt and who may or may not have held a grudge against those who were able to understand and manipulate these changes to fit their needs. 

It was a smart move on your campaign’s part. And it is in line with how politics in other global powers have recently played out. That’s great for you. But here’s the thing I hope and pray you will not forget as move forward as the president-elect: you not only preside over those people you manipulated into believing you will make their world much better but also those who you have ridiculed, torn down, and ostracized. Yes, I’m talking about the Mexicans, the Muslims, the refugees, “the Blacks,” LGBT people, disabled people, and the many other vulnerable populations you’ve put down to elevate yourself. These people are still citizens of the greatest country in the world. And it is up to you to fight for them just as much as you will hopefully fight for those to whom you made multiple promises. So here’s a list of some things I hope you keep in mind as you get ready to inhabit DC’s newest Trump Tower the White House. It is by no means exhaustive, but rather a taste of the issues I hope you do champion as President of the United States.

• Basic Human Rights. I’m talking about human rights that apply to all types of minorities: gender, sexual, racial, economic, educational, and religious. Interestingly, many of your supporters fall into multiple categories of this.
  • For a refresher in what I’m talking about, it may be prudent to refer to the UN’s International Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Racial Discrimination, International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, Convention against Torture and Other Cruel, Inhuman or Degrading Treatment or Punishment, and Optional Protocol to the Convention on the Rights of the Child on the sale of children, child prostitution and child pornography. All of these have been signed and ratified by the US, meaning they have to be upheld by all citizens, including the President of the United States.
  • It also may help to refer to the Constitution and Bill of Rights of the United States, particularly the First Amendment (and the freedom of the press), the Fourth and Fifth Amendments (in terms of law enforcement), and the Eighth Amendment. In addition, dust off your copy of the other Amendments, focusing on the Fourteenth Amendment (and how Section 1 applies to all minorities and Section 2 applies to treasonous acts against the welfare of the US), and the Fifteenth, Twenty-Fourth, and Twenty-Sixth Amendments (and voter intimidation/state voting laws). In other words, you’re most probably going to have to change the way you act in public to ensure you uphold these international regulations. And that whole thing about reinstituting water boarding? That won’t fly. Egging Russia to hack into private emails in order to shape political progress? A big no-no in the future. Threatening to sue and bankrupt various publications for writing negative and both proven and unproven untrue things about you because you can? That’s frowned upon. And that whole child prostitute ring you may or may not have been involved with? It’s best to not ever get involved in that again. 
• Providing Reproductive Access and Healthcare for all. This means looking at the merits of the Affordable Care Act, trying to set up better regulations on the state insurance marketplaces (that don’t infringe upon states rights and also work for the consumers). This also means upholding existing court case decisions such as Roe v. Wade and Whole Woman’s Health v. Hellerstedt. Bear in mind, limiting access to abortions and reproductive access does very little to curb the amount of actual abortions that occur – they just limit the amount of SAFE abortion services that citizens can access.
• Championing sexual respect and minority equality (especially gender equality). Here you definitely have your work cut out for you, as the documented actions in your 70 years of existence have shown us all that you generally do not care about this issue… But here you can change your tune and fight to redefine gender roles and societal norms to become more inclusive of equality. By doing so, you will show all citizens that they can all give into the American “pursuit of happiness” ideal.
• Fighting for LGBT Rights. This means ensuring that these minorities are afforded the same protections under the law as other law-abiding citizens. Distancing yourself from Pence’s hard-nosed stances on anti-LGBT legislation can be step one. Banning things like conversion therapy and adding comprehensive sexuality (and sexual health) education would definitely help.
• Remembering that your words actually mean something. Your wife is currently championing an end to online bullying. How about you help her out by not writing half of the things you would normally post.

At the end of the day, you’re about to shoulder a huge responsibility. As one of the most powerful people in the world, your actions dictate how the global economy works. You are now under a microscope. Your actions will be emulated by impressionable minds everywhere. If you believe that people should behave in a respectful manner, then remember to behave that way in public.

I’m done. Good luck. And please don’t make this the norm.

If anything, 2017 could be summed up in a few cliché words: challenging, tiring, and growth-inspiring. Like I USED to do, I want to take some time to appreciate one of the things I enjoyed about this year: the music. Something to note: this list contains many songs that could be characterized as subdued, minimal, and, for lack of a better word, chill. I think as the world raged on around me, I used music as my escape. To bring me back to basics. And to take my mind off of the many “interesting” developments 2017 had to offer. Here is my very own Hot 100 of the year:

Honorable Mentions

• “Take Me” by Aly & AJ

• “Ruin The Friendship” by Demi Lovato

Demi took major steps to diversify her sound and image – and it paid off. Her new album cuts made an impact on my listening tastes this past year, as you’ll see soon enough.

• “What About Us” by P!nk

This song. One of the most powerful ones to be released this year.

P!nk showed us just why we fell in love with her all those years ago. All it took was a simple message about remembering the things that matter.

• “Wild Thoughts” Feat. Rihanna & Bryson Tiller by DJ Khaled

This song will forever remind me of my trip to Provincetown, where my best friend and I heard the song five times in a row while frolicking roaming about on the boardwalk.

Rihanna truly made this song. For all the attitude and sexuality that girl packs, she oozed it all onto this slick track, making this song one of the handful of summer songs that will remain timeless.

• “Pose” (Salva Remix) by Rihanna

• “Moon In Your Mouth” by Goldfrapp

• “Sex With Me” (Salva Remix) by Rihanna

• “Company” by Tinashé

Need I remind you that Tinashé is one of the best dancers in the game currently?

• “OMG” Feat. Quavo (of Migos) by Camila Cabello

Really disappointed that she didn’t release this on the album It’s a solid track that she originally released along with “Havana,” and, well… I’m sure you know which one became the hit.

• “The Cure” (Initial Talk NRS 80s Remix) by Lady GaGa

Who knew this song had the perfect sound for a ’80s workout video? GaGa’s one-off single was a beautiful mid-tempo ballad with a rock edge, but this remix reinvigorated it and allowed me to feature it on my many playlists that defined some of my biggest moments this past year.

Kittu’s Hot 100 of 2017:

98 (tied). “The Weekend” by SZA

SZA came to slay this year.

SZA really has such an amazing year. She promoted her phenomenal debut album, gained even more momentum as an artist to watch, was featured ALL OVER one of my favorite shows of the year (HBO’s Insecure), and collaborated with some amazing artists in their own right. In terms of this song, “Weekend” sees SZA at her best: relegating herself to accept her situation and make the best of it. She may not necessarily like it, but she’s happy enough to be there for the ride. In terms of healthy relationship goals, this song has none, but it’s real. And for that, I commend SZA for lending her voice to this dating epidemic.

98 (tied). “Witness” by Katy Perry

This year, Katy took a chance – she tried to make pop more purposeful. The issue here is that while her intentions were great, she is not the pop star anyone expected to carry this torch. It was a reinvention that was off to a rocky start from the beginning – this is the same icon who had been at the center of various cultural appropriation scandals just a year ago. If there is one thing we can learn from all of this it’s that there are people out there who want to understand how to deal with these issues in a productive manner. And there need to be more legitimate resources out there for people to become “woke” in an appropriate manner. Oh, and in terms of the music, it’s Katy – you know it’s always going to be a solid bop.

98 (tied). “Audition (The Fools Who Dream)” w/ Emma Stone from the La La Land Soundtrack

98 (tied). “Automaton” by Jamiroquai

It was a return to form for Jamiroquai, showing us that this electronic maven still has it in them. The beginning of the song, with its dark electropop leanings, reminds me of the historical seediness of LGBT scenes past. Through its electronic flourishes straight out of the sound effects files of the last Star Trek film, we finally see the Jamiroquai that brought us the feel-good “Virtual Insanity” and others. It’s what they do best: futuristic electropop with a tinge of innocence and happiness sprinkled in.

98 (tied). “Enna Sona“ from the OK Jaanu Soundtrack

The song literally translates to “How could make something so beautiful and precious?” Yes, it’s a cheesy AF love song.

98 (tied). “Mask Off” (Single Mix) Feat. Kendrick Lamar by Future

Future took many risks this year. After releasing two stellar albums back-to-back in the first quarter of the year, he has collaborated with various artists, boosting his profile even more. It’s been interesting to see how his sound has evolved, too. Personally, his albums were a pleasant change from his previous releases. While the album version of this track is gold on its own, Kendrick’s verse on the single mix provides a welcome break from the hypnotic and repetitive lyricism we all have come to appreciate from Future. If you have played both the Kendrick feature and the album versions to death, check out the Marshmello Remix, which breathes new life into an already addictive track.

98 (tied). “I’m The One” Feat. Justin Bieber, Quavo (of Migos), Chance the Rapper, & Lil’ Wayne by DJ Khaled

93 (tied). “Don’t Blame Me” by Taylor Swift

I admit I’m a Taylor fan. As problematic as she is, she produces a great beat and can write the lyrics that describe the inner workings of my soul. Don’t blame me for the number of tracks she has on this list…

93 (tied). “PopLove 5 (Mashup of 2016)” by Robin Skouteris

93 (tied). “Touch” by Little Mix

Little Mix picks up where other UK girl groups (AKA Girls Aloud and The Saturdays) left off in terms of harnessing and celebrating their sexuality.

93 (tied). “PAINKILLR” by Erika Jayne

Yes, this is an oldie – I recently discovered it when I Wikipedia’d Erika after watching an episode of Real Housewives. (Gotta love that free Live TV streaming on Southwest Airlines!) Yes, this is one of the gayest songs I discovered this year, and, of course, it was on repeat throughout my friends and my PRIDE-related activities. With a pulsing and repetitive beat, Erika does what does best: command your attention with glitz and glamor. It’s just such a good time.

93 (tied). “Falling” by Alesso

91 (tied). “Green Light” by Lorde

Lorde is our internal dance track whenever our favorite song comes on.

Good lord, Lorde! You created an even more spectacular album chock-full of seething lyrics to former lovers and the cynicism that would make any millennial turn the volume up. While I didn’t initially jump head-first into this release, I have seen the (green) light. Looking forward to seeing you in concert in March, where the two of us can awkwardly interpretive dance together to your coming-of-age bops.

91 (tied). “Déjà Vu” by Katy Perry

88 (tied). “Help Me Out” w/ Julia Michaels by Maroon 5

This song can go one of two ways: Adam Levine actually being open to becoming more “woke” and educated on social justice issues, OR he just wants someone to come over for a late-night rendezvous. I’m choosing to believe he really wants to be “woke” and wants someone to help him out by explaining the intricacies of various issues, but let’s be real – it’s Maroon 5. This is definitely a late night booty call song.

88 (tied). “Truthfully” by DNCE

88 (tied). “9 (After Coachella)” Feat. MØ & SOPHIE by Cashmere Cat

84 (tied). “Remember I Told You” Feat. Anne-Marie & Mike Posner by Nick Jonas

Nick Jonas in “Remember I Told You,” being the child he will always be in my heart.

84 (tied). “Homemade Dynamite” (Single Mix) Feat. Khalid, Post Malone, & SZA by Lorde

There is something so subdued about Lorde. Her presence commands your attention, not the beat. While the album cut is fire all by itself, it’s this single mix featuring some of the hottest new artists that pushes the song to that final, grand explosion in a way that makes sense. Post Malone is great here, but Khalid and SZA’s contributions are the reason this remix was even commissioned. Their voices and styles compliment Lorde’s aloofness so well – I mean, one could even say that Lorde’s breakout hit “Royals” helped make these sounds more mainstream and contributed to both Khalid and SZA’s own successes this past year. Overall, this release was a pleasant surprise. One that obviously made an impression on my ears this past year.

84 (tied). “Light My Body Up” Feat. Nicki Minaj & Lil’ Wayne by David Guetta

84 (tied). “Friends” w/ Justin Bieber by BloodPop®

83. “Rockabye” (Jack Wins Remix) Feat. Sean Paul & Anne-Marie by Clean Bandit

80 (tied). “Despacito” (Spanglish Single Version) w/ Daddy Yankee & Feat. Justin Bieber by Luis Fonsi

Luis Fonsi in the sensual video for “Despacito,” one of the biggest songs of 2017.

This song was LITERALLY everywhere. It followed me throughout the summer and then infiltrated my Indian adventures (where the songs on repeat were this one, “Closer” by The Chainsmokers and Halsey, and “We Don’t Talk Anymore” by Charlie Puth and Selena Gomez). Luis had a career-defining year, gained major exposure, and even ushered in an influx of Latin hits that infiltrated English-speaking radio. So yes, though this song was the epitome of overexposure, I am happy that it happened if only for the diversity it has promoted in 2017 pop radio (cue “Mi Gente” by J Balvin, Willy William, and Queen Bey).

80 (tied). “Sexy Dirty Love” by Demi Lovato

80 (tied). “Roll With Me” by Charli XCX

78 (tied). “Party Monster” Feat. Lana Del Rey by The Weeknd

78 (tied). “My Boo” (Tom Budin Remix) by Ghost Town DJs

I discovered this remix while out with friends one night and my life was forever changed. While the original is a classic in and of itself, this remix hits even harder, incorporating the most enjoyable parts of the original while providing a much-needed modern update to the bass line.

76 (tied). “3AM (Pull Up)” Feat. MØ by Charli XCX

76 (tied). “Paris” by The Chainsmokers

This song takes me to those carefree days…

This song gave me all the feels. Honestly, I’m not sure what it was about the song itself – it’s as formulaic as all of The Chainsmokers’ music tends to be. I think the beat reminds me of simpler times. Reminiscent of “Midnight City” by M83, I felt transported back to those college days when the only worries I had were studying for an exam, reaching some sort of deadline for a campaign or story I was writing, or where I would celebrate that week’s accomplishments with my friends. Life may have become much more complex since then, but it’s nice to revisit times when nuclear warfare was not an actual possibility.

75. “Radha” from the Jab Harry Met Sejal Soundtrack

71 (tied). “Look What You Made Me Do” by Taylor Swift

The now-iconic video for “Look What You Made Me Do” showed Taylor at her pettiest and telling the world that the sweet, innocent, doe-eyed Taylor of years past is… Dead.

71 (tied). “I Did Something Bad” by Taylor Swift

This is Taylor at her most unapologetic. And while the original is pretty much everything (not just the attitude in the lyrics – it literally encompasses various genres of music, hopping seamlessly amongst them), check out this reimagined version relying solely on a voice, violin, and cello.

71 (tied). “Love To Love” by Jessie Ware

With a voice as angelic as hers, Jessie can truly do no wrong. With her recent LP Glasshouse, Jessie found a way to produce a follow-up to her opus of a sophomore release Tough Love that could stand out from the shadows of its predecessors (both her debut and Tough Love). Her knack for encapsulating the rawness of love in all its splendor is one of the many things I love about her and this album. On songs like “Love,” Jessie relies on simple production and few vocal gymnastics to slow things down and just be honest with her lover. It’s a beautiful song about a beautiful thing. What can I say – I’m a sap for these types of things.

71 (tied). “Boys” by Charli XCX

Here is the immensely-talented Riz Ahmed being adorable in Charli‘s video for “Boys,” which highly sexualized prominent men in the industry in order to create a “female gaze” and subject men to the same trials women usually undergo in msuci video treatments. In other words, #Feminism and cute guys being cute.

Charli has been a staple of my year-end playlists since she burst onto the scene in 2012. With this song, Charli was able to manufacture a “female gaze” based on the ever-present male gaze. She sexualized men in a way that women are subjected to daily. She essentially flipped the script, showed that women can also be sexual beings that can daydream about dreamy Joe Jonas and Riz Ahmed. This sort of empowerment is a theme of her work. While in certain places it may be subtle, this song (and accompanying video) are anything but. And I am definitely thankful for that.

70. “Into You” (’80s Bon Jovi Meets Billie Jean Edit) by Ariana Grande

Is it bad that I still belt out “Into You” when it pops up on my shuffle? Don’t answer that.

69. “Dancing With Our Hands Tied” by Taylor Swift

68. “Sorry Not Sorry” by Demi Lovato

Demi throws the best breakup party ever in “Sorry Not Sorry.”

It was “Cool For The Summer” Pt. 2. #SorryNotSorry was the kiss-off song that we all needed this year. Whether it be a toxic relationship or a toxic president, we were all trying to live our best lives even with these presences in our lives. Demi stepped up to the plate and provided us with the song to get us through these dark times. A song that taps into our pettiness just a little bit and gives us that satisfaction of knowing our lives are just a little sweeter without that negativity anymore.

65 (tied). “So It Goes…” by Taylor Swift

65 (tied). “Satisfied” Feat. Miguel & Queen Latifah by Sia (and the Hamilton Broadway Musical Cast)

This golden trio (Sia, Miguel, and Queen Latifah) teamed up to reimagine the Hamilton classic “Satisfied” – and, trust me, it definitely leaves the listener satisfied.

Who knew Lin-Manuel Miranda was such an amazing writer? (We all did.) But what none of us realized was just how much more epic his work could become when he collaborated with other prominent artists as he did in “The Hamilton Mixtape.” Through this, we, the masses, were blessed with this gem of a collaboration, featuring Sia’s powerhouse vocals, Miguel‘s sexy slyness, and Latifah‘s larger-than-life personality. A song about achieving satisfaction one hopes to gain through eternal love, how responsibility and society have the power to impede us in this pursuit… It spoke to all of us who strive for greatness in all aspects of life, and the compromises we may endure in order to just taste that sweet, sweet victory.

65 (tied). “Hey Ma” (English Verison) w/ J Balvin & Feat. Camila Cabello by Pitbull

It was Camila Cabello’s year. After breaking away from Fifth Harmony, she racked up a bunch of collaborations and began work on what culminated into a stellar debut album. Here she is in the video for “Hey Ma.”

63 (tied). “End Game” Feat. Ed Sheeran & Future by Taylor Swift

63 (tied). “Quit” Feat. Ariana Grande by Cashmere Cat

As if we needed another reminder that everything Cashmere and Ariana collaborate on is gold… These two superstars come together to give us a song that encapsulates the longing for that person you just can’t kick. It’s the longing… that vulnerability… those soaring vocals. It tells the story of love gone wrong and how, regardless of what Ariana tries to do, she just can’t shake that guy off. We have all been there. And it definitely came in handy for some emotional moments this past year. For some of their more upbeat collaborations, look up “Adore” or “Be My Baby.”

60 (tied). “Still Got Time” Feat. PARTYNEXTDOOR by ZAYN

ZAYN is #GOALS (minus the whole drug use thing). Though he didn’t promote this song at all, it was great to hear some new music from this anxiety-ridden and immensely-talented artist.

60 (tied). “On Hold” (Jamie XX Remix) by The XX

When it comes to The XX, excess is never an option. And this is certainly the case with this remix. Relying on simple, hypnotic instrumentation, Jamie transforms this song into the perfect trance-inducing bop, focusing on the emotions felt through the melody and minimalistic lyrics. The feeling itself is very much an in-between, where you’re gearing up for the journey ahead, but you’re waiting for that commitment on the other end. As the original relies on lyrics to paint this picture, Jamie’s remix delivers the same uncertainty using just beats. Interestingly, this song soundtracked my memories of circuit parties with loved ones this past year – it fit perfectly amongst the backdrop of uncertainty in terms of a future without my father, a potential romance with certain “partners,” and a coming into my own as I grew from the various tragedies of this past year. My life was on hold, and this song captured this sentiment seamlessly.

60 (tied). “Midnight” by Jessie Ware

Jessie showed us all why we originally fell in love with her in her Elton John-inspired “Midnight.”

58 (tied). “Slow Hands” by Niall Horan

It was the sexy breakout hit from the least sexy One Directioner. But hey, it definitely made me a fan!

58 (tied). “Know No Better” Feat. Travis Scott, Camila Cabello & Quavo (of Migos) by Major Lazer

I need to learn the dance from this video. Stat.

54 (tied). “Anymore” by Goldfrapp

As the first single from their newest full-length release, “Anymore” marked a return to the dark, S&M-inspired electro music that defined the duo’s second album era. The difference was that it felt a little more classy this time around. With “Anymore,” Goldfrapp didn’t demand our attention – they were unapologetically themselves, allowing us to peer into the hedonistic tendencies that shape their fantasies. This was even more evident through the imagery used in their concert experiences. To say I was glad that they released this album when they did was an understatement – as I dealt with the aftermath of losing my father, I needed something so out of the ordinary to take my mind off of things. Goldfrapp provided that through their music, and for that, I am truly grateful.

54 (tied). “Kissing Strangers” Feat. Nicki Minaj by DNCE

54 (tied). “Daddy Issues” by Demi Lovato

54 (tied). “Feels” Feat. Pharrell Williams, Katy Perry, & Big Sean by Calvin Harris

I find it hilarious that someone thought this song needed ANOTHER boring video. There exist two terrible music videos for this song, now. Thanks, Calvin.

51 (tied). “Meaning Of Life” by Kelly Clarkson

Leave it to Kelly to deliver some of the greatest imagery of what it means to be in love. On “Meaning,” Kelly delivers a fresh take on one of the oldest topics in the book of life: Love. Using a Motown-inspired beat chock-full of horns and soaring vocals, she inspires all of us to never give up on that elusive mistress known as love. Because, at the end of the day, it is the meaning of life.

51 (tied). “Only Forever” by Demi Lovato

There is something so deeply haunting about this track. Whether it’s the multiple chances Demi gives to this love interest or the subdued production, Demi had me feeling all of the feels.

51 (tied). “Cut To The Feeling” by Carly Rae Jepsen

Oh look, it’s just another B-side from her E•MO•TIONS sessions; just another kickass song from an underrated songstress who manages to craft the most timeless and feel-good songs I’ve heard in years. Carly wants to cut to the feeling with her lover. She wants to move past all the rigamarole. And it’s evident in the expediency the listener witnesses throughout the song. Here, she builds and crescendos, taking the listener on a journey of all the feels. And you’re left craving more – more Carly, more B-sides, and more Carly-induced euphoria.

Now… the Top 50

49 (tied). “True Feeling” by Galantis

Galantis doing what it does best: Bringing down the house.

The elation this song draws out of me… Galantis has a knack for creating innocent-sounding jams that capture the essence of positive emotions. As they did with their previous hit “Runaway (U & I),” this duo takes us on a journey of those feelings that culminate in pure, unadulterated love. I know I definitely thought about that night in September (November for me) every time this song played.

49 (tied). “Passionfruit” by Drake

This is Drake at his best – discussing the disintegration of what initially started out as a passionate and intense union that burned out as quickly as it began. Drake may be many things to many people, but his take on heartbreak and the wrong turns in relationships are where he truly excels. There’s a reason the phrase “Don’t Drake and Drive” exists – you WILL end up at your ex’s house, texting them to see if they’re awake #MarvinsRoom. (If you are tired of the original, check out this amazing cover by Paramore.)

48. “The Breakup Song” from the Ae Dil Hai Mushkil Soundtrack

Regardless of the music video or the many different groups of friends I have ever danced with to this song, there is only one person who will ever come to mind when I play this jam: Christina Gokaldas. I will always remember our nights at our hotel bar, dancing up a storm to this song, becoming friends for life. Looking forward to even more memories with Christina and the rest of my #KIP41 BFFs!

46 (tied). “Love So Soft” by Kelly Clarkson

Yes, the original is a masterpiece in itself. But, check out the Cash Cash Remix to change it up and add a thumping bassline to your life.

46 (tied). “Love Incredible” Feat. Camila Cabello by Cashmere Cat

45. “New Rules” by Dua Lipa

This video. So colorful. So dramatic. So extra. And I love it.

Dua Lipa made her mark with her previous string of modest hits like “Blow Your Mind” and “No Lie,” but it was “New Rules” that really showed her prowess for making gorgeous pop songs. In terms of the song itself, it had all the makings of a hit pop song: talking about the struggles of a relationship gone bad, allowing audiences to relate to the singer’s bad choices #BeenThereDoneThat, giving advice on how to properly handle the situation, and packaging it all in under 3:33 seconds. Its repetitive nature doesn’t hurt, either. Neither does that colorful and synchronized music video. At the end of the day, Dua shows is all that she’s going nowhere – she’s got new rules and she’s here to stay.

42 (tied). “Vente Pa’ Ca” Feat. Maluma by Ricky Martin

(Maluma and Ricky Martin) They’re adorable. And their collaboration was EVERYTHING this summer.

42 (tied). “What Lovers Do” Feat. SZA by Maroon 5

42 (tied). “Another Day Of Sun” from the La La Land Soundtrack

38 (tied). “Malibu” by Miley Cyrus

Miley running away from her past (and the communities she essentially exploited to get famous) in order to rebrand as more family-friendly and mature. Eh, at least we got like three decent songs out of this foray.

A song so saccharine, I was surprised to see that it was Miley singing it initially. “Malibu” is the epitome of California dreaming and beach bumming. For an alternate, high-energy substitute, check out the Tiësto Remix.

38 (tied). “Swish Swish” Feat. Nicki Minaj by Katy Perry

38 (tied). “Uh Huh” by Julia Michaels

Julia’s second single release felt like the continuation of the budding relationship she established in her first single (“Issues” – and don’t worry, more on that single later). On “Uh Huh,” Julia goes into descriptive mode, making sense of her electric feelings she has developed for this new love interest – specifically when they’re between the sheets. She isn’t afraid to be up-front about her feelings, emoting about how time without her beau feels like the shakes that addicts feel without their hit. Her emotions are going in for the kill, and she is very much okay with sealing this deal.

38 (tied). “Havana” Feat. Young Thug by Camila Cabello

Camila Cabello is too adorable. And her music is so legit. Expect to see some of her album cuts on next year’s End of the Year List.

36 (tied). “New Year’s Day” by Taylor Swift

With just a piano and her voice, Taylor describes the lasting love that she has found with her new beau, including how she will be there for both the New Year’s Kiss AND the cleanup the next morning. I think what she means here is that it’s  not just the passion she’s here for – she also wants to be there for the good, the bad, and the ugly. She wants the full experience. Because this person she has found is worth it all. It’s a type of love worth aspiring toward.

36 (tied). “Selfish” Feat. Rihanna by Future

34 (tied). “Call It What You Want” by Taylor Swift

34 (tied). “Anywhere” by Rita Ora

What’s not to love here? Rita looks gorgeous and she’s showing off NYC in all its splendor.

I surprised myself at how much I latched onto this song. Rita had already delivered one stellar hit this year with “Your Song” (look further down ) and I honestly thought that would be it from her, but then she came back with the sonically-climbing love anthem that pushes you to heights only achieved through such positive emotions associated with love. I legitimately was ready to take the love of my life my puppy anywhere away with me after my first listen.

31 (tied). “Run Up” Feat. PARTYNEXTDOOR & Nicki Minaj by Major Lazer

31 (tied). “Tu Chale Toh” from the Qarib Qarib Singlle Soundtrack

31 (tied). “Human Touch” by BETTY WHO

Let me start by saying I love BETTY. Having seen her perform live a couple of years ago, I was blown away by the energy she gives to her audiences. And it doesn’t hurt that her music is just underrated and amazing. Now – on “Human Touch,” BETTY explains how sometimes all we need is a little body contact. And sometimes, there’s a person from our past who may know how to push our buttons just right, even if it’s just for a night. It’s a constructive argument in favor of sexual liberation and defining relationships that work for both parties. And it doesn’t hurt that its slinky production and her breathy vocals make it a perfect song for setting the mood. For a more house-driven take on this song, check out the White Panda Remix.

28 (tied). “Déjà Vu” w/ Prince Royce by Shakira

Shakira and Prince Royce tear it up on the dancefloor in this stunning video.

28 (tied). “Roulette” by Katy Perry

A throwback to Katy bops of yesteryear, “Roulette” is the quintessential Katy song of 2017. As much as songs like “Chained To The Rhythm” vied to make a mark in the public consciousness as music with a message, “Roulette” was anything but. With its theatrical production and lyrics about taking a chance and leaving her fate to the gods, Katy served us early ’90s dance realness with a dash of consensual loving. She invites the object of her desires to test limits. The song itself compares the dangers and rush of Russian Roulette to the dangers and rush of Love (and lust, to be honest). This is the song I believe will put Katy back on the map of pop relevancy… if she tones down the childishness (refer to “Hey Hey Hey”) and turns up the sexiness (à la “I Kissed A Girl”).

28 (tied). “Shape Of You” by Ed Sheeran

Yes, the original was EVERYWHERE this year. That’s why the Cosmic Dawn Remix was my savior.

27. “Wolves” w/ Marshmello by Selena Gomez

Like Selena (tries to be in her music), love can be an intense emotion.

It finally happened – Selena collaborated with electronic artists who understood her musical style and used these limitations to produce some of the most defining singles of the year. On “Wolves,” Selena utilizes the chill, subdued sound she has cultivated to express delicate emotions in her signature, subtle way. Using Marshmello’s stellar production, we are guided through the immediacy of her experiences, just trying to reach this potential lover by any means necessary. All in all, it’s one of her best collaborations to date.

26. “Symphony” w/ Zara Larsson by Clean Bandit

From the first stroke of the violin, I can’t help but screech along with the radio.

One of my favorite collaborations of Clean Bandit’s this year, “Symphony” has a way of putting me in a great mood. Its bouncing melody compliments this analogy of love as a complex structure of many working parts, where your loved one and you fit perfectly together to create such beautiful music. It’s almost as if Clean Bandit took a page out of Kelis‘ songbook and rewrote her hit “Acapella” from the other perspective. Where Kelis talks of how her lover has brought her to a place where she no longer feels her life was acapella, Clean Bandit and Zara are on the other side of the spectrum, where love is still fresh and new. Where they’re confident in the love to call their lover out and say that they want to be held tight and not let go, reaching a similar place to Kelis‘. And, at the end of the day, it truly is an amazing use of an actual symphony in a pop song. So, thank you, Clean Bandit, for this gorgeous song.

25. “Disco T*ts” by Tove Lo

And on the other side of the coin, we have Tove Lo’s epic and sedated “Disco T*ts.” Utilizing a repetitive and simple structure, Tove further solidifies her reputation as the resident stoner cool chick. With a slick yet minuscule production, “Disco” transports the listener to the middle of the dancefloor, where all are able to just feel themselves in a judgment-free zone. It’s raw. It’s unapologetic. And it’s ready to go. So let Tove take you on the ride of your life. If you’re looking for a more aggressive version of the song, check out the Oliver Remix.

22 (tied). “There’s Nothing Holdin’ Me Back” by Shawn Mendes

Shawn Mendes had QUITE the breakout, and I’m pretty sure there is nothing holding him back from running to the No. 1 spot with his next single – as long as it is as much of a bop as No. 22 is.

22 (tied). “Me Enamoré” by Shakira

The sad part is that “Chantaje,” one of her most electrifying and trance-inducing releases in years, was ineligible for this list because I put it in my iTunes Library on Oct. 28, 2017. Ugh. But, I mean, the rest of the El Dorado album is also pretty amazing. Including this song about her love for her gorgeous baby daddy Gerard Piqué.

22 (tied). “Teenage Fever” by Drake

Only Drake could take Jennifer Lopez‘s iconic chorus from “If You Had My Love” and transform it into the drunk-text anthem that it became in 2017. Just another example of Drake’s prowess as one of the most successful rappers/R&B singers/pop machines out there.

21. “King Of My Heart” by Taylor Swift

When I first listened to Taylor’s album, I immediately gravitated to this gem of a song – it was as if she utilized the same effective songwriting formula that shaped the favorites “Wildest Dreams” and “Enchanted“. She describes how she was perfectly content by herself and then this person comes along. This person who just happens to change everything. Interestingly, the song doesn’t ever into unhealthy relationship territory, as if Taylor understands that yes, this budding relationship is great, and this person only adds value to me. It’s a sweet song about the beginning sparks in a relationship. The ones that give you those rose-colored glasses, but with a side of wisdom on the pitfalls of modern dating.

19 (tied). “Fetish” Feat. Gucci Mane by Selena Gomez

Selena turns up the sensuality and counters it with a horror-esque bizarre representation of sexuality in its less-portrayed forms.

As was the theme of all of Selena’s releases this year, she gave into the minimalist, low-key sound she capitalized on “Hands To Myself.” “Take it or leave it.” Selena is her most confident here, knowing that she is the fetish (or desire in the case of this song) of her lover. The sensuality is turned to the max as she purrs about getting twisted up like origami and never denying her lover of his appetite. While it definitely misuses the word “fetish,” I’ll forgive her because this hypnotic song is mostly true in my case: I have a “fetish” for Selena’s songs.

19 (tied). “Bon Appétit” Feat. Migos by Katy Perry

Honestly, the video is weird, but the song itself is pretty great. Alas, Katy, this era is just not working out as well as any of us hoped :(.

18. “Your Song” by Rita Ora

Oof. A gorgeous song with just enough sappiness and innocence to qualify as a pop hit, “Song” was the first Rita song that I immediately fell for on first listen. It demands very little in terms of production (as was proven when she and Ed Sheeran sang their acoustic duet of this gem). The song soars through its brilliant storytelling; Rita’s confidence and ownership of her sexuality is the cherry on top that solidified my love for this gorgeous song. And speaking of gorgeous songs…

17. “Gorgeous” by Taylor Swift

“Ocean blue eyes | Look into mine | I feel like I might | sink and drown and die…” – you have no idea how many times I sang that to the last guy I was into. I discovered the song at a pivotal moment – I just came back from India, and I had met the epitome of this song. Literally flabbergasted when I met this person – I literally didn’t even know what to say. But, as is real life, this song just describes the initial crush that can form when one meets someone who could actually be the “King Of (Your) Heart.” It’s that slice of life this song occupies – that crushing moment when you lay eyes upon the gorgeous individual and the situation could not be further from ideal – that’s what this song encompasses. It’s this tongue-in-cheek, defeatist attitude that makes this adorable song work so well.

16. “Slide” Feat. Frank Ocean & Migos by Calvin Harris

“Slide” will ALWAYS remind me of HBO’s Insecure.

“Slide” was more than just a great song – it was Calvin’s way of showing the world that he could diversify his work. That he was more than just a late-night-rave club DJ. This collaboration pushed the boundaries of musical genre, where electronic and R&B could ménage with Funk and still sound as fresh and introspective as everything Frank Ocean touches. Honestly, I’m still surprised at how effortless this collaboration comes across… As if it was always destined to be. Great job all around, people!

14 (tied). “…Ready For It?” by Taylor Swift

Let’s be real. The chorus is fire. The rest of the song grows on you. But I’d listen to it again and again for a chance to hear that chorus and subsequent breakdown. In all of its aggressiveness, the chorus rests like the oasis it truly it is. And am I the only one who thinks this would have been such a better first single to introduce the world to the new sound Taylor was going for in Reputation.?

14 (tied). “It Ain’t Me” w/ Selena Gomez by Kygo

Initially, I was not impressed with this song. I felt like it was a Kygo song that could have been executed by any female singer. While the song may not have been exclusively crafted for Selena, she still managed to hit all the right notes. Her star power (I’m sure) contributed to its overall success. While the lyrics are something I can understand Selena singing, the melody and arrangement was an unexpected surprise. Eventually, the song did grow on me (as a result of the moving video), and it managed to become one of my songs of the summer.

13. “Strangers” Feat. Lauren Jauregui (of Fifth Harmony) by Halsey

When this video does get released, it will be epic. Halsey, drop it, already!

And finally, in 2017, those who identify as bisexual were given an anthem to sum up the dangers of falling for a game-player. An ode to the fuccbois and -gurls of the world. Halsey, who has spoken openly about her own bisexuality on multiple occasions, finally addressed it in her art. Explicitly. And the results were amazing. Both Lauren and Halsey are the poster children for the bisexuality identity, and both play off of each other in what can only be described as exploring the wreckage of a disintegrating relationship (or a two-week dating “thing” as we know it in NYC). It’s as commonplace as one would expect when there are multiple options on every corner. And that’s why a song like this is so important to have in 2017/2018.

12. “Nashe Si Chadh Gayi” from the Befikre Soundtrack

From the first high-pitched ad-lib to the hypnotic and repetitive beat, “Nashe” consumes the listener, getting them drunk off the song. The chorus itself literally translates to”this girl is high AF.” Culturally, high means under the influence of any sort of drug, including alcohol (to which the male protagonist is referring). It is the epitome of summertime soirées and my time celebrating life with my amazing friends in India this past September. And this song crosses cultures, too – my American friends loved to pregame to this one. It just goes to show: when you have a legit beat and melody, good times can translate over, sans subtitles.

Now… The TOP 10 of 2017.

10 (tied). “Now Or Never” by Halsey (played 108 times)

Halsey in her Romeo + Juliet-inspired video for “Now or Never.”

Halsey is one of those artists… I knew she was talented, but I had never taken the time to get to know her work. That all changed when she released “Now or Never.” With eerie similarities to Rihanna‘s “Needed Me,” I immediately fell in love with this single. In classic Halsey fashion, she’s giving her lover an ultimatum. She talks about how she’s done everything to show her love for this person. And now she wants to know if he or she is down. It’s the attitude of not wanting to waste your time – the epitome of my views on dating in NYC. When I’m sure about a guy, I know it deep down. And if they aren’t on board when the situation presents itself, it’s just not in the cards; it’s time to move on. I’m not in the business of pining for potential lovers, waiting for a commitment from another fuccboi. It’s either (now, now, now, now, now, now…) now or never.

10 (tied). “ILY2” by Charli XCX (played 108 times)

Here is Charli XCX, one of the most talented individuals in the game today.

Such a kick-ass production. If there is anyone who continues to really push the boundaries of pop music, it’s Charli. Her Number One Angel album redefined what pop music could sound like. Filled with songs that are just a little bit jumbled, unpolished, and packing all the emotion, Charli taps into this authenticity that tends to be missing from some of the biggest pop releases in 2016/2017. It’s real. And that’s what makes it so enjoyable. Now… in terms of the song: it’s Charli’s ode to her lover. To the one who (probably) “accidentally” let slip that he loves her. And this is her sweet, beautiful reply. Spoiler alert: she loves him, too.

8 (tied). “Stay” w/ Alessia Cara by Zedd (played 118 times)

The video for Zedd’s and Alessia Cara’s “Stay” still brings me to tears.

Alessia is definitely one of the underrated newcomers to the music scene. She’s a consistent hitmaker, tapping into this raw emotion with which listeners can easily connect. Throw in Zedd’s flawless swooshes and production and you have the recipe for a smash. I discovered this song after watching a trailer for the film Everything, Everything. Like the film, the song really hit a nerve on the longing and choices that are associated with love. How willing we are able to give ourselves to another. (And, it’s always worth it – regardless of how the situation plays out, at least you can say with certainty that you gave it everything.) She is nervous about saying goodbye forever to a love that has reached its end. But there’s that intention. Just at the end. To stay. Just a little longer. Because every moment spent with that person you love is precious. And once they leave, the illusion is shattered. And you’ll have to move on.

8 (tied). “Delicate” by Taylor Swift (played 118 times)

Yes, I know the album came out in November… I’m that guy who’s been listening to it on repeat.

“My reputation’s never been worse so | you must like me for me.” Taylor’s strength has always been her songwriting, and she does not disappoint on this album cut from her latest Reputation. She sings of getting to know that special someone all over her favorite places in NYC. About realizing how you’re slowly falling for that someone who just gets you. That makes all your cares melt away. “Delicate” is about that delicate dance that we all do in modern dating and courting. That one where we can’t show exactly how we feel – because doing so makes us lose leverage; it makes us vulnerable to this person we have developed feelings for. But, just as I have done in the past, Taylor bites the bullet. She tells him how she feels. She admits that the situation is delicate, but she’s here to assure the object of her affection that he is special. That he is worthy of her. That she likes him. And, at least for Taylor, her assertiveness works in her favor.

7. “Sleepover” by Hayley Kiyoko (played 125 times)

Hayley Kiyoko is just So. Damn. Talented.

Oof. Hayley sang the song of my soul when I was dealing with unrequited love this past year. Lyrically, Hayley discusses how she wants more from a friendship with a straight girl that she knows will never truly turn into anything. She resolves that at least she can play out the relationship in her head. The song itself deals with the depression many LGBT youth deal with when going through the trials and tribulations of young, unrequited love. When we make terrible decisions and fall for that straight person who emulates all the traits you want in a partner. Who truly gets you but would never reciprocate the romantic feelings you’re developing as you discover who you truly are. Hayley brilliantly captures the essence of this type of love. How it can drive us into unhealthy relationships where we are willing to fulfill the object of our desire and affection in return for nothing. How we are able to give of ourselves so much and expect nothing in return. And while Hayley harps on the pitfalls of realizing you’re in a one-sided, unfulfilling relationship…

6. “Bad Liar” by Selena Gomez (played 126 times)

Selena Gomez plays multiple roles in the “Bad Liar” video, which, if you haven’t seen it yet, you need to immediately watch. Like stop reading now and click the link next to the number 6. (That’s her as me the nerdy high school student.)

Selena sums up the stumbling that can occur when you’re in the presence of that person of your dreams. “Liar” comes across as a song full of disconnected thoughts – and it’s supposed to do just that. It encompasses the wave of frantic speech (AKA word vomit) that can happen when approached by your crush. That guy who puts all the others to shame. The one you have to literally pick your jaw up off the ground for. Trust me – it’s literally the worst. Set to a simple bassline, Selena allows her breathy voice to stretch, fill the gaps, and entertain the listener. It showcases the discombobulation of crushing on someone through its lyrics, which is why this song works so well.

5. “Someone In The Crowd” w/ Emma Stone from the La La Land Soundtrack (played 133 times)

The party sequence picturized in this song is one of my favorite sequences in recent film history.

This song sums up my speech to all my friends RE networking. Jkjk, but really, I fell in love with this song after watching the film. It sums up the emotions we feel as twenty-somethings when contemplating attending an event: the anxiety, the nervousness, the excitement, and (also, in my case) the introspection. How will this event change me? Will this person I meet be worthy of my time? Will I be of theirs? Will this person help make my life easier in any way – personally, professionally, emotionally? It’s the delicate dance of wanting to appear mysterious to pique a stranger’s interest but not too aloof to drive them away. Of course, my favorite part is the bridge (literally why I played this song so many times), when Emma Stone’s character glides through a slowed-down reality. Where she tries to make sense of who she is in the chaos that is her world. It’s a relatable scene for any person still trying to gather their bearings and make sense of their place. How they will contribute to society. Where they fit within the hierarchy. It’s a person on the precipice of discovery. And it’s where I feel many of my friends and I currently are.

4. “I Feel It Coming” Feat. Daft Punk by The Weeknd (played 144 times)

The Weeknd in his apocolyptic video for “I Feel It Coming.”

Leave it to Abel to slay my life with this gorgeous electro-R&B collaboration. While the song does have the double entendre of passionate and consensual sex, the deeper meaning here is one of The Weeknd wanting to commit to this person he has developed feelings for. It’s a departure from his previous tales on relationships and trysts with women – he’s willing to stay and create something with this woman. And it makes sense – he’s feeling just as good about love and this woman as he and Daft Punk convey through the immaculate, albeit mushy, production.

3. “Issues” by Julia Michaels (played 161 times)

Julia Michaels: a name you need to know in terms of future pop music players.

I remember the first time I heard this precious song – I immediately texted my niece and said this was the song Selena should have released as her first single for her new era. It was the perfect underrated production, with lyrics of a chaotic and unhealthy relationship on the verge of breaking. It’s that last chance. That final stand to see if the other person is willing to work with you to rebuild what has broken. To actually communicate about the issues. In a way, I’m glad Julia saved this song for herself – while the song would have been perfect for Selena, the raw emotion and hesitation in Julia’s voice is exactly what transforms this song from ordinary to GRAMMY-worthy. It’s subtlety and self-deprecative nature showcase the emotions that we may display when our partner blames or lashes out at us. The problem lies not with our actions, but rather in our partner and how he or she reacts to situations. Julia is willing to step in to help her partner come to terms with his failures and shortcomings so that he may be able to share in her successes. So that he understands that she will be there regardless of his own success. She loves him as he is.

2. “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)” w/ Taylor Swift by ZAYN (played 167 times)

Oof. I don’t know which I like better: ZAYN‘s voice or his swag. Things like this are what solidify my love (let’s be honest – it’s lust probably) for him.

When ZAYN’s angelic voice filled my headphones on that first listen, I knew this was going to be a hit. Reflecting on the ashes of a passionate relationship, ZAYN and Taylor recount the passion that they can’t live without anymore. They literally would rather die than spend another moment without their lost lover. Interestingly, both play opposites in the break-up, singing from person A and person B’s perspectives. Both are devastatingly heartbroken, but neither wants to make the first move. Instead, they are content enough with living in their anguish. Obviously, the song’s production matches the lyrics and tone of the 50 Shades trilogy: subdued, dark, and erotic. It’s where the pain (of heartbreak) and the pleasure (of their memories of the former lover) meet. And it doesn’t hurt that it features two of my favorite singers.

And from these two superstars to the queen of my charts…

Drum Roll Please…

1. “Slumber Party” (Single Version) Feat. Tinashé by Britney Spears (played 180 times)

I mean, honestly… What did you expect? It’s Britney, bitch.

Britney brought back the subtle sexuality she’s known for, got herself into the best shape she’s been in years, and shot what could essentially be seen as an extended cut of the 2003 “Boys” (The Co-Ed Remix) video. Britney pulls out all the stops here, explaining to her beau that they will indeed spend the whole night awake, like a slumber party. As we already know, Britney is the queen of sexual innuendo, and she paints one hell of a picture through her lyrics. It doesn’t hurt that she invites one of her many protégés Tinashé to follow suit on the second set of verses. In terms of this song compared to the rest of her releases… yes, it’s not Britney’s strongest single. Nor was it her strongest song on the Glory album (which is EPIC, by the way). But, it’s subtlety and playful lyrics are classic Britney and a reminder that she is still (mostly) relevant. Hopefully, her dabbling into this softer, intimate pop will push her team to explore new sounds and help Britney redefine the genre altogether.

And here’s the countdown playlist via YouTube:

This list was compiled based on strict play count criteria. All songs present had to be added to my iTunes Library between November 1, 2016 – December 31, 2017. The order of the songs was based solely on play count. Overall, this list is not representative of the biggest moments in music, nor is it a list of critically-acclaimed singles released this past year. It is literally a compilation of the songs of which I couldn’t get enough.

(To follow along musically, click play on this YouTube Playlist and start reading along)

Love. It’s this complicated emotion that truly makes the world go round. It’s what wars are fought over. It’s what gets some people up in the morning and keeps others awake at night. And it’s what makes life just that much sweeter.

“I’m sorry that I missed your party | I wish I had a better excuse like | ‘I had to trash the hotel lobby’ | But I was busy thinking ’bout boys”

– Charli XCX, “Boys“

And then there’s lust. The opposite of sorts. It’s about the animalistic, magnetic connection. The desire to just fulfill every deep desire within. The difference between love and list for me hinges on personality. Where there is a mutual desire to fulfill one another, to better the other, and to actually care for the other so deeply. Love tends to fulfill these desires, while lust only gives the appearance of their presence.

“And I could try to run, but it would be useless | You’re to blame | Just one hit of you, I knew I’ll never be the same”

– Camila Cabello, “Never Be The Same“

Accounting for my own experiences in love and lust isn’t hard… I have a pattern when it comes to this elusive emotion. Let’s just say that I’m a hopeless romantic until I get crossed – then, all bets are off. Funnily enough, I think I’ve only been truly in love – you know, that all-encompassing, sweeping you off your feet, making you truly want to focus on that person and his or her betterment – a few times, and let’s just say that it wasn’t as reciprocated as one would hope (in that my feelings were never reciprocated. At all. ). I know what you’re thinking – why would someone “so smart” continually make the same mistakes in love? What can I say? I fall hard and love harder. And doing things passionately has been a theme in my life ever since I was born.

Reminiscing about my missed opportunities recent romantic mishaps, I realize that I’m actually lucky. Lucky to have fallen in various forms of love. Feeling various levels of passion. And living truly and freely in a way that I would never regret. Thinking back on the loves of 2017, whether it be a closeted doctor, successful entrepreneur, or a guy with all the potential in the world, there was one golden thread that ropes them all together: each of them served a purpose in my own growth and development.

“Long night, with your hands up in my hair | Echoes of your footsteps on the stairs | Stay here, honey, I don’t wanna share | ‘Cause I like you”

– Taylor Swift, “Delicate“

Take the closeted doctor: he helped me appreciate my freedom in unapologetically being myself. Of showing me that I was worthy of the love I bestowed upon him. That I, too, deserve happiness, even when going through familial hardships. He showed me the importance of demanding high standards. The importance of reciprocated love. And of pursuing people who will fulfill me in all aspects of life, not just someone who fits in the box of what my mother (and father at the time) would have deemed successful. The crux of the matter here relied on closeted doctor not being as straight-forward with his intentions. Eventually, I confronted him about what he was trying to gain from our relationship, and both of us were honest about our expectations. And it sucked. Yes, he took a month for me to get over, but, in the end, it was worth it – I got a pretty great friend out of the mix.

After the doctor, I told myself I was just going to focus on myself. I was being selfish and dating the entrepreneur: someone was the perfect blend of old school, introversion, self-fulfilling, and sexiness. He treated me well enough, communicating at least once a day, meeting up for weekly dates, and indulging in activities in which I wanted to partake. At that time, it was exactly what I needed. Our connection was quaint but it fulfilled us both perfectly – I wasn’t able to throw myself into a full-fledged relationship because I was still reeling from my father’s recent death and the entrepreneur had commitment issues. He had dealt with similar familial issues when he was my age, and when he was engaged in our relationship, he provided a level head to make sense of the many emotions I was feeling. He provided just enough attention to keep me interested and focused only on him (instead of having my usual stable of potential suitors). And then, the inevitable happened. I caught feelings. I started to look forward to our dates. I imagined him coming to dinner with my friends and me. Of us vacationing to exotic destinations, where he would indulge in his photography interests and we would just explore the unknown. Together. I was starting to build a life in my head with this person, and I liked it.

“No fear but I think I’m falling | I’m not proud | But I’m usually the type of [boy] that would hit and run”

– Rita Ora, “Your Song“

So, after nine weeks of dating exclusively, I asked the entrepreneur if we could put a label on it. The outcome: devastation. According to the entrepreneur, my financial situation made him commitment-phobic. He saw our differences in finances as a hindrance and a potential source of conflict. And that was that.

I learned a ton from the entrepreneur: everyone has different dealbreakers, one can find solace in even the darkest of places, and just because someone doesn’t have all of their ducks in a row doesn’t mean they aren’t worthy of your attention. Though the relationship was fun while it lasted, the getting over process was anything but grueling – it was even more delightful. I was finally single, feeling gorgeous, and about to celebrate life in all its splendor with my best friends and accompanied by sun, tribal beats, and just a little bit of liquid courage.

“My love, he makes me feel like nobody else… | But my love, he doesn’t love me | So I tell myself, I tell myself… | I’ve got new rules, I count ’em”

– Dua Lipa, “New Rules“

It only took a couple of weeks to shake those feelings of love off, but I remained protective of my heart after the entrepreneur. I dated, yes, but I was much more selective with whom I spent my time. I was going through a ton and didn’t want to open myself up to even more emotional burden while dealing with the ebbs and flows of grieving after the death of my father. It wasn’t until after I came back from India – after I fell in love with myself, my history, my uniqueness, my imperfections, my passion, my caring, my everything – that I found my great love of 2017. And it wasn’t something that was cultivated through continued exposure – it was dynamic. Explosive. Flittering. Flabbergasting. Cinematic. It was everything.

Cue the guy with all the potential. Interestingly, this person was as far away from my usual type as one could be. Whereas facial hair, darker features, and a slight tinge of arrogance usually prevail, I found myself crushing on a pale, goober-like sweetheart with a patchy beard. This guy was handsome (aren’t they always), talented (boy was he talented), and his disposition left me feeling like a better person. He was like the sun – giving me so much warmth and peace of mind. And, like Icarus, I tried to get as close to it as I possibly could. I still remember our first exchange – I was actually nervous. I couldn’t string words together to save my life. But he smiled that giant smile and made me feel like everything was going to be alright.

“Ohh, tryna play it coy | Tryna make it disappear | But just like the battle of Troy | There’s nothing subtle here | In my room there’s a king size space | Bigger than it used to be | If you want you can rent that place | Call me an amenity”

– Selena Gomez, “Bad Liar“

And from that moment, life changed. When we were together, colors were more vivid. Those love songs actually made sense. I was dancing around the house again. Smiling more often. Laughing uncontrollably. Finishing projects. Becoming more confident in myself and my abilities. I was finding myself again.

They say life is circumstantial. It’s what you make of it. Let’s just say that my September global health tour in India had served as a primer for the transformation I would undergo over the next couple of months. Between the establishment of my identity in my own roots and this fruitful new friendship with this gem of a man, I felt untouchable. Like I could conquer my wildest dreams. Like I could change the world for the better. This person was the catalyst who believed in my potential. He saw things about me that I had lost over the years. He made me want to be a better person. He challenged me. To fulfill all of my potential. To reach those pinnacles of success. To be ambitious again. He helped me realize where I was and that I could actually fulfill my purpose in life. It was one of those transformative loves, different in its depth and power than any previous love could have been.

“Every look, every touch | Makes me wanna give you my heart | I’d be crushin’ on you, baby | Stay the way you are | ‘Cause I never knew | You could hold moonlight in your hands | ‘Til the night I held you”

– Ariana Grande, “Moonlight“

Honestly, I didn’t realize how far down the rabbit hole I had gone until it was too late – the feelings were there and they had snuck up on me. And now, they were starting to bubble over. Our interactions harbored much more for me than they did for said person. To me, we were building the foundation of a something more substantial than any regular friendship. As we progressed in our friendship, I never wanted to dwell on our different intentions because, at the end of the day, I was feeling fulfilled in ways that I hadn’t even expected could happen. I felt so confident because this person was in my corner. Cheering me on. Supporting me in all my endeavors. Pushing me to accomplish my goals and dream big again. It was the first time in a while I felt truly happy. And it was because of this person’s presence in my life.

But not everything was fine and dandy… as this person only sought a friendship from me, there were hopeful expectations that were just not being fulfilled. Exploration of other types of intimacy. Of a deeper romantic connection. One that would put the others I had felt to shame. Because I could feel how amazing our emotional connection already was – even in our short time as friends, our connection rivaled that of my own best friends’ with me. This person had established themselves as an integral part of my life. I would do anything and everything for this person as a result.

“I see it in the way that you behave around me | And I can’t tell | What we have is different from anyone else | Cause you stop doing what you’re doing | When I call you come to me running | And I would do the same for you | So tell me that you feel it too”

– Yuna Feat. Usher, “Crush“

I would genuinely look forward to hanging out with him, helping him in any way I could, and making his life just a little easier. It was that kind of love. The type that makes you suspend your own well-being for the other. The type that motivates you to be the best version of yourself so that you can be the best version for him. Oof. It was so sweet. And so fulfilling. And, as I’m sure you can guess, so tragic when it ended (spoiler alert: I’m still single lol).

As Usher said long ago, “U Got It Bad”. It was so true. My best friend(s) knew something was up – they had seen that I was spending an extended amount of time with this person. They observed how my whole demeanor changed when this person was in our midsts. I knew that I would ultimately get hurt, and this house of cards I had built would come crashing down at any second. As the holidays approached, I knew that I could no longer be satiated with just a friendship. In my mind, I knew that the friendship provided me with a type of high I had never felt before. I couldn’t even imagine the peaks of happiness I would feel if I added intimacy and romantic love to the mix. My friends could only see it going downhill from here as my feelings for this person would only deepen.

“When you feel it in your body | You found somebody who makes you change your ways | Like hanging with your crew | Said you act like you’re ready | But you don’t really know | And everything in your past, you wanna let it go”

– Usher, “U Got It Bad“

My friends, bless their hearts, implored me to ghost this person. I was distraught. Ghosting was, in my opinion, the coward’s way out. You relegate yourself to a life of regret and you remain dishonest to the one person you’d never want to ever hurt. As my two closest friends continued to tell me how ghosting would be the best solution, I began to disconnect. How could I, the champion of consent and honesty, not let someone know how amazing a person they are to me? How could I give up without having confronted the situation?

Confronting the situation… and that was how I knew what I was going to do. After a sullen train ride home, I broke my silence, suggesting that I just tell this person what was going on. Obviously the sparknotes version of the situation. At the end of the day, I wanted to test the waters and see if there could be any legitimacy to the feelings that coursed through my veins. Both of my best friends were taken aback – it hadn’t crossed their minds that someone would just confront how they approached love.

“I don’t know if you feel the same as I do | But we could be together, if you wanted to | (Do I wanna know?) | If this feeling flows both ways… | (Baby we both know) | That the nights were mainly made for saying | things that you can’t say tomorrow day”

– Arctic Monkeys, “Do I Wanna Know?“

I had the discussion. I asked the hard-hitting questions I was dying to get answered. It was right before the holidays. I kept telling myself that these feelings I felt for Boy with all the potential were one-sided, but a part of me felt like I may have been wrong. That there could be a chance he thought of me in a similar manner. That I fulfill him just as he had fulfilled me for so many months. Wishful thinking, I was certain, but I wouldn’t know for sure unless I confronted the situation. So what did I, the guy who has no cares about confronting issues head-on, exploring the discomfort, and learning from the raw emotion that is someone in his or her most vulnerable position, do? I looked him in his ocean-blue eyes and just asked him if he wanted to explore with me these feelings I had recently developed. Of course, I didn’t dare call it love – I didn’t want to divulge more information than I needed and risk scaring him away.

And I will never forget his response. He thanked me for sharing and then told me that he never saw nor would he ever see me in that manner. I was devastated and felt the sting of rejection and failure. And it sucked. He told me that he was proud of me for being so vulnerable and honest with him. And then asked me what he could do to help me with how I’m feeling. Emphasizing how he didn’t want me to leave his life and how he was sorry for causing me such pain. It was one of the most mature manners in which I had seen someone handle a situation of this nature. I told him I would reach out when I had moved on, come to some sort of peace regarding the situation itself, and could be the great friend I had been to him these past few months.

“I’m not the type of [boy] for you | And I’m not going to pretend… | And I break all the rules for you | Break my heart and start again | I’m not the type of [boy] you call more than a friend”

– Carly Rae Jepsen, “Your Type“

The results: not what I had hoped, but with it came clarity. Clarity of understanding that I am worth more than a unilateral love. That the feelings I have for someone else should be reflected back upon me. That friendships can become deeply meaningful and be just that. That someone else’s opinion of me doesn’t define who I am. That kindness comes in many forms. That some friendships are worth salvaging, especially when the people in them are inherently good people. And that I deserve the best. Because honey I’m worth it.

At the end of the day, these feelings could never be reciprocated – it was all in my head. The “signs” I had seen – they didn’t exist. As my friends and I discussed the aftermath, one brought up an interesting point. As honors students, we have been programmed to understand that things that are worth it require hard work and determination. This makes them worthy of us. And the payoff at the end of a long and tumultuous journey is supposed to be everything. In this sense, the harder or more impossible a Love seems, the more it can entice us. Because, to us, having to work hard to attain results makes it worthy of us. But, while that tends to be the case for life events, careers, and learning, does have to be a mainstay or necessity of love? I think the problem that many of us run into is that we can be attracted to the impossibilities. We like the challenge. The desire to change someone’s perspective. To convince them that you’re the one. But, in love, are we supposed to try to convince them of this? Or is it something that should just happen by itself? This dichotomy is what makes me apprehensive regarding all things love, but, I’m sure my adventures in the future will help shed some light.

“We both need fixing | But they can’t fix what’s true… | And I still remember that night in [November] | Ooh, it’s a true feeling”

– Galantis, “True Feeling“

During my “grieving period”, I analyzed and evaluated everything: every interaction, impulse, thought. I realized that boy with all the potential was right in his assessment of us… we weren’t necessarily romantically compatible. My head had been so clouded by the intense emotional connection that I forgot to consider the other factors that fed into a strong, healthy, and fulfilling romantic relationship. I realized in my hyper-analysis of everything related to this guy with all the potential that he understood me more than I had at that moment. That what I was feeling was just the love for a best friend, albeit one who was such a quick find. As a result of the speed in which we connected, I hadn’t had a chance to fully understand and explore the limits of our relationship. Of our friendship. Of where my actual feelings ended and the romantic in me started to build a narrative that I didn’t necessarily want. It was during this purge of everything related to the boy with all the potential that I was able to reconcile these strong emotions related to great friendship with my own grief and loneliness. I realized how these were separate things and that this boy with all the potential truly had the potential to fulfill me in terms of being a great friend, but he wouldn’t be able to scratch the surface when it came to fulfilling me in a romantic sense. And with that clarity came the ability to reach out and accept this amazing person for what he was: a great guy who will be an amazing and close friend. And just that.

I’m not going to lie – this aftermath of the revelation had been tough. The second-guessing oneself. The “what could I have done differently”… all of it. But even as I reflected on what actually happened, I don’t think there is one part I would have done differently. The hardest part was reckoning with maintaining a healthy friendship free of any lust. Or hope of changed opinions. I had to truly accept this friend for who he is. For what he wants romantically (not me ). And I am happy to report that I have accomplished this lofty goal.

“Ten months older, I won’t give in | Now that I’m clean, I’m never gonna risk it | The drought was the very worst… | The rain came pouring down | When I was drowning, that’s when I could finally breathe | And by morning, gone was any trace of you | I think I am finally clean”

– Taylor Swift, “Clean“

At the end of the day, I now have a clearer idea of what I deserve for a lifetime of happiness. I now have a measuring stick for which I will measure all future potential beaus. Because I want someone who can inspire greatness in me the way this person has. I know what life is like with a friendship of this caliber – and I can only imagine what it would be like with a love so sweet.

Okay, readers. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that I love Taylor Swift’s music. While she may be a problematic white female who calculates every move, weighing her self-interest over the greater good, the woman is an amazing lyricist. This is especially evident in her recent image reinvention, where she embodies the femme fatale in all its glory. She carried out this hyper-sexualized, no-cares-to-give attitude throughout her promotional material (see EXHIBIT A – “Look What You Made Me Do” video, EXHIBIT B – “Ready For It” video, and EXHIBIT C – “End Game” video).

EXHIBITS A, B, and C showcasing a more jaded, mature, and adulting Taylor Swift.

So imagine my surprise when we, the general public, received the atrocity known as the first “Delicate” video. What amounted to a pile of childishness and Swift attempting to sharpen her dancing skills was lost on not only me, but on much of her fanbase – the clip has managed to rack up 78 million views in two weeks, which for any other artist would be a feat within itself, but we are talking the Country-Pop princess Ms. Swift. I believe that she and her team realized this misstep almost immediately as they are planning to release a new version of the video tonight. And I don’t blame them – take a look at the weirdness that is Swift’s first attempt to promote “Delicate” below:

This “reimagining” by Swift and Joseph Khan is anything but satisfactory. And for a song that is one of the highlights on an impressive pop record, I know they are both hoping this second version will appease fans and casual listeners alike.

Now, this brings us to why I’m writing this. As soon as I saw the nightmare that is the first attempt release, I immediately started creating my own version of the music video. And… here it is RELATIVELY FORMATTED (so don’t be too critical of the product).

Now, I have NEVER published a screenplay or shown but a handful of people my screenwriting capabilities, but I feel compelled to share what I envisioned here with all of you, if only to help others understand what I see when I listen to this gorgeous, understated song.

EXT. OUTDOOR ROOFTOP BAR

TAYLOR SWIFT

This ain’t for the best
My reputation’s never been worse, so
You must like me for me (me for me)

Mood Lighting and Couples canoodling. GUY 1, a trimmed, smart-looking guy with a case of the Mondays, sits at the Bar. BARTENDER sets an OLD FASHIONED in front of G1. G1 turns to the entrance of the Rooftop to see GUY 2, the goofy guy with Prince Charming looks who doesn’t realize it, walk in. G1’s gaze follows G2 as he settles in at the bar caddy-corner to G1.

TAYLOR SWIFT

We can’t make
Any promises now, can we, babe?
But you can make me a drink

G1 perks up. G2 looks over, and G1 catches his eye. G2 does a subtle double take and smiles. G1 smiles back, signals to the Bartender to pour G2 a drink. G2 raises his GLASS to signal a cheers G1, takes a sip, and gets up from his seat. G2 starts toward G1, and as he reaches G1…

PAN UP TO A SKY FULL OF STARS.

CUT TO:

EXT. NARROW WEST VILLAGE STREET

PAN DOWN TO FACE THE MIDDLE OF A WEST VILLAGE STREET.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Dive bar on the East Side, where you at?
Phone lights up my nightstand in the black
Come here, you can meet me in the back

ESTABLISHING SHOT: SHOPS, RESTAURANTS, and FEW RANDOM PARKED CARS line the street.

STREET LIGHTS illuminate more than just the cozy West Village Street. G1 and G2 stroll down the middle of this now-dead road. G1 and G2 saunter down the street holding hands.

CLOSE UP on G1 and G2 holding hands.

PAN OUT TO CAPTURE THEM IN THE STREET.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Dark jeans and your Nikes, look at you
Oh damn, never seen that color blue
Just think of the fun things we could do

Both walk G1 lets go of G2’s hand, turns around and skip-hops backward while talking animatedly to G2. G2 strolls along listening intently and beaming.

TAYLOR SWIFT

‘Cause I like you

G2 grabs G1’s hand and pulls G1 in for an embrace. A soft kiss.

TAYLOR SWIFT

This ain’t for the best
My reputation’s never been worse, so
You must like me for me

G2 pecks G1 on the lips, then the cheek, and then back to his lips. As things escalate, G2 pushes G1 into a nearby BRICK WALL. G2 kisses G1 passionately, grabbing both sides of the face.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Yeah, I want you

G1 grinds his hips into G2 while grabbing the back of G2’s neck.

TAYLOR SWIFT

We can’t make
Any promises now, can we, babe?
But you can make me a drink

Both grind into each other and make out passionately.

CLOSE UP as G1 moves to G2’s neck.

G1 kisses G2’s neck, kisses up to G2’s chin, and then stops at G2’s lips.

WIPE TO THE LEFT.

CUT TO:

EXT. WEST VILLAGE INDIAN RESTAURANT

Okay, it’s a creative decision to make the restaurant Indian because I would like my cuisine to be considered sexy. So yea. Merp.

PAN THROUGH THE GLASS WINDOW INTO

INT. WEST VILLAGE INDIAN RESTAURANT

Circular tables litter the floor of the quaint and intimate Indian Restaurant.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it chill that you’re in my head?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate
(Delicate)

White tablecloths, gorgeous plating, and OTHER PATRONS in deep conversation. G1 and G2 in the middle of it all. Dishes featuring rich and bright Chicken Curry, Saag Paneer, and Rogan Josh, a creamy Raita, Naans, Rice, two plates with these foods, and two wine glasses all set around a singular long, red CANDLE.

CLOSE UP as G1 grabs his wine glass, swirling the Red within and brings it closer to his lips.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it too soon to do this yet?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate
…Isn’t it, isn’t it?

G1 leans to the side with his wine glass in-hand, taking in G2 as he talks animatedly while tearing his naan and scooping some of the curry and raita. G2 brings the naan to his mouth, chews, swallows, and then grabs his wine glass and sips. G1 looks on and smiles dopily while resting his head in one hand and holding his wine glass in the other.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Isn’t it? Isn’t It?
Isn’t it? Isn’t it?
Isn’t it?
Isn’t it, delicate?

G1 taps the side of his head to the beat. G2 grins and pushes his chair out. G2 sticks his hand out. G1 takes it and in one swoop, pushes his chair out. G2 jumps up and dashes away with G1 in tow.

WIPE TO THE RIGHT.

CUT TO:

INT. NIGHT CLUB LOUNGE

TAYLOR SWIFT

Third floor on the West Side, me and you
Handsome, your mansion with a view

ESTABLISHING SHOT of the Club Lounge. PATRONS dancing together.

SLOW ZOOM TO BAR WHERE…

G1 and G2 are dancing intimately. G2 holds G1’s wrist then takes both of G1’s hands in his, intertwining their fingers. Both G1 and G2 are swaying to the music.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Do the girls back home touch you like I do?

G2’s fingers trace down G1’s arms.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Long night, with your hands up in my hair
Echoes of your footsteps on the stairs
Stay here, honey, I don’t wanna share
‘Cause I like you

G1 sways and turns to face away from G2: G2’s crotch is on G1’s butt. Both sway to the beat while G2 holds G1 close in an embrace.

TAYLOR SWIFT

This ain’t for the best
My reputation’s never been worse, so
You must like me for me

Both break into more intricate choreography. Both body-roll and move to opposite sides while still grinding on each other. G1 pushes his back further into G2 while winding his hips to the beat.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Yeah, I want you

G2 takes G1’s hands and spins him to the beat to face G2.

TAYLOR SWIFT

We can’t make
Any promises now, can we, babe?
But you can make me a drink

G1 leads G2 to the Dance Floor. Both continue to sway in rhythm. G2 spins G1 out and back in, ending with a dip.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it chill that you’re in my head?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate
(Delicate)

CLOSE UP OF G2 HOLDING G1 IN THE DIP POSITION.

G2’s chest visibly rising as he looks G1 up and down in his arms. G2 smiles incredulously at G1, taking all of G1 in with his eyes.

SLOW PAN OUT TO SHOW ALL OTHERS ARE GONE – JUST G1 AND G2 ON-SCREEN.

G1 walks his fingers up G2’s arms. G1 slowly begins to rise from his dipped position to reach standing height, at which point his right hand will be on G2’s shoulder.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it too soon to do this yet?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate
…Isn’t it, isn’t it?

G2 guides G1 while taking deliberate steps to the beat in the beginnings of a salsa. Both G1 and G2’s fingers are intertwined with their hands toward the ground. Both slowly pick up their hands while intertwined until they reach full extension above and then…

TAYLOR SWIFT

Isn’t it? Isn’t It?
Isn’t it? Isn’t it?
Isn’t it?
Isn’t it, delicate?

Explosive moves. G2 guides both of them in a series of twirls and waltzing moves around the Dance Floor.

SPIN WIPE.

CUT TO:

INT. APARTMENT BUILDING HALLWAY

TAYLOR SWIFT

Sometimes I wonder when you sleep
Are you ever dreaming of me?
Sometimes when I look into your eyes

G1 leans against the Entrance Door and turns Doorknob with his back while G2 holds G1’s arms and kisses G1’s face and lips. G1 leans on the Door and pushes it open, and G2 continues to kiss G1 while both walk into the apt.

INT. APARTMENT FOYER

Floor-to-ceiling windows overlook the New York Skyline. The Apartment, with its masculine but homey decor, appears welcoming and lived-in.

TAYLOR SWIFT

I pretend you’re mine, all the damn time

G1 breaks the kiss, walks toward the Bedroom Door with G2 in tow, opens it, turns around, and faces G2.

TAYLOR SWIFT

‘Cause I like you

G2 smiles mischievously, hugs G1, and, not breaking his embrace, carries G1 through the Bedroom Doorway and

INT. APARTMENT BEDROOM

throws G1 on the bed.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it chill that you’re in my head?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate (delicate)
Yeah, I want you

G1 sits upon his elbows while kicking off his shoes. G2 dances while taking his shirt off. More goofy than sexual. G1 chuckles. G2 slowly climbs into bed with G1, lying next to G1 and staring longingly into his eyes.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that
Is it too soon to do this yet?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate (delicate)
‘Cause I like you

G2 touches his forehead to G1’s, his nose to G1’s, and then wraps his arms around G1. Intimacy galore.

INT. APARTMENT BATHROOM SHOWER

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that?
Is it chill that you’re in my head?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate (delicate)
Yeah, I want you

Shower time. A stream of water trickles into a waterfall from the shower head.

CLOSE UP on the water falling onto G1’s head.

G1 turns around, and G2 enters the shower, standing close to G1 under the falling water. Both beaming at each other and laughing as their hair and faces become wet.

CUT TO:

INT. WEST VILLAGE COFFEE SHOP

G1 sits next to the window facing outside, with a Latte, an open journal, and his smartphone nearby. Notes are scrawled all over the margins of the page.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Is it cool that I said all that
Is it too soon to do this yet?
‘Cause I know that it’s delicate
Delicate

G1 jots down a note and looks up to see G2 walking by wearing dark jeans, Nikes, and a leather jacket with the words “DELICATE – HANDLE WITH CARE” embroidered big on the back. G2 glances over at G1 and G1 smiles. G2 does a double take, smiles back, and walks out of the frame.

G1 grabs his smartphone, opens up an app called HAPPN (or whoever wants to do some product placement in a Taylor Swift video), and sees G2’s profile pop up. He pushes “LIKE” on the profile and a graphic saying “You have a New Connection” appears on-screen.

FADE OUT.

So… Thoughts? Sound off in the comments.

In a world where the Selenas, Duas, and Arianas of the world continue to churn out subdued, darker, and introspective earworms, Lady GaGa returns to the trenches in a most deliberate fashion. “Stupid Love,” modeled off of her No. 1 hit “Born This Way,” catapults the listener/viewer to worlds past when a song, regardless of its own merits, could capitalize on the imagery of its artist. In this sense, GaGa produces what is the amounts to the essence of an artist’s song. It truly is GaGa at its core – funky, loud, brash, unapologetic, and looking to change the world in the most subtle of ways.

“Stupid Love” plunges the listener into a tub full of what can only be described as the perfect blend of future nostalgia eight seconds in. From the anthemic pre-chorus (one that made me immediately picture a runway chock-full of GaGa’s greatest and most infamous looks and artistry over the years) to the in-your-face of her incessant pleadings (“look at me” and “all I ever wanted was love” being the most prominent), GaGa, BloodPop, and Tchami have concocted a near-perfect cocktail potent enough to distract listeners from the dire circumstances of society’s 2020. Take a listen – or five. Either way, it’s time to make way for the Lady as she reclaims her throne on top!

Rating: 3.5/5 stars

Take a listen and comment below !

While she may have burst onto the scenes of this new era pre-Quarantine with a reminiscent zest for life on “Stupid Love,” Lady GaGa (with the help of Ariana Grande) turns up the nostalgia even higher on “Rain On Me.” This newest offering flaunts a simple chord progression with gorgeous flourishes and a build-up that hearkens back to Stardust’s 1998 classic “Music Sounds Better With You” (and utilizes a slick, updated sample of “All This Love I’m Giving” by Gwen McCrae – thanks, Demi!). Between this Stardust/old-school Daft Punk sound, GaGa transports the listener to that last great night out with your friends at your local gay establishment. Picture it: you and your friends shuffle onto a crowded dance floor around 12:30 a.m., and THAT song starts to play – you know, the one that makes you turn to one another, squeal a little, and forget all about personal space while flailing around somewhat on-beat.

Ari pairs well with GaGa’s style of dancepop; when GaGa goes low, Ariana covers those high notes, and vice versa. Both with powerhouse vocals and runs to give other pop divas a run for their money. The resilience written into the very melody of the song has the potential to push the listener out of any funk they’re currently experiencing. GaGa is in rare form – her directive statement closing the song COMMANDS the listener to rain on her. To shower her with the love we hold deep inside for her. It’s a record that oozes positivity, and is reminds me of what “Break Free” was to “Problem” back in 2014; what “Toxic” was to “Me Against The Music” back in 2003; what “Blank Space” was to “Shake It Off” in 2015; hell, what “Teenage Dream” was to “California Girls” back in 2010 – the perfect follow-up to a stellar first single that can push a whole album into ICONIC status.

All in all, GaGa and Ari deliver the new anthem that may very well save our lives. It’s a bright, bright spot in a very dark place known as COVID-19, and it’s a slam dunk in what pop music has the power to do best – empower and lift us to conquer whatever life may throw our way.

Rating: 5/5 stars

Take a listen and comment below !

Update: here’s the companion video to this blog post

As issues of systemic racism against Black people have taken a front-and-center position across the United States, many of us may find ourselves distressed about the vastness, severity, and unjust nature of these issues.

While many people of color are leading the charge in advocacy and justice, people outside of these communities are dealing with the discomfort associated with unlearning racist beliefs; conducting their own research by learning from Black leaders, authors, filmmakers, and more; and having difficult conversations with family and friends about white supremacy, systemic racism, and the functionality of a society that benefits people outside of the majority group. As many of us engage in activism, it’s important that we avoid burning out. Here are some tips on how to combat activism burnout as it may arise:

• Self-care. For many who had never had to view discrimination outside of their own point of view, it can be daunting to see the world through the eyes of others. As a result, many people engaged in activism have found this experience to be exhausting and weighty. Remember to check in with yourself – doing so can help you recognize if something truly is bothering you – and refill your own cup before trying to fill the cups of others. Take breaks as needed to replenish yourself. By ensuring that you are functioning at your best, you’ll be able to continue fighting this fight for justice.

• Remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint. Many of us are ready to start making change immediately, and while that is a great attitude to have, is easy to burn yourself out this way. We are also working, dealing with another pandemic, and maintaining responsibilities in our personal lives. It’s important to know your own limits: stick to achievable goals. We are looking to make long-lasting change, so pace yourself.

• Remember what is in your control. As anxiety and uncertainty about this and the countless other major issues going on in the world grip us, remember to take stock in the things that still are within your control. Anxiety can lead us to believe that everything around us is for naught – that things seem out of our control. During these times, focus on the things that you can count on: a friend, coworker, family member, pet, or someone/something else that gives you joy. Those constants have the ability to ground us and help us from spiraling out. You cannot control how others will act while processing this crisis.

• Discuss how you’re feeling. Remember that you aren’t the only one feeling how you are feeling. Discuss with others to learn best practices, understand how to handle specific types of conversations, and commiserate over the state of racism in America. Check in on your friends and family members who are leading the charge of change with you. Try to gauge how others may be feeling before complaining about the discomfort, especially taking into consideration how privilege and worldview may be shaping your own experiences.

• Understand that not everyone will be open to changing. It’s important to note that many times the people you’ll engage in these conversations will choose to not listen or refuse to understand your points. Remember that any sort of introduction to this newfound information is helping to plant a seed deep in that person. Your actions, plus the actions of countless others, has the ability to develop a slow, but steady, change of heart in people unwilling to see the magnitude of the issues at play.

As always, if you’re in a crisis and need to speak with someone immediately, call the NAMI Crisis Line at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), text “HOME” to 741741, or reach the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. At the end of the day, it’s all about pushing forward the movement. As long as you’re making progress, that’s all that matters!

Just as the initial euphoric feelings of genius begin to wear off from subsequent, repetitive listens of both Jessie Ware‘s and Lady GaGa‘s recent offerings (“Stupid Love” and “Rain On Me“), my very-own feel-good pop queen Kylie Minogue jumps back onto the scene with the seemingly-polished but jarring “Say Something.” Take a listen below:

Taking hints from her previous show-stopping tunes, Kylie doubles up on nostalgia for this first single in over a year. Helming her soon-to-be-released 15th studio album “DISCO,” “Say Something” combines the laid-back essential feel of her 2010 single “Better Than Today” with the lyricism of “All the Lovers” and, more recently, “Dancing.” It comes down to anthemic choruses – ones that are bigger than the song. Ones that represent the moment in time.

One thing that truly stands out is her final 1:15-minute breakdown, reminiscent of her gorgeous “I Believe in You” and even Robyn‘s “With Every Heartbeat” – less of a copy and more of an homage. Its repetitive nature makes for a hypnotic and jarring experiences, chock-full of dramatic flourishes and a gospel-esque backing vocal to bring the listener to fully realize just how much love truly is “life.” I just wish that the producers had allowed for the chorus to continue on for an extra 8-count before moving into this final “message.” But, just as the pandemic cares little for what we truly want this year, Kylie and her producers push through to concoct a pop song that sounds every bit late ’70s as it sums up the variant nature of 2020.

Speaking of lyrics, Kylie and her team of writers perfectly sum up the loneliness so many of us may be feeling as a result of the mandatory isolation dominating our lives for past several months (see Coronavirus). She sings of checking in with friends. Of extending kindness to others. Of the longing that we all feel inside of us to be with the ones we love. She acknowledges those feelings and coerces us to dance those emotions out. And all in true Kylie fashion.

I find it interesting that as even more artists explore the disco genre in such high-profile releases (see: Dua, GaGa, Jessie, now Kylie), the world has come to its own reckoning regarding the treatment of vulnerable communities. The history of disco is a celebration of queer and black communities, two communities that have been front and center in revolutions shaping nations throughout the world last month. While these are cis-white women who are revisiting the roots of dance and disco, they continue to make it a celebration of both queerness and blackness. Here’s hoping that disco making a resurgence in western culture as mainstream culture is starting to question norms of injustice and systemic oppression has the ability to soundtrack victories for communities of color and other vulnerable communities worldwide.

Rating: 4.25/5 stars (I really wish that chorus was longer than an 8-count!)

At the moment, life is coming at many of us hard. Whether it’s COVID-19 continuing to wreak havoc on various populations, police brutality beating us down, the fallout of polarizing politics throughout the world, or even just work/family/friend struggles, there just happens to be a lot going on. Through all of this though, one thing remains constant: we can depend on ourselves to gain clarity and reflect on what is and truly isn’t fulfilling us.

This past summer has been a whirlwind of emotion – I myself have had a hard time keeping up and making sure the anxiety doesn’t get to me, but thankfully, even through all of the death and destruction of civilization as we know it, there has been clarity. It’s through the breaking down of our own systems that we can grow and move forward in ways that can be healthier in the long-run. With this in mind, I thought it prudent to revisit (nearly six months later) my discussion on COVID from the beginning of the pandemic. So here goes!

#TheIssue with Kittu Pannu: COVID Pt. II

As chaos ensues around us, I want to take some time to focus on ways we can minimize some of the issues surrounding COVID-19 and navigating this ongoing pandemic. Here are my five tips for combating impending loneliness, anxiety, and protecting not only yourself but others around you:

• Wear Your Mask: I’ll start with an easy one. This should be a no-brainer, but it’s important that we continue wearing our masks during the pandemic; proper mask-wearing can limit your ability to expose and/or contract COVID-19 when others around you are also adhering to proper mask-wearing protocols. I’m not sure when this fell out of vogue, but mask-wearing can help to protect yourself and people in society who are at higher risk of developing complications: babies, people with actual respiratory issues, others who live with disabilities, those of us with pre-existing conditions, and the ones who continue to refuse any responsibility for others through their selfish actions. Check out this article by Scientific American for more info on how to properly wear your mask

• Understand/Identify Your Emotions: This one I’ve sort-of touched on in the past. COVID brings up complicated emotions for so many of us. And for those of us who know how to deal with said emotions, we are able to cope; for those of us who don’t handle our emotions well, this is where things can evolve into much bigger issues. It’s important to identify the emotions you’re feeling, give yourself time to understand where it’s stemming from, consider what is in your control with that particular emotion, and then try to develop effective solutions to remedy your situation (check out Episode 1 if you’re having some trouble with this one).

• Create Your Own Social Bubble: This is all about interacting in-person with people who have all agreed to interact in a small group (preferably no more than 5 people because it will easily get messy otherwise). This particular group functions as your social circle – you can interact with these people without masks and without the need to social distance protocols, but ONLY IF you have established that the members of your social bubble are the only ones with whom you will interact in this manner. This is the most important part. It’s all about trust and ensuring that people remain strict with others whom they cannot verify if they have or have not been meticulous about their social distancing protocols. They are people with whom you can host dinner parties, remain in close quarters, and spend time in general without masks. The hallmark of an effective social bubble is the implicit trust that all members have about remaining faithful to the pact of not interacting with others outside of the bubble; it relies heavily on effective and honest communication.

• Understand Your Boundaries/Respect Others’ Boundaries: In setting up your social bubble, it’s important to establish ground rules for what works and won’t work for you. For example, if you want someone to be in your social bubble and they don’t want anyone in their social bubble to eat indoors at a restaurant during the pandemic, then it’s on that person to communicate that and on the rest of the group (should they choose to be in a social bubble with this person) to respect and adhere to these directives. The key takeaway from this is that the group has to default to the most restrictive of boundaries in order to work effectively. There is no space for judgment or bending the rules – COVID can be life or death for so many, so before you engage with others, have these difficult conversations and if something is too restrictive for you, explain it clearly and exit that social bubble. Important note: people can be added to your social bubble, but if you plan on meeting people outside of the bubble, just remember to self-isolate/quarantine for two weeks or get tested before interacting in-person with your established social bubble.

• Walking Away: This is probably one of the hardest parts to deal with – the fallout of others initially respecting your boundaries and then choosing to disregard them. This is where you need to feel empowered to get yourself out of the situation and walk away from that bubble. No social bubble is worth adding more anxiety to your life, especially during a pandemic. If people are constantly disrespecting your boundaries, it is clear that your (most probably) physical and (definitely) mental wellbeing are not necessarily being prioritized by said people. It would be prudent on your part to find another social bubble.

All in all, we are in the middle of the pandemic. I’m sure I haven’t really told you anything you aren’t already doing, but the major thing to remember here is to focus on having clear, open, and honest conversations about what you’re feeling (with yourself and others if that’s what floats your boat), what your COVID-19 boundaries are (especially with people in your social bubble), and when you feel like you’re not being heard or respected.

It’s about doing what is in our power to maintain our health – both physical and mental. Cheers to finding that sweet spot!

This year was anything but ordinary. In an effort to draw attention to the plethora of good music that made their way onto our playlists and recall some of the positive things that occurred this year, I’ve created my very own Top 70 Albums list of 2020. Here goes nothing!

No. 70: WOMB – Purity Ring

One of the biggest surprises music-wise for me was just how much I enjoyed Purity Ring’s Womb. Usually known for their macabre approach in their lyrics and stripped-down electronic productions akin to dream pop and witch house (don’t ask), I gave them a chance this year after listening to the gorgeous “pink lightning” and trance-like “peacefall.” While it’s not something I continued to listen to throughout the year (I try to limit my exposure to things that may be overly negative or numbing, especially if I’m feeling prone to depressive episodes, which was 2020 in a nutshell), I found the whole experience intriguing and reminded of other groups like CHVRCHES. Though the pace is slower and material darker than many of the other albums to be discussed here, there are some positive, lighter spots on the album, including “stardew.” Purity Ring showed me not only that there is a time and place for everything but that one should listen to oneself and figure out if exposure to something dark can/will alter one’s overall mood. If you’re not in the right state of mind, pass on listening to this album. Otherwise, give it a go!

(Positive) Standout tracks include: stardew and pink lightning.

No. 69: lil kiiwi – Kiiara

Four years in the making, Kiiara – yes that same Kiiara who sang that song from the Apple commercial way back when – finally dropped her debut album, featuring a smattering of hits since she struck “Gold” in 2016 and rose to prominence. On the 14-track LP, Kiiara sings about some of the most relatable things: fuccbois being their problematic selves. Incidentally, Kiiara leaves off some of the best songs she’s created off the LP, including my favorites “Messy” and “Open My Mouth.” While the newer singles and album tracks don’t necessarily deviate from her proven formula of backbeat, distorted ad-libbed vocal noises, and lyrics focused on the perils of dating immature guys, Kiiara still finds a way to turn the listening experience into something that gleams bright without demanding much from the listener. The album functions like fool’s gold – pretty to look at (or listen to, in this case), but without providing too much insight into the artist and her life experiences. And that’s totally okay! Because instead, we are gifted an album that, while more or less predictable and leaning toward pleasant background noise, creates enough of a vibe to soundtrack the countless more exciting things happening on the other side of the speakers.

(New) Standout tracks include: I Still Do, Numb, Bad One, and Brightside.

No. 68: Changes – Justin Bieber

This year, Justin Bieber released Changes, an LP that was supposed to personify the changes he himself had embraced in his life. And while that may have been the case personally, the album did not necessarily deviate from the stylings that Bieber has embraced in the past. It’s Journals 2.0, but without the variety that fuels an enjoyable listening experience. In fact, of the 17 tracks that make up Changes, the collection remains homogenous, not really having a chance to create memorable moments in the listening experience. While there are certain songs that do stand out a LITTLE bit in comparison to their fellow tracks (see “Forever,” “Intentions,” and “Running Over”), much of the album blends together, not really providing much of a change when listening to the album itself. It’s funny, because his subsequent releases, including collaborations with Chance The Rapper and Shawn Mendes (“Holy” and “Monster,” respectively), both embody the changes he boasts with this LP, yet neither would seem to feel at home on the album. It’s a decent effort, but for 17 tracks, it tends to drone on. And when there aren’t many moments of excitement present, listening can become relatively excruciating at certain points. It will be interesting to see how this album fares during the Grammys in 2021.

Standout tracks include: Intentions, Forever, Running Over, Yummy (Summer Walker Version), and ETA (specifically because it reminds me of All That Matters).

No. 67: Wachito Rico – boy pablo

Channeling his best Tame Impala and Vampire Weekend impressions, Boy Pablo, or Nico Munoz, doubles down on the sad boy indie pop-rock sound he cultivated several years ago on his debut. Heralded as a breakthrough artist in his native Norway, it’s not hard to see why – he has a way with lo-fi, synth-driven, vibing productions that provide just enough context through lyrics to help audiences connect with his music. The issue, though, is that it just starts to sound a little bit repetitive. And this is where Munoz may need to step up and really go that extra mile. Because doing so can help him move past his YouTube fame and become the multifaceted artist we all know he has the potential to be. Overall, the album isn’t bad – it’s just more of the same. And remaining consistent can be much-needed in a year as devastating as 2020.

Standout tracks include: hey girl, leave me alone!, honey, rest up, come home, moustache, and wachito rico.

No. 66: Wonder – Shawn Mendes

Let me start by saying I usually enjoy Shawn Mendes’ music, but I was so disappointed by the power yelling on the title track while throwing in trippy Beatles moments and homages to David Bowie that I didn’t even want to consider the album for my 2020 countdown. Fortunately, there are much, much better highlights that showcase a natural progression for the artist known as Shawn Mendes. Regardless of where the guy falls on the sexuality spectrum, one thing that shouldn’t be attempted on his part is inserting himself into the lanes of fellow pop stars who are dominating their current slices of the pop “pie” – I’m looking at Shawn’s attempts to jump into territory that Harry Styles is owning so well. They are valiant attempts – they start off well enough, but they end up falling flat somewhere in the middle. But where Shawn actually soars are on his album tracks; it’s a tale as old as time (or in his case, since 2015). Shawn releases singles that, while catchy, end up not being the most compelling content in his body of work. The same goes here: on simple, stripped songs like “24 Hours,” we hear Shawn do what he does best: a full falsetto where he discusses how he hopes to love his partner. But we also see positive growth in production on songs like “Higher” and effective use of layering on “Dream.” And he nails the cutesy pop reminiscent of his classic hits like “Lost In Japan” and “There’s Nothing Holding Me Back” on “305.” But much of this is overshadowed by Shawn’s attempts to mimic stylings of other singers when he should be focused solely on the artist he wants to be. It truly makes me “Wonder” how/why he released an album with two distinct styles. Hopefully, Shawn will figure out his direction and maintain this artistic growth for the future!

Standout tracks include: Song For No One, Piece Of You, 305, 24 Hours, Dream, Higher, and Can’t Take My Eyes Off You (BBC Live Version).

No. 65: Church – Galantis

While 2020 may have been more hell and less heaven, Galantis took us to Church and made us believe in the power that a slick production and uplifting lyrics can have in redefining perspective. Always the type to craft clean and uplifting songs, Galantis doesn’t disappoint in meeting these same expectations on their third studio album in just five years. Featuring the glorious “Faith” with vocals by the queen of goodwill Dolly Parton (and one of my father’s favorite singers), the album is a pleasant listen that is bound to leave the listener feeling better than they originally did. But, though the album truly is delightful and a bright spot in an otherwise difficult year, it serves as a reminder of the complacency that so many amazing artists can fall into. Church does little to change up or refresh the formula Galantis to express their artistry. As Galantis tries to tell us that we’ve “never heard a love like this,” but that’s simply not the case – see literally their whole discography. It’s almost as if they haven’t grown as artists over the course of half a decade, which we all know can’t be the case. Because of this, the LP tends to fade into the background of other Galantis productions, leaving much to be desired. I will say, they do try to change things up with songs like “Hurricane” and “We Can Get High,” but more exploration and risk-taking could have helped make this album stand out from its predecessors. And that’s not to say that the album is anything other than great – it’s just that after 5 years, it may be prudent to innovate and reach new levels of artistry instead of churning out the same dog and pony show year after year.

Standout tracks: Faith, I Found U, Steel, Unless It Hurts, Stella, Miracle, and Feel Something.

No. 64: kelsea – Kelsea Ballerini

Let me start by saying I’ve always found Kelsea to be a precarious country singer – her voice and lyrics always reminded me of a pop musician’s, but she has always been billed as new-age country. And this album helped me understand this billing so much more. A combination of pop and country sensibilities, “Kelsea” hugs this tightrope well, balancing the rich storytelling of country music and the infectious hooks of pop music. Whether it’s Kelsea singing about “the other girl” and her man being a “bragger” or the sob story of a “homecoming queen” and how she processes by writing “a country song,” Kelsea exhibits the versatility needed to fully realize the pop-country genre in which she currently reigns. Overall, I was pleasantly surprised at how much I truly enjoyed this album throughout 2020 – between seeing her perform live last year (she opened for Kelly Clarkson), the strength of her single choices, and her versatility as an artist, she’s made a fan out of me, and I’m excited to see her continue to develop her unique position in the music space.

Standout tracks include: hole in the bottle (the Shania single remix is pretty adorable), the other girl, half of my hometown, the way i used to, needy, and a country song.

No. 63: The Photograph Soundtrack

Helmed by the amazing Robert Glasper, The Photograph Soundtrack manages to capture the soul not only of the film itself, but of New Orleans and the surrounding areas where the story hashes out. With only three vocal tracks on the 15-track album, a majority of the album relies solely on instrumentals, allowing the listener to be transported into the rich tapestry of imagery developed by cinematographer Mark Schwartzberg. Relying on R&B and jazz, Glasper takes a beautiful story and manages to convey the same plot just using sounds synonymous with the Big Easy. And the results are truly breathtaking. When it comes to the three vocal tracks, Glasper recruits HER, Erykah Badu, and Lucky Daye to voice various parts of the story, and the results sound perfectly at home in the thick of the plot. Specifically, “Comfortable” by HER and “Fade Away” by Lucky both incorporate R&B and jazz in ways that not only move the plot forward but remain true standouts and gorgeous moments worth remembering from the film. As someone who claims New Orleans as his hometown, the soundtrack and subsequent film gave me immense joy and pride through its beauty and splendor, and it’s helped introduce me to the musical genius that is Glasper.

Standout vocal tracks include: Comfortable and Fade Away.

No. 62: Dark Lane Demo Tapes – Drake

“I got all these blessings just to give them to others anyway…”

With nearly 15 years in the game, Drake hit back in 2020 with Dark Lane Demo Tapes, a preview of his upcoming studio album. Stepping away from the radio hits that usually litter his releases, Drake steps into the experimental, production-light limelight that accentuates his rapping and singing skills, showing us just why we fell in love with his talent all those years ago. Whether it’s quoting Eminem in “Chicago Freestyle” or inventing a new dance craze for TikTok consumption with “Toosie Slide,” Drake makes sure to dial up reflection and tone down the flexing that tends to permeate throughout other rap albums. Leaning more into the introspection that solidified his legacy during 2011’s Take Care, Drake pieces together a moody collection of songs that sound right at home during the uncertainty of 2020. And if this album is any indication of the caliber of his 2021 project, the world truly isn’t ready for its greatness.

Standout tracks include: Desires, Chicago Freestyle, When To Say When, Not You Too, Landed, D4L, Pain 1993, Demons, War, and Toosie Slide.

No. 61: Duality – Duke Dumont

On his debut album Duality, Duke Dumont puts quality over quantity. Throughout the 10 tracks, Duke creates a darker, moody experience that immediately transports the listener to the middle of a rave where countless faceless bodies continue to move amongst and against one another. The album covers various facets of the electronic genre that Duke has laid claim already: EDM, trance, electro-pop, tropical-house, and even a full-on piano interlude (see the gorgeous “Overture”) – but all wrapped in layers upon layers. The whole album is a mood – it relies more on feeling than fully-developed lyrics, production more than gimmicks, structure more than uniqueness. And in these trade-offs do we find what Duke does best: create the looping melodies that can numb out all other focuses and soundtrack those nights shrouded in the cover of smoke, strobes, and looks that say much more than words ever could. It‘s the soundtrack to those nights when you can truly become one with the music – where nothing else matters but the sounds enveloping you.

Standout tracks include: Therapy, Nightcrawler, The Fear, The Power, Ocean Drive, Together, Love Song, and Let Me Go.

No. 60: EREZ EP – Sally Boy

I’m not going to lie – I definitely judged this EP by its cover when it came to giving it a chance and a spin (SPOILER ALERT: he’s shirtless). But Sally Boy, or known by his mother as Erez Potok-Holmes, manages to combine the chillest of vibes with a throwback nostalgia that promises to fulfill our wildest suburban dreams while still maintaining that edge that can drive us crazy. Throughout the seven tracks, Sally Boy uses low-fi pop and clean production to remind us of failed high school romances and the countless empty promises fuccbois would whisper into our ears that the hopelessly romantic teen inside us would choose to believe until we realize that he happened to be using the same lines of every single person in our class. We travel through the various stages of an almost teenage love. And it makes sense: the EP flows as a reflection of a teenage dream ripe for reminiscence, with the elements of discovery, meet-cute, falling into the pit of unrequited love, and the subsequent crushing of Erez’s heart. And while there may be a slight misstep here and there (see “Kane” and the Dolce Gabbana line), the EP does a great job at harnessing the uniqueness of a middle class suburban wet dream of a teenage romance. Here’s to even more music from this newcomer!

Standout tracks include: Sally Boy, Stormy, I Wonder, To You, and Marie.

No. 59: R.Y.C – Mura Masa

Deviating from the electronic roots that brought him breakout success on his self-titled studio album, Mura Masa took on a more rock-oriented approach on his latest effort R.Y.C. With collaborations from other indie artists like slowthai, Georgia, Clairo, and Tirzah, Mura Masa makes sure to keep central to not only the production but also the vocal soul of the album. This is evident in how each song inevitably sounds like a Mura Masa song instead of a collaboration, as especially through his own personal stories making their own spoken word debut on “meeting at an oak tree” and the spooky but oddly calming “In My Mind”. The album sounds less futuristic as was the case with his debut and more full of nostalgia, which makes it an understandable by-product of the pandemic and the changing world around us. There’s a certain innocent youthful nature that you can never truly shake when listening to the minimalist sounds that Mura concocts for his second album. And honestly, the listener shouldn’t want to – whether it’s the hypnotic sweeping sounds of “In My Mind,” the rushed insistence of “Deal Wiv It,” or the funky soul of “Live Like We’re Dancing,” each song serves as some facet of Mura’s personality and another instance of a much-needed jolt of happiness and possible introspection during an otherwise tumultuous year.

Standout tracks include: No Hope Generation, I Don’t Think I Can Do This Again, Deal Wiv It, vicarious living anthem, In My Mind, Today, Live Like We’re Dancing, and Teenage Headache Dreams.

No. 58: Queen & Slim Soundtrack

Within the first ten seconds, listeners already know they’re in for a wild ride on the Queen & Slim Soundtrack, curated by Dev Hynes. Whether it’s the jarring and shocking “Ride Or Die” by Megan Thee Stallion and VickeeLo or the soulful “Yo Love” by Vince Staples, 6LACK, and Mereba, this soundtrack creates an experience that truly envelops the listener, making it hard to simply pause halfway through. Using some of the biggest names in black culture, Hynes cultivates an experience that explores themes of police brutality, black excellence, and living the American dream. In terms of it functioning as a soundtrack to a motion picture, the LP does leave a little to be desired, especially in providing the necessary sounds to induce further introspection on various emotions surrounding grief that may plague the characters, instead focusing more on the connection and partnership that is central to the plot. But as a collective album, it does provide a healthy smattering of knowledge and curiosity that can lead the listener to learn more about the issues facing Black people and BIPOC communities today.

Standout tracks include: Ride Or Die, Collide, Guarding The Gates, Soul Sista (Remix), Getting Late, Yo Love, Catch The Sun, and Runnin’ Away.

No. 57: missunderstood – Queen Naija

When Queen Naija didn’t immediately churn out a full-length album after her hit single “Medicine” in 2017, many wrote her off as a one-hit wonder. Fast-forward to 2020, when she released missunderstood, a cohesive, solid effort that incorporates the right amount of personality and attitude to help her reintroduce herself to listeners everywhere. Within the first ten minutes, listeners are treated to two samples: Erykah Badu’s “Bag Lady” on “Pack Lite” and DeBarge’s “A Dream” on “Lie To Me.” The homages are apparent from the beginning, but they’re indicative of Queen’s style – her voice croons about the trials and tribulations in love that black women have had to deal with, so it makes sense for her to pull inspiration from some of the greats who have paved the way for her. Throughout the album, one thing remains consistent: Queen Naija remains true to her own experiences, pouring her soul into her songwriting and reaping gold from her trauma. Whether it’s a failed marriage, birthing a child, or just straight-up dating, Queen writes about what she knows best, and she does it well.

Standout tracks include: Love Language, Pack Lite, Dream, One Time, Pretend, Trial & Error, and Butterflies Pt. II.

No. 56: Yesteryear – Cosmo’s Midnight

Yesteryear sounds like what rose-colored glasses and nostalgia would sound like in a year where the things we cherished were unavailable to us – and it’s what makes the album work so well. Leading with elements of electronic, rock, and indie pop, Cosmo’s Midnight set out to make a record that incorporated an updated and accessible disco and funk vibe that could wash away much of the gloominess of 2020. And at this, they succeed. Incorporating elements of bossa nova, the tracks function as a calming wave that washes over the listener. It’s the ultimate in lounge music. The perfect soundtrack to an outdoor summer hangout; the songs sound just familiar enough to lull the listener into a sense of security but also just distinct enough to inspire curiosity. It’s an album that doesn’t ask for much but demands the listener to not only smile but thoroughly enjoy oneself. And that is what makes it such a worthy listen.

Standout tracks include: Yesteryear, Unwind, It’s Love, Have It All, A Million Times, Down For You, We Could Last Forever, Time Wasted, CUDI, and Idaho.

No. 55: Blood Harmony (Deluxe Edition) EP – FINNEAS

The co-producer to what we have come to know as the Billie Eilish phenomenon, FINNEAS graced us with his debut EP Blood Harmony late last year, re-releasing it with new material in August, featuring his 2018 hit and a remix of his biggest solo hit to date. (Due to the late release last year and the subsequent Deluxe version, I’m considering this album as a 2020 release.) So the thing about this EP… it highlights the things we love about FINNEAS as an artist and producer – great storytelling, great melodies, great production – it’s as if he took a page out of Justin Hurwitz’ playbook in creating the songs. But it’s hard to know if this is truly representative of him. If this truly is his experience. For example, lyrically in “Partners In Crime” he references drug usage, distribution, prison amongst other issues that seem to be out of scope compared to his openly-discussed experiences. But, they are still compelling narratives, especially when woven into the tumultuous love affair he croons about. This is problematic solely because the EP serves as an introduction to FINNEAS. It’s through songs like the former and even “Shelter” that we see the glorious collaborative nature that is FINNEAS’ persona – the songs sound near perfect to have been on Ed Sheeran’s latest release, but instead feel out of place and pull focus away from what the audience really wants: to figure out who he is – away from his sister, away from the other artists. Yes, he can become king of the SadBoiPop movement, but it would be nice to know who he is before we crown him. And while he may not yet earn the crown in my eyes, his EP is full of hidden gems and beautiful storytelling that will keep the mystery alive for us.

Standout tracks include: I Lost A Friend, I Don’t Miss You At All, Break My Heart Again, and Let’s Fall In Love For The Night.

No. 54: Year Zero – Tchami

Years in the making, French DJ Tchami, AKA Martin Bresso, finally made his eagerly-anticipated debut with Year Zero. With a knack for combining house and future electronic styles, Bresso dives deep for allusions to some of the genre’s defining forces, including French duos Daft Punk and Justice, amongst other heavy hitters. The results are a 16-track cohesive piece of work that transports the listener to an ultra-suave rooftop lounge, where drinks cost the same amount as your utility bills – it sounds almost too exclusive for us plebeians but we still manage to get in and share in the experience. Through the sleek, silky vibes etched into the production itself, Tchami doubles down on the sound and experience his audience has come to know and appreciate over the years – the difference is it’s polished beyond belief in a way that comes through truly understanding one’s signature sound. As a producer, Tchami has truly come a long way since he remixed Janet Jackson’s throwback “Go Deep” – see his collaborations with Lady GaGa on ARTPOP and Chromatica. And throughout it all, he’s been able to truly refine and redefine who Tchami is while delivering a solid, hour-long romp of a debut album.

Standout tracks include: Buenos Aires, Proud, Heartless, Shine On, All On Me, The Light, Sweet Savage, Rebirth, and Ain’t That Kind Of Friend.

No. 53: ENERGY – Disclosure

Honestly, I’m surprised Disclosure’s ENERGY didn’t GENERATE more hype than it had. It’s quintessential Disclosure: from the collaborators to the tracks themselves, it’s a continuation of the sound they’ve explored and polished throughout their career. But instead of simply copying and pasting their tried-and-true formula, something happens midway through – a shift incorporating afropop and elements of hip-hop that while quite enjoyable, sound slightly out-of-place when placed next to their cut-and-dry formulaic electronic work. Whether it’s drum and bass, garage, deep house, or funk, Disclosure delivers what we have come to know and love from them. But in that same light, while they did try some new things, they didn’t seem as committed to this exploration. But, their familiarity is what makes this release work – in a year where similarly-sounding material can bring comfort to the masses, Disclosure succeeds in doing just that.

Standout tracks include: Tondo, Know Your Worth, Get Close, Birthday (VIP Remix), Watch Your Step, Lavender, Douha, and Ecstasy.

No. 52: The Renaissance – Aluna

I’ll start by saying Aluna from AlunaGeorge holds a special place in my heart. The girl is a formidable performer and definitely gives her all when she’s on stage (as was the case when she opened for Sia in Houston back in 2016). On The Renaissance, Aluna trades her counterpart George in to explore her own identity, especially within the realm of dance music. As such, she reconciles her own signature sound with her discoveries from other facets of dance. It builds off of the sounds from AlunaGeorge’s last LP I Remember and even perfects the minimalist forays from their Champagne Eyes EP. The results, while not as polished as she usually comes across, is a joyous exploration of a Black woman who is finding herself musically and outside of the production she’s known for. She remains a chameleon – her voice accompanies the collaborations with fellow black artists readily in a way that shows her own versatility as an artist. The Renaissance, in essence, is Aluna reaching out on her own, combining the winning parts of her style of R&B with various parts of electronic and dance music. It illuminates her own personal and professional growth as she throws caution to the wind and stretches the boundaries of music she’s been placed between. It is, ultimately, Aluna’s own Renaissance.

Standout tracks include: The Recipe, Don’t Hit My Line, I’ve Been Starting To Love All The Things I Hate, Off Guard, and Get Paid.

No. 51: Confetti – Little Mix

I’ll begin by saying this album has bops falling down like Confetti from start to finish. Little Mix has always had a knack for sampling and combining various genres in an accessible way, and the music present here is no exception. Whether it’s trap-R&B on “Nothing But My Feelings,” hip-hip on “Rendezvous,” electro-tinged pop on “Holiday,” or nostalgic teen-pop/jack-swing on “If You Want My Love,” Little Mix does what it does best: surprise the hell out of us by producing high-quality pop music that will most probably be underappreciated by the masses in the US. At the end of the day, Little Mix remains dependable for a fun, middle-of-the-line, sweet, “Sweet Melody,” and their latest effort continues to solidify this trend.

EDIT: this is also Jesy’s last album with the group as she stated today that she’ll be leaving the group to protect her mental health. Unfortunately, Jesy endured a ton of online bullying, and, while I support her decision to withdraw from the group, it’s just so disheartening to see her stop pursuing this dream because of relentless critics. She was my favorite  

Standout tracks include: Sweet Melody, Bounce Back, Not A Pop Song, Rendezvous, Holiday, Confetti, Breathe, Nothing But My Feelings, and If You Want My Love.

And that wraps up Nos. 70-51… Click here to see Nos. 50-31!

Do you agree with these rankings so far? Comment below

Welcome to Part 2 of Kittu’s Top Albums of 2020! The stakes are higher, the music better, and the memories associated with these songs that much richer. With several surprises, upsets, and even showing love to some indie music, Nos. 50-31 may have you Christopher Columbusing your new favorite artist of the year. Look for the first installment (Nos. 70-51) here. And now, BEHOLD! Nos. 50-31!

No. 50: Papi Juancho – Maluma

Arguably one of the biggest music stars in the world, Maluma could probably release a 50-minute loop of him coughing and calling himself Papi Juancho and we would eat it up (honestly, let him do whatever he wants – the guy is dreamy). On this album, we see Maluma unfortunately fall back on his borderline womanizing persona he had abandoned so long ago just one album ago. It makes sense that he would double down on a sure topic when working on music made during the pandemic – it’s where he feels safe, where he isn’t taking many risks, and where he apparently isn’t letting people in to see who he actually is (he’s gone on record to say that he’s not the lothario his music paints him to be). Filled with the machismo prevalent in Latinx culture, we see Maluma doing what he’s done in the past: treating women like objects of desire and vessels of pleasure. Sure, he’s playing a “character” – a horny guy who’s been locked in his house during a pandemic, but still. For a guy who may actually not be a Kinsey 0, It’s especially important for someone who has such a major platform to introduce more cultural significance to respecting women. But I digress.

Back to the album. The production doesn’t really deviate from the flavor of reggaeton we have come to expect from Maluma. It doesn’t mean that it’s not good – on the contrary, Maluma creates a vibe that conveys the exact mood he’s looking for: an exterior of confidence to provide a glossy covering on the loneliness and sadness he’s his character is probably feeling being stuck in isolation. It’s one of the few problems that transcend class, looks, and talent during this pandemic. And it brings us to the problem at hand: the music overall isn’t bad – it’s just not at the standard of a global icon like Maluma. If this release is indicative of anything, it’s that Maluma may not feel the need to dive deeper and become even a better version of himself. And that’s okay. In the meantime, I’ll stream “Hawái” a million more times.

Standout tracks include: Me Acuerdo De Ti, Hawái, Quality, ADMV (either version honestly), Medallo City, Bella-K, Cielo A Un Diablo, Perdón, Luz Verde, Parce, and Madrid.

No. 49: Mama’s Boy – LANY

Pouring out their hearts and souls and rocking out is nothing new for the indie band known as LANY. But instead of discussing heartbreak in excruciating detail as they did on their previous album Malibu Nights, they shifted gears, reflecting on family, Oklahoman roots, and even throwing in some religious undertones. From my understanding, the sound and themes were greatly influenced by their experiences with the pandemic. At a time when so many of us were forced to reckon with our pasts since there was literally nothing else to do besides binge watch another terrible Netflix reality show about Gen Z kids dating, it made sense that the boys of LANY decided to reflect on their own upbringings. The results come through with allusions to Christianity, love, and relationships. And while these may have been interesting topics lyrically, all of this reflection seems to have sacrificed the sound and production that makes LANY truly unforgettable. We do see snippets of this in “good guys” and “bad news,” but they traded in their signature synths for a more country, contemporary Christian feel as seen on tracks like “i still talk to jesus.” Not all is lost, though – it’s through the magic of their heartbreak and personal stories that we see them shine (see “if this is the last time”). Through the 14 tracks, LANY proves that they have more feathers in their cap – will we enjoy each feather? Probably not, but they exist, and they are just another part of the band’s artistry that we as fans will have to accept. And they’re doing a pretty solid job even if it’s not akin to “ILYSB.”

Standout tracks include: cowboy in LA, heart wont let me, if this is the last time, good guys, sharing you, bad news, when you’re drunk, sad, and you!

No. 48: Colores – J Balvin

I’ll start by saying this was the first full-length J Balvin album I thoroughly enjoyed from start to finish. At ten tracks, it’s a lot easier to hit that threshold but I digress. Let’s start with the album itself. Colores means colors, and it’s a motif that literally pops up throughout the album. Like the various colors that light up the cover and tracklisting, listeners are exposed to the various shades of Balvin’s personality, musical prowess, and his ability to genre-hop at a moment’s notice. Much of the album functions at a normal energy level – without the highs and lows in production, the listener can fully focus on the mood Balvin creates. Littered with stories of relationship woes, the things he holds above all else (his hometown), and the dynamics of his interactions with love interests, Balvin provides stories that are not only relatable but make you want to get up and shake your booty. Combine this with his desire to make a record that exudes positive vibes, and you have a recipe for success in 2020. If there’s something I needed more of this year, it was that. Yes, the work may not hold a candle to some of his earlier works (“Mi Gente” still slaps and Brillo honestly was EVERYTHING), but through its subtlety, was can learn much more about J Balvin’s own motivations. And that’s what makes this album so special.

Standout tracks include: Gris (I ADORE this song), Amarillo, Azul, Morado, Verde, Negro, and Arcoíris.

No. 47: Notes On A Conditional Form – The 1975

“It is not time for civil disobedience, it is time to rebel.” – Greta Thunberg, “The 1975“

From the album opener featuring Greta Thunberg, The 1975 kicks things off with a BANG to personify the rebellion on the first actual song on the album “People.” From here, we see Notes On A Conditional Form transition through various acts and moments with no central theme. Dealing with huge issues like climate change, politics, imposter syndrome, love, and loneliness, the band tries to take on a lot – and utilizes their knack for genre-hopping to pull it off. But through their ambition, they get lost in trying to create something that can do so much. This project, originally slated for a 2018 release, kept getting pushed back; I believe each iteration saw them experimenting with a different genre, tinkering, then moving on, picking up the scraps of the productions and tacking them onto the LP, or at least that’s what it sounds like. Each experimental phase has its moment – but this disjointed approach isn’t something that will work for casual listeners unfamiliar with The 1975. The album as an LP comes off as jarring – a collection of ideas without a thesis. The songs are truly great, and this approach can allow listeners to access the music in various ways, but it honestly made me wonder why they didn’t just turn this LP into a series of EPs. Notes is proof that while genius should be rewarded, sometimes it just needs to be reeled in, reorganized, and reduced down. At the end of the day, the album as a sum of its parts may not necessarily work, but those parts do sound pretty great.

Standout tracks include: What Should I Say, Guys, The 1975 (Greta KILLS it), People, Yeah I Know, Jesus Christ 2005 God Bless America, Roadkill, Me & You Together Song, I Think There’s Something You Should Know, Nothing Revealed / Everything Denied, Tonight, Shiny Collarbone, If You’re Too Shy, Playing On My Mind, and Having No Head.

No. 46: Brightest Lights – Lane 8

Let me start by saying this album is a whole mood. It’s present, but it allows the listener to indulge as needed, never requiring more attention to absorb or be absorbed into the ambiance of the music. Using loops and familiar beat counts, Lane 8 is able to craft an album that is at worst hypnotic and at best the soothing sounds we needed in 2020 to calm our anxieties and push through. While the instrumental tracks are where Lane 8 truly shines, the vocal ones also are nothing to shy away from. Whether it’s dealing with the paralyzing fears that can cause inaction on “Road,” the magic of relationship beginnings on “Brightest Lights,” or everything in between the beginning and end of a relationship, listeners are transported to a safe haven of trance and deep house, where pandemic life takes a gentle pause for an hour. And it’s this escape that makes this album so enjoyable.

Standout tracks include: The Flood, Road, Brightest Lights, Don’t Let Me Go, Groundhog Day, Just, Sunday Song, The Gift, How Often, Howling Hand, and The Rope.

No. 45: BEFORE LOVE CAME TO KILL US – Jessie Reyez

If there’s one thing that Jessie Reyez does well, it’s pouring her whole soul into every track she creates. And that’s what we have with BEFORE LOVE CAME TO KILL US. It’s introspection to the max – with a drum kit. You hear someone who’s on the verge of breaking but who pulls back just enough to not go all the way. Her voice: wild, untamed, packing all of the emotion she writes about. This isn’t acting – this is truly her emotional response. And it’s what makes the tracks so memorable. But then, there’s the issue of how the album is perceived as a collective. There is a central theme: dating, being wronged, remaining hopelessly in love with someone who’s bad for you… but the tracklisting itself changes based on each iteration of the album (there are physical, digital, deluxe digital, deluxe vinyl… all of these editions have different tracklistings!) that it’s hard to understand what is the perceived order to Jessie’s madness that she wants us to experience it in. As a collection of songs, it tells the story of meeting someone, falling in love, and the aftermath. We see a woman heartbroken, and at times liquored up, slurring, trying to numb herself using drugs and sex (“IMPORT“). But we also see someone full of vengeance and ready at a moment’s notice to scorn her former lover (“DO YOU LOVE HER“). She, like her album, jump from reaction to reaction, heightening the drama and making the reactions seem a bit much when taken disjointedly. When taken together, the album feels more like a collection of songs she’s known for. But when focusing on the actual music, we see Jessie’s conviction in telling her story authentically. And that’s what makes the songs (and her) succeed on so many levels.

Standout tracks include: ANKLES (the Rico Nasty/Melii Version), NO ONE’S IN THE ROOM, BEFORE LOVE CAME TO KILL US, WORTH SAVING, COFFIN, INTRUDERS, LA MEMORIA, IMPORT (the 6LACK Version), SAME SIDE, FIGURES, DOPE, FAR AWAY II, and DO YOU LOVE HER.

No. 44: Smile – Katy Perry

Something to consider when discussing Katy Perry and her post-PRISM album releases is that the pop star was able to capture lightning in a bottle and extend that success over TWO album releases (Teenage Dream and PRISM). This sort of back-to-back success and high-quality output just doesn’t usually happen so easily. So when it did, the bar for success became borderline-unattainable. And it’s why the general public chose not to embrace her last LP Witness with the same fervor as they had reserved for Teenage and PRISM. It’s not that the album was trash by any means – it truly was a solid one. But, it wouldn’t ever live up to those expectations.

And with that out the way, let’s discuss Smile Katy began working on the album while also dealing with her own mental health struggles, and the results of these concurrent journeys are immortalized in her lyrics. Reading more like a self-help guide for pop fans, listeners may feel lighter, more upbeat, and able to take on the world after giving the LP a play. Opening with “Never Really Over” (or one of the biggest songs of 2019 for me), I knew that I’d already be in for a great time. Whether it’s a Zedd-assisted track like “Never” or the very many songs that could feel at home on previous releases like “Cry About It Later” and “Not The End Of The World,” Smile takes the cheesiness of her bombastic “Firework” and amplifies it throughout the nearly hour-long duration. And yes, this unabashed positivity (see the title track) may be annoying at times, but it ultimately works as a form of consistency we have come to hate love from Katy. In a year where the world around us continues to crumble, pop music like this can provide some solace. Smile may not be considered her strongest outing by any means, but there are bright, happy spots that’ll turn any frown upside down.

Standout tracks include: Only Love, What Makes A Woman, Daisies (Oliver Helden Remix), Cry About It Later, Teary Eyes, Never Really Over, and Harleys In Hawaii.

No. 43: Insecure Season 4 Soundtrack

Star of Insecure Issa Rae and music supervisor Kier Lehman did it again with the Insecure Season 4 Soundtrack: an eclectic collection of contemporary R&B, rich, soulful music, and a sprinkling of some more FORWARD songs to soundtrack the many youthful moods not only captured in the television show but of our own lives as viewers. For a show that has continued to top itself in exploring what it means to be a young black woman in America today (with many relatable experiences for POCs of all gender expressions), it’s Season 4 Soundtrack does just that – it captures the soul of the season, focusing on the dysfunction, the longing, the relationships, and, above all else, the blackness of the show. Represented are artists from Rae’s and Lehman’s personal libraries: a collection of contemporary artists and newcomers from the Los Angeles area (where the show takes place). Such is the process of curating the soundtrack they undergo season after season. And, just like literally every part of every episode, she manages to curate a collection that fits PERFECTLY with the mood episode after episode. I honestly haven’t seen a collection of soundtracks remain spot-on like this since The O.C. Mixes of the early 2000s. It just goes to show that Issa truly is at the top of her game. Let her continue flexing and educating the rest of us. Take all my money, Issa! You deserve it.

Standout tracks include: Bad Decisions, Never Lonely, Feng Shui, The Love That I’m Giving, Reaching, Infrastructure, Rewind, Cadillac Drive, Show You (Remix), Velvet (Remix), If It’s Good, Dirty, and Eat Itself.

No. 42: Miss Anthropocene – GRIMES

Known for her lighter pop forays, Grimes flipped the script with her latest Miss Anthropocene, embracing darker undertones, industrial pop, and trancelike electronica. It starts off almost ethereal, even otherworldly, but then the mood quickly shifts. Focusing on existential death and destruction in the physical, emotional, social, and biological senses, Grimes takes a more cut-and-dry approach to production, giving listeners something almost devoid of actual emotions in many cases. This is most apparent on songs like “We Appreciate Power,” her pitch for the benefits of artificial intelligence. This sterility in production initially comes out at “4Æm,” when she deconstructs one of my favorite Bollywood songs (“Deewani Mastani” from Bajirao Mastani) from recent years, frankensteining it into a sense of urgency RE climate change and it’s effects on the body (even though it does sound like a glorified homage to DJ Fresh’s 2010 hit “Gold Dust”). It’s only when talking of strong negative emotions that we see the production shift away from this sterile construction, as if the issue of death cannot simply be as cut and dry. The album as a concept works well as a whole, but it is definitely something where multiple aspects have to snap into place for the listener to thoroughly enjoy the experience. Whether it’s issues of apathy (“My Name Is Dark“), suicide and drug abuse (“Darkseid” and “Delete Forever”), abandoning old traditions and cultural norms (“New Gods”), or realizing the true weight of having to put others above your own well-being (“So Heavy I Fell Through The Earth”), the album personifies the vices Grimes feels will lead to our destruction as a species. We see Grimes stretching her comfort zone in so many ways, especially when considering that the one time she has ever sung over someone else’s production occurs on the transcendent “Violence,” which honestly feels almost out of place with the darker tone of the album. She incorporates her takes on punk, rock, and nu-metal to show how far from her own past music endeavors this whole concept truly is. And in some weird way, it all comes together in the end.

Standout tracks include: So Heavy I Fell Through The Earth, Delete Forever, Violence, 4Æm, New Gods, My Name Is Dark, You’ll miss me when I’m not around, and We Appreciate Power.

No. 41: Cape God – Allie X

Canadian songstress Allie X came back with a vengeance in February when she released her second studio album Cape God. Departing from the dancefloor-driven electronic beats that garnered her so many fans, she trades it in for minimalistic productions where her personal and cutting lyrics can take center stage. Following a concept based on the lives of small-town Americans dealing with issues surrounding addiction, Allie was able to tell her own personal stories through the fictionalized lives of these Cape God residents. The results were meteoric – we find Allie developing much more as a storyteller and creating an even more cohesive sound that becomes the central motif holding the album together. Since her last album, Allie has collaborated with artists like Troye Sivan, Mitski, Betty Who, and Leland, all of whom dominate the indie-pop airwaves through expressive writing. Through these collaborations, we see a new side of Allie – one that emphasizes the lyricism and cohesion of the track, drawing the listener into the whole song instead of getting lost in the distractions of the production. Overall, Allie X delivers a deep and dreary yet hopeful LP that you can’t help but root for.

Standout tracks include: Fresh Laundry, Devil I Know, Sarah Come Home, Rings A Bell, Love Me Wrong, Susie Save Your Love, Life Of The Party, and Learning In Public.

No. 40: Heaven & Hell – Ava Max

Talk about an electrifying debut album – Ava Max takes the listener on a tour of heaven, hell and everything in between on Heaven & Hell. With nary a breather in-sight, Ava infuses the tropes of dance music with floor-filling samples and frivolous lyrics that demand little from the listener while still producing a solid positive response. One can’t simply listen to this album in full and not bust a move. Whether it’s allusions to classics like ATC’s “Around The World” in “My Head & My Heart” or ABBA’s “Gimme!” in “Torn,” Ava knows the value of a good throwback. And that energy is consistent throughout the album. Spanning 16 songs, the album functions as a 50-minute escape from the many issues that continue to crop up in 2020, while not demanding much from the listener besides the occasional hip shake. Disregarding the atrocious “Sweet But Psycho” (I honestly despise that song so much), Ava knocks this album out the park. Here’s to bigger and better things for Ava in 2021!

Standout tracks include: My Head & My Heart, Kings & Queens, Naked, Call Me Tonight, Born To The Night, Torn, Take You To Hell, Rumors, and Salt.

No. 39: Legends Never Die – Juice WRLD

Released posthumously, Legends Never Die shows Juice WRLD confronting his inner demons and struggles head-on. In the aftermath of his untimely death at the end of 2019, fans who felt the deep void that his presence once held were blessed with such a cohesive piece of work seamlessly connecting various aspects of hip-hop, R&B, pop, electronic, and even rock. His estate did well in arranging something that felt at home in his existing discography while also preserving the aspects that made him successful. Spanning 22 tracks, there truly are no skips throughout the listening experience. Confronting issues of mental health, addiction, heartbreak, and more, Juice WRLD hit on topics that many heavyweights in his genre would normally shirk from. It’s through this raw honesty that we were able to get an unfiltered look at just how pervasive these issues are. Through his music, Juice WRLD was able to normalize many issues that could cause shame, loneliness, and depression in the general public. And for that, I am truly grateful for his artistry and legacy.

Standout tracks include: Life’s A Mess, Come & Go, Tell Me U Luv Me, Bad Energy, Righteous, Hate The Other Side, I Want It, and Man Of The Year.

No. 38: The Slow Rush – Tame Impala

Hypnotic. Ambient. And just a sprinkle of eccentricity. After a five-year wait, in which frontman (and only man honestly – Tame Impala is just one guy) chose to collaborate with powerhouses Rihanna and Lady GaGa (see tracks like “Same Ol’ Mistakes” from ANTI and “Million Reasons“/”Perfect Illusion” from Joanne, respectively) and even newcomers like ZHU. Kevin Parker, or the Impala himself, roots himself in the sweet spot between rock and dance/electronic music, and the results of such a foundation are beautiful. Building off of the momentum of his last LP Currents, Parker capitalized on the new forays into more mainstream pop he left in the aforementioned artists’ canons, taking these lessons and experiences to inform this latest effort.

Thematically, the album focuses on time, a construct that both Parker and his music tends to ignore. Whether through his timeless melodies and arrangements, the lyrical content, or the very state to which his music transports the listener, Parker does a great job at diving into the manmade construct in a way that truly transcends it. In a moment where so many of us have time to spare, copped up in isolation or self-imposed quarantine due to the pandemic, this album soaks up this excess of time while still maintaining weight and meaning. It’s like eating Halotop ice cream – it’s shouldn’t be allowed, but then you realize you’re eating something that tastes delicious and is a greater, healthier, and more thoughtful experience. From the album cover that features grains of sand that overflow through an open window to the (false) notions of what the human psyche can handle on the album opener and closer, The Slow Rush takes what makes pop, electronic, and modern rock, enmeshing them together to form a blueprint for something that sounds all at once futuristic, classic, and contemporary.

Standout tracks include: Borderline (original is great, but the Blood Orange Remix is SUBLIME), One More Year, Breathe Deeper, Glimmer, and Posthumous Forgiveness.

No. 37: ALICIA – Alicia Keys

This year marked the return of Ms. Alicia Keys with her self-titled LP ALICIA. We see her return to the constructions that made Alicia a household name: piano-driven and traditional R&B songs. She’s more at-ease in her comfort spots, as witnessed on songs like “Time Machine,” “Underdog,” “Show Me Love,” and “Authors Of Forever.” Yes, it does seem like it’s more of the same on first glance, but that’s where the magic is – she takes the formulas we have come to appreciate from her and infuses socio-political commentary and personal stories into her lyrics. As a result, we are left with a much more personal and less polished offering – something that feels more authentic. There still are hints and homages to her past hits, like the soul of “No One” being everpresent in the anthemic stadium-R&B of “Love Looks Better;” the warm, relaxed, flowery “Jill Scott” that transports the listener to a dreamscape of subtle but welcome sultry energy; and of course the gorgeous “Three Hour Drive” shows Alicia doing what she does best: a stripped-down production with just her and Sampha basking in their chemistry, akin to some of her biggest hits like “Fire We Make” and “My Boo.” ALICIA, just like 2020, lacks the polish that she had always embodied before 2016’s HERE, which is why it’s a great representation of this year: lacking the expected poise but still packing the emotion and chops to transport the listener to a higher understanding of themselves.

Standout tracks include: Time Machine, Authors Of Forever, Underdog, 3 Hour Drive, Me x 7, So Done, Love Looks Better, You Save Me, Jill Scott, and Perfect Way To Die.

No. 36: It Was Good Until It Wasn’t – Kehlani

One of the most compelling newish faces in R&B, Kehlani has become a force to be reckoned with in the industry (and yes, she’s been around with the mid-2000s, but she broke through the cultural conscience around 2016). As a former crush stated on Instagram, “Feat. Kehlani” is a whole love language. When Kehlani is involved, you know that the quality will be worth the listen. And when it comes to this release, Kehlani oscillates between baring her soul and calling out relationships that have defined her since her last LP. The results? A sublime, moody, versatile body of work that takes the listener to task in owning their sexuality. In true Kehlani fashion, she paints vivid pictures of past relationships, the struggles that plague so many of us, and the passion that pushes her to argue with the partners that drive her crazy. She confidently explains to her partner that she can “Change Your Life,” asks them what she “Can” do in the bedroom to ensure their needs are met, and calls out the “Toxic”-ity of past relationships. It’s this vulnerability that makes her such a compelling and worthy staple of any playlist. And in a year when so many of us had our own emotions to make sense of, Kehlani’s stream of consciousness and organized confessionals function as inspiration in accounting for the emotionally-taxing experiences in our own lives.

Standout tracks include: Toxic, Can I, Bad News, Water, Change Your Life, Everybody Business, Serial Lover, F&MU, Can You Blame Me, and Grieving.

No. 35: Jaguar EP – Victoria Monét

Sultry. Direct. In control. These are the words that describe Victoria Monét on her latest release entitled Jaguar. Like the jungle cat, Victoria shows herself to be at the top of the food chain with a bite that is much stronger than she lets on. Through her direct and calm approach to discussing sex, we see a woman who takes topics that can devolve into cheap attention grabs handle them delicately, framing them within the parameters of such gorgeous production. And she thrives over the nine track EP. Incorporating elements of disco, neo-soul, R&B, jazz, and funk, Victoria sounds refreshing, slick, and above the cut compared to her contemporaries. The only disservice she had done to her fans was to not place the Kehlani remix of “Touch Me” on the EP itself. Jaguar reportedly makes up the first-half of Victoria’s debut album; and if this is just part one, I can’t wait to see what Ms. Monét has in store for the second act.

Standout tracks include: Moment, Big Boss, Dive, Jaguar, Experience, Go There With You, and Touch Me (Original).

No. 34: BE – BTS

2020 marked the beginning of my K-Pop (and related genres) exploration, where I discovered phenomenal vocalists singing in languages (mostly Korean but also some Japanese/Cantonese) that I didn’t understand at all. I figured if I can do it with French, Russian, Romanian, Spanish, and Hindi/Punjabi, I could do so with these languages, too. And now, I’ve opened my ears to gorgeous productions, beautiful vocals, and so much talent! One such act that truly blew me away was BTS – not just the immense star power each member exudes, but the infectious beats and confidence when they perform had me moving along with them.

And then BTS decided to drop BE, their latest full-length studio album, and things just would never be the same. Churning out hit after hit, the album takes the best parts of the pop genre and blends them to create one of the most cohesive K-Pop releases of the year. With melodies that sound both familiar and fresh, the boys of BTS provide the listener with a feel-good time. Whether it’s hits like their No. 1 hits “Life Goes On” or “Dynamite,” there truly are no low points throughout the 8-track LP. It’s the caliber of the release that makes me understand the hype – it’s all for good reason. BTS truly possess that unique star quality that makes them worthy of the praise they receive. Here’s to (reluctantly) stanning for a group of boys half my age and joining the BTS army.

Standout Tracks include: Fly To My Room, Blue & Grey, Telepathy, Dis-Ease, and of course the explosive Dynamite.

No. 33: Songs For You – Tinashé

Let me start by saying I’m WELL aware that this album was released in late November 2019. But I finally got around to listening at the beginning of this year. As is the case with any sort of Tinashé release, the production, song quality, lyrics – everything I look for in music – was on-point. But what made this album stand from her own discography is how it all truly works together. All of the songs sound at home here, which is a feat if you’re familiar with this girl’s previous releases (and the drama surrounding them – thank god she’s not at RCA anymore). We hear Tinashé channel her vulnerability, saccharine-sweet voice, and sexy-sultry ease into pure art. Mind you, her alter-ego Nashé does come out on several tracks, but never to alienate other women in the game. Gone are the constraints of studio records, and instead we have a woman who, for the first time in a long time, remains at the creative helm of her ship. On a studio album. Not a mixtape.

We hear the moodiness; the raw, unfiltered nature; the amalgamation of hip-hop, R&B, electronic, and indie pop. To create something so joyful. Something so real. Something so… Tinashé. Though genre-hopping can be a distraction for other artists, with Tinashé, it sounds effortless and natural. Each song evokes a different emotion, guiding us through the labyrinth of her own experiences over the past several years. But throughout it all, she remains a tour de force, piquing our interest ever second of the 52-minute album. As the title implies, these truly are her songs for us, her fans. And it sounds pretty damn amazing.

Standout tracks include: Hopscotch, Feelings, Touch & Go, Perfect Crime, Die A Little Bit, Life’s Too Short, Stormy Weather, Save Room For Us, Know Better, So Much Better, and Remember When.

No. 32: Good To Know – JoJo

Since releasing MAD LOVE. in 2016, JoJo re-recorded her first two albums. I think that during this process, she started to become even more in-tune with her vocal capabilities, control, delivery, and purpose. The results of this consciousness echo throughout her 2020 release Good To Know. We see a grown-up JoJo who understands the power of her voice, exerting control in ways that best accentuate each aspect of the songs present. The album opens with a recital of her own “Bad Habits,” recounting the issues that I’m sure other people have pointed out to her over the years. The theme of the album is “good to know,” almost like a response to the unsolicited advice and criticisms she’s received over the years. We transition into “So Bad,” her ode to a former flame she’s still hung up on, then onto “Pedialyte,” the epitome of the night after a long night or drinking. We see her then edging her way back into the love that consumes her. It’s a celebration of lovemaking – it’s the olympics and her lover snatches that “Gold.” We see her interject her desires to have that person in her life with songs like “Man” and the hauntingly beautiful “Lonely Hearts.” The thing that people may forget is that JoJo truly is a musical genius when it comes to bottling up the essence of heartbreak and longing – we’ve come a long way from her “Leave” and “Too Little Too Late” days, but instead of fun pop hooks, we are left with more mature reflections on what these actions actually mean. She can get raunchy (“Love Reggae”), nasty (“Comeback”), or in control (“Kiss”), but she also understands the importance of mature, communicative relationships (“What U Need”). We see a woman coming of age, making mistakes, regretting them, but remaining her most honest self – someone who truly owns her decisions and celebrates herself unabashedly. And it’s a beautiful thing to see.

Standout tracks include: So Bad, Pedialyte, Gold, Man, Small Things, Lonely Hearts, Think About You, Comeback, Don’t Talk Me Down, Kiss, Love Reggae, and What U Need.

No. 31: Love Goes – Sam Smith

Love Goes is Sam Smith at their best – heartbroken. Except instead of reducing themselves in the process of grieving (as they’ve done in the past), we see a person who confidently calls out their former love (“Diamonds”), extends the olive branch (“Another One”), stands by their choices (“For The Lover That I Lost” – incidentally, they wrote it for Céline Dion, who recorded it for her last album), and taking ownership for their actions (“Breaking Hearts”). It’s a much more mature approach than we’ve seen from Sam in the past, and it’s refreshing. They explain how they can’t love anyone else until they “Forgive Myself,” passively understand just how fleeting love can be on “Love Goes,” and acknowledge how these experiences truly change us (“Kids Again”). They also give us a rallying cry for the pandemic in the album opener “Young.” Love Goes is a celebration of the follies of love. Of dating. Of being human. It’s a beautiful journey that ends with the realization that we are truly better for the things we experienced. Thankfully, Sam was smart enough to include most of the singles they released over the past two years as bonus tracks, all of which sound pretty comfortable on this album. I just wish their cover of Donna Summer’s “I Feel Love” would’ve made the cut, too.

Standout tracks include: Young, Another One, Diamonds, My Oasis, So Serious, Dance, For The Lover that I Lost, Breaking Hearts, Forgive Myself, Love Goes, Kids Again, To Die For, Dancing With A Stranger, Promises, and How Do You Sleep?

And that wraps up Nos. 50-31… Check out Nos. 30-11 here!

Do you agree with these rankings so far? Comment below

In Part 3 of my Top Albums of 2020 List, I’m splitting hairs – the quality of music is so great, but there has to be some give. I present to you Nos. 30-11, featuring some of the biggest Latin, R&B, Rock, Pop, and Soundtrack albums of the year. For the first installment (Nos. 70-51), click here, and the second installment (Nos. 50-31), here.

And now, BEHOLD! Nos. 30-11!

No. 30: Chilombo – Jhené Aiko

From the first note on the piano intro of Chilombo, Jhené Aiko transports listeners to a lush, tranquil safe space, where we can fully explore the emotions and feelings that have “Triggered” her since 2017, including her breakup with Big Sean. Chilombo evokes a sense of balance and nature, almost as if it’s challenging listeners to join Jhené on her journey of self-reflection, to understand the peaks and valleys of her relationship gone bad and apply them to their own lives. It’s like a cleansing of auras, especially when considering the inclusion of crystal alchemy sound bowls into the instrumentation, replacing the negative energies that have plagued Jhené (“None Of Your Concern”) with experiences that nourish her instead (“Speak”). This sort of back and forth continues to play out thematically over the 29-track deluxe edition. Always one to create a vibe, Jhené does just that, even if it’s a MUCH longer experience than expected. In her reflection, Jhené remains confident and honest with herself, discussing her sexual prowess (“P*$$Y Fairy”), melancholy (“One Way Street”), and resolve to move on (“Born Tired”). But as zenned out as Jhené gets, the album does tend to drag on somewhere in the middle, almost imitating our very own meditation experience, where the listener falls asleep instead of achieving the nirvana we initially set out to achieve. As cutting as Jhené has been in the past, we see her rely on her guest stars to inflict the deepest wounds on others. Instead, when focused solely on Jhene’s voice in the contest of the borderline ambient production, it’s almost trance-like, suspending the listener in a pool of their own relaxation. In a word, the album is chill, and probably best accompanied by the same things Jhené suggests partaking in on “Tryna Smoke.” It isn’t until the 12th track that we see a fully-realized Jhené, one who is ready to move on with her life. And it’s at this point that the album’s tone shifts much more positive.

For the most part, the album tends to churn out more of the same. That’s not to say that it isn’t great, it’s just that when taken as a whole, it becomes monotonous. Yes, Jhené could have trimmed down the album, shortened the tracks, or combined specific vibes in certain cases, but I digress. The album is self-indulgent, but Jhené has earned the right to be, especially when considering how she rolled out the album. But, when taken as a whole, I hope that Jhené has gotten over Big Sean. Because after listening to this damn long album, I’ve gotten back with him and broken up already.

Standout tracks include: Summer 2020, Down Again, Come On, B.S. (Original Album Version w/ HER or Deluxe Version w/ Kehlani), Party For Me, Mourning Doves, Born Tired, Tryna Smoke, Happiness Over Everything, P*$$Y Fairy, Speak, None Of Your Concern, and Triggered.

No. 29: Charlie’s Angels Soundtrack

While the late 2019 film may not have fared well at the box office (honestly, y’all, it was a really cute film, but yes, it probably would’ve fared better on direct-to-streaming or VOD), pop fans were treated to a stellar soundtrack at the behest of executive producer Ariana Grande. Just like the film deviates from the kitsch that brought the early 2000s franchise so much success, Ariana trades in the obvious, easy choices for soundtrack accompaniment, focusing on curating new songs from some of her longtime friends and collaborators like Normani, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, and Victoria Monét, while tapping legends like Chaka Khan and the estate of Donna Summer for updated contributions. The results speak for themselves: Kash Doll’s “How It’s Done” packs all the punch of a Charlie’s Angels’ theme song with the holistic girl power movements, “Bad Girls (Gigamesh Remix)” updates the classic and gives us the LIFE we never knew we were missing on the dance floor, and Anitta’s “Pantera” seduces the listener until we are left begging for more. But that’s the thing – the soundtrack meshes perfectly with the actual film. The same people expecting more campiness and fewer modern updates are the same ones who probably hated the album. Ariana did exactly what she would have done under any circumstances – curate an album that fit the film. And since this project was bookended between thank u, next and 2020’s Positions, the Charlie’s Angels Soundtrack sounds very much at home with her discography – not the strongest album she’s recently created, but definitely capturing the sound of women’s empowerment today. It’s a cute album for a cute movie – it tries to do nothing more or less, and in that, it succeeds perfectly.

Standout tracks include: How It’s Done (by Kash Doll, Kim Petras, Alma, and Stefflon Don), Bad To You (by Ariana, Normani, and Nicki Minaj), Don’t Call Me Angel (by Ariana, Miley Cyrus, Lana Del Rey), Eyes Off You (by M-22, Arlissa, and Kiana Ledé), Bad Girls (Gigamesh Remix) (by Donna Summer), Nobody (by Ariana and Chaka Khan), Pantera (by Anitta), How I Look On You (by Ariana), Blackout (by Danielle Bradbury), and Got Her Own (by Ariana and Victoria Monét).

No. 28: CALM – 5 Seconds of Summer

Calling the MEN of 5 Seconds of Summer! At some point over the past five years, the Australian band traded in their teen heartthrob pop/rock for full-on rock moments of CALM (as seen on the album opener “Red Desert”). There’s something so cool, CALM, and collected about the band this time around. Gone are the days of pleading and desperation. Instead, we have four bandmates who, in their surety and confidence, know exactly what they want. That confidence permeates throughout the album in a way that helps them shed their manufactured boyband personas. When considering the album as a whole, it doesn’t live up to its CALM monicker by any means, and I’m grateful for it (incidentally, CALM is just an acronym featuring the first letters of each bandmate’s name). Experimenting with various shades of industrial, synth, dance, grunge, soft, and pop-rock, 5SOS manages to pack the album with songs that not only all make sense together but embrace the more mature themes of their grown-up lives. Gone are the days of them being down simply because someone looks so good standing there (“She Looks So Perfect“); they’ve traded it in for compromises they ultimately appreciated (“Old Me“). Through homages to rock legends, 5SOS finds a way to solidify their status as a full-fledged BAND – not just that boyband who toured with One Direction all those years ago. They have emerged as fully-formed musicians in their own right. And as they continue to croon, they truly continue to soundtrack the “Best Years” of their fans’ lives, and I’m here for it.

Standout tracks include: Red Desert, No Shame, Old Me, Easier, Teeth, Wildflower, Best Years, Not In The Same Way, Lonely Heart, and High.

No. 27: Brightest Blue – Ellie Goulding

Her first major release since 2015’s Delirium, to say that Ellie was overdue for new music would be an understatement. In the time since, we were gifted a soundtrack submission (the hopeful “Still Falling For You”) and collaborations with Kygo (“First Time”) and Clean Bandit (“Mama”), all of which were indicative of the more pop-oriented sound she originally explored for the album (see “Close To Me” and “Hate Me”). But after releasing several singles, Ellie settled on a more introspective sound, something that made sense within her moody and experimental discography. The thing is, as much as we love Ellie, she’s not and will never be your traditional pop girl. She will always be a little off-center when attacking the latest trends. And this is what makes her stand out. In that same vein, we have quintessential Ellie on display with bombastic mid-tempo moments like “Love I’m Given” and “Tides,” an experimental side that hadn’t really come to full fruition on the last album with “Wine Drunk” and “Brightest Blue,” and those cutting lyrics that strike tears to fall almost immediately, as is the case with “Flux” and “Bleach.” It’s funny because the first disc (first 13 tracks) flows cohesively – there is a method to her madness. There’s a rawness that envelops the listener after finishing it. But then the bonus disc jolts the listener out of the slower-paced funk of the regular album tracklisting. Together, the magic does come off slightly disjointed, it’s not to say those songs aren’t worthy of release – they just feel like different, former versions of the Ellie who sits in front of us, fully realized from the first disc. On Brightest Blue, Ellie is deep in her feelings. Growing as a woman. Making her mistakes. But taking ownership. And through that ownership, we see the beauty in our own missteps.

Standout tracks include: Start, Power, How Deep Is Too Deep, Love I’m Given, Ode To Myself, Woman, Tides, Wine Drunk, Bleach, Flux (cannot stress how gorgeous of a song this one is), Brightest Blue, Worry About Me, Slow Grenade, Close To Me, and Hate Me.

No. 26: Manic – Halsey

One of her most cohesive releases thus far, Halsey channels her inner mania into a raw and emotional journey of self-discovery on Manic. Littered with personal stories and lyrics, Halsey rejects the concept album ideal that usually drives her LPs forward. And it turns out to be the thing that elevates Manic to golden territory. Much of it is focused around the highs and lows of Halsey’s own experiences with bipolar disorder, which add to the disjointed drama that ultimately unites the whole album. There’s almost a childlike simplicity and innocence that remains present throughout the listening experience… a part of Halsey that is and will always remain through the struggles, the pain, the love, the betrayal, the misunderstandings. Playing out like a deep dive into Halsey’s own psyche, the listener becomes privy to the self-doubt (“Forever… is a long time”), the self-destruction (“3am”), the desperation (“Graveyard”), the loneliness (“More”), the self-medication (“Dominic’s Interlude” and “I HATE EVERYBODY”), the self-empowerment (“You should be sad,” “killing boys,” and “Alanis’ Interlude”), the self-assurance (“Still Learning”), and finally the self-realization (“Suga’s Interlude” and “929”). And while the topics are all over the place, they all give the listener a holistic understanding of Halsey. The only thing that would have made this album even better for me would have been the inclusion of her 2019 single “Nightmare,” which, incidentally, was supposed to serve as the first single for this album. Alas… But just as she embodies variations of rock, R&B, pop, electronic, and more, it’s the unique way she chooses to express herself that draws us in and keeps us listening for more than an hour. It’s her unapologetic nature, her openness, her raw honesty that truly makes this album worth listening through.

Standout tracks include: Ashley, Graveyard, You should be sad, Forever, all the Interludes, I HATE EVERYBODY, 3am, Without Me, Finally // beautiful stranger, killing boys, More, and Still Learning.

No. 25: The Album – BLACKPINK

Before I jumped on the BTS bandwagon, I initially started my K-Pop through exposure to the genius of BLACKPINK songs like “BOOMBAYAH” and “KILL THIS LOVE” – and I didn’t “Know What To Do.” BLACKPINK fit into the specific type of artistry I tend to stan almost immediately: female empowerment and intricate choreography (see: Britney Spears, Kylie Minogue, Janet Jackson, and Madonna). So when they started to release music in 2020, including the jaw-dropping collaboration “Sour Candy” with Lady GaGa, I knew what to expect in terms of production, melody, and infectiousness. Queue the bombastic “How You Like That,” sugary-sweet “Ice Cream,” and subsequent full-on international LP The Album. Spanning less than 30 minutes, it feels like a tornado – one moment you’re sitting there living your life and then all of a sudden The Album plays and you’re living off of the sweet sounds of Jisoo, Jennie, Rosé, and Lisa. Honestly, the only SLIGHT missteps on the whole album are the two collaborations: “Ice Cream” with Selena Gomez sounds like the perfect US Radio song, but it’s not a BLACKPINK signature song; and “Bet You Wanna” just misses the mark due to a lack of presence from the members, focusing most of the song around Cardi B’s flawless verses instead of around the girls themselves. But these minor issues do little to detract from BLACKPINK blowing the door to the US market off its hinges in the most “Savage” of ways.

Standout tracks include: How You Like That, Pretty Savage, Lovesick Girls, Bet You Wanna, Crazy Over You, and Love To Hate Me.

No. 24: BEFORE EP – James Blake

One of the most prolific writers in the game currently, James Blake has been hard at work this quarantine, quenching the thirst of his fans every now and again with one-off releases, including his EP BEFORE. Known for his minimalist approach to electronic music, we see Blake experiment with strings, piano, and layering in newer ways to accentuate his focus on the topics occupying his mind during quarantine: his immense love (for Jameela Jamil), the restless/listlessness he has been going through relegated to his home during the pandemic, and his reflections on all the things playing out around him. There’s a certain desperation and lack of trust that tends to plague those of us who may feel like their lives may be too good to be true (as we see him respond “really?” on “Do You Ever”). We also see him considering how secure he truly feels in a relationship on the title track “Before.” Throughout it all, Blake sounds almost ethereal in his own vocals, matching them to instrumentals that, in addition to the love, loop around in layers slowly consuming the listener. It’s almost as if time and space stop for the 20 minutes the EP spans, with his production and vocals saturating the gap between them. And the listener sitting right in the thick of it. Surrounded by the love, lightness, and dance that has consumed James already, lifting him up to become a creature of flight, calling from the heavens above and sharing the gospel of the dancefloor. The only thing that would’ve made this EP even better would have been including an updated version of “Are You Even Real,” which is why James ranks where he does.

Standout tracks include: I Keep Calling, Before, Do You Ever, and Summer Of Now.

No. 23: 3.15.20 – Childish Gambino

In a surprise release as the pandemic started to upend life as we knew it, Childish Gambino seemingly came out of nowhere and dropped his latest studio album 3.15.20 on his website for 12 hours before taking it down altogether (and subsequently reposting it on streaming services a week later). A collection of the musical musings he had made since 2017, we see Childish explore the signature sound he’s developed – a mixture of Prince and more contemporary rap/R&B artists like OutKast and Funkadelic. Taking on a sense of despondence about the world, the album came at a time when so many of us were experiencing similar doubts about the capitalistic structures and relics we projected “everlasting” expectations upon. A reflection on the very systems that failed us this year, we see Childish dive deep into philosophical discussions about “Time,” the love we receive (“24.19”), how ruthless the world can be (“19.10”), grief (“35.31” and “39.28”), and “the violence” (“47.48”). Infused with funk, hip-hop, and R&B, we see Childish does what he does best: wax poetic over an infectious and unique production. Yes, the subject matter can be worrisome, but as Childish always champions, it’s okay to dance those cares away regardless of how terrible things may truly be. The album exists not only to educate, but to entertain in spite of itself. Just like Childish balances making sense of his own celebrity and the power he wields as a cultural icon – in its scary and humbling experiences – he distills these emotions into 3.15.20. Just as Childish challenges viewers through on-screen performances to really see issues at hand, 3.15.20, in all its glory, poses the same questions – just with the help of pretty great production.

Standout tracks include: Algorhythm, Time, 12.38, 19.10, 24.19, 35.31, 39.28, 42.26 (AKA “Feels Like Summer”), and 47.48.

No. 22: Plastic Hearts – Miley Cyrus

A chameleon of music, Miley Cyrus takes on a punk rock persona for her latest era Plastic Hearts. As she does with every era changeup she embarks upon, she thoroughly immerses herself into the experience – in this case, it mean mullets, (sober) rockstar behavior, and collaborating with some of the biggest rock legends in the game, including Billy Idol and Joan Jett. And the results? A performative album that ended up being one of the most cohesive album releases of the year. Yes, this is the same Miley that indulged in Black culture for her most successful album era (Bangerz), then moved onto the stoner-chic of Her Dead Petz, and subsequently to her California sunshine vibes/country-pop of Younger Now all within the span of a couple of years. She, like the queen Madonna, is great at reinventing herself, but while it’s usually understood that Madonna is playing a character, Miley tends to overcommit to her personas and trash her previous eras, which I tend to find relatively annoying – especially when they’ve been hugely influential in developing her image and helped her understand who she truly is. I digress.

Plastic Hearts truly is an edgy record that dives headfirst into classic rock in all forms, trapping listeners (willingly) as “Prisoners” throughout the listening experience. And we see a confident Miley who’s found a rest stop as she continues to try on various genres around her for a best-fit, with elements of her past feats revealing themselves various moments, like the influences of country-pop in “High,” or a full-on Bangerz moment with “Gimme What I Want.” Lyrically, we hear a woman who remains brutally honest about her experiences – something we can always depend on from (she’s just being) Miley. Overall, Miley develops a persona and companion album that effectively capture the aesthetic she aims for, and with such a high-quality presentation on this 12-track LP, she’s found another hat that fits quite well.

Standout tracks include: WTF Do I Know, Plastic Hearts, Angels Like You, Prisoner, Gimme What I Want, Night Crawling, Midnight Sky, High, Hate Me, Bad Karma, Golden G String, and Edge Of Midnight.

No. 21: B7 – Brandy

This whole album is a MOOD! Trading in the bigger, radio-friendly, rhythm-dominated songs that she is known for (see: “Full Moon,” “Boy Is Mine,” “Afrodisiac,” “Put It Down,” I could go on…), Brandy focuses on the blues this time around on B7. In one of her most personal and cohesive albums to-date, Brandy sings about what she knows: her own struggles. Queue deep lyrics about love, mental health, vulnerability, and everything in-between. She strips back the production to place the most important instruments – her voice and songwriting skills – front and center. It’s a huge risk, but it’s something that seasoned veterans like Brandy can pull off with ease. It isn’t until we get to the middle of B7 at “Say Something” that we get to hear elements of the old Brandy. But that’s the thing – it’s not the early 2000s. Brandy is not the Queen of the charts anymore. Instead, we are introduced to Brandy 2.0, someone who has to dig deeper into her well of emotion to quench our thirst. A singer who truly can sing circles around the rest of the girls on the charts. And a woman who sounds like she’s giving herself permission to have fun, cut loose, and enjoy her craft once again. To be proud of her talents (as she calls herself the GOAT on “Saving All My Love” – and for good reason… her godmother was the one and only Whitney Houston after all). It’s refreshing. It’s everything. It’s Brandy at her best.

Standout tracks: I Am More, High Heels, Rather Be, Unconditional Oceans, Lucid Dreams, No Tomorrow, Say Something, Baby Mama, and Love Again.

No. 20: Ungodly Hour – Chloe X Halle

“Don’t ever ask for permission… ask for forgiveness.” – Intro.

From the opening of their latest LP Ungodly Hour, Chloe X Halle assert this principle. We see them navigating the messiness of life, draped in sleek productions and baring so much through their songwriting. Executive produced by the one and only Beyoncé and influenced by ’90s R&B, the record plays out as an updated version of the golden age of girl group R&B – think the best of TLC, Destiny’s Child, En Vogue. This is most apparent in songs like “Busy Boy,” which could double as an updated “Bug A Boo” for 2020. Just as they assert themselves throughout the album through their messages, the ladies took much more control behind the scenes. We see them being much more real and relatable in their themes of love, sex, drunken nights, loneliness, and other 20-something problems. Throughout the album, the production, vocals, and songwriting all work in beautiful harmony, each helping draw attention to another layer of gorgeous and effortless-sounding artistry. They prove that just their presence can take the most basic of songs (I see you, “Catch Up”) and turn it into something special through the way they sync up. While the album may not be in the same vein of their contemporaries, Chloe X Halle are in a league of their own – they fulfill all of our traditional R&B fantasies. Given their artistic trajectory, I’m excited to see how they will continue to build and grow as artists under the mentorship of the one and only Yoncé.

Standout tracks include: Forgive Me, Do It, Baby Girl, Tipsy, Ungodly Hour, Busy Boy, Overwhelmed, Lonely, Don’t Make It Harder On Me, and ROYL.

No. 19: Good News – Megan Thee Stallion

Megan Thee Stallion has come a long way since dedicating last summer to the “Hot Girl” and dedicating a whole “Summer” to her and the “baddest” people in her group last year. Oozing sex-positivity and empowerment anthems, Megan Thee Stallion dropped her latest Good News with the help of some of the biggest names in rap and R&B. Hitting on topics like violence against women (she was allegedly shot by a walking Napoleonic complex if I’d ever seen one Torey Lanez; see “Shots Fired”), sex (literally a song called “Intercourse”), being a confident and unapologetic woman (“Circles,” “Savage (Remix)”), celebrating herself fully (“Body”), and the caliber of men who meet her own standards (“Freaky Girls”), Megan raps about the issues pertinent to her experiences as a Black woman in America. And she does it with ease. It’s this confidence that permeates throughout her music and the way she carries herself that makes her such a joy to listen to. As a rapper, she remains a wordsmith who knows how to effectively devastate anyone in her sights. And her allusions to pop culture allow her to connect with her audience even more. It’s no wonder Megan continues to accumulate the accolades – she’s only just started, but she continues to show promise as someone who will use her talent to further the plight of others. In a year where all of us have gone through it, especially Black women on the receiving end of violence, Good News comes as a welcome distraction and celebration of what makes one amazing. Here’s to spreading Good News to the masses in a year that could really use it.

Standout tracks include: Shots Fired, Circles, Cry Baby, Do It On The Top, Sugar Baby, Movie, Freaky Girls, Body, Work That, Go Crazy, Don’t Rock Me To Sleep, Outside, Savage (Beyoncé Remix), Girls In The Hood, and Don’t Stop.

No. 18: SAWAYAMA – Rina Sawayama

From the moment Rina Sawayama released the lead single “STFU!,” she made it clear that she was someone who commands presence just by existing. Chock-full of her experiences growing up as a Japanese-Brit, Rina writes about what she knows – her identity and experiences – over the very music that shaped her – late ’90s and early ’00s nu-metal, Max Martin-produced teen-pop, Timbaland-produced R&B, and the beginnings of the dance-pop movement. It’s through this lens that we see Rina pull these influences to create a hodgepodge of musical genius that, while it truly is all over the place, really just works. It’s like she was able to capture a screenshot of this era and reproduce it as a full-length album. Whether it’s about microaggressions she experiences as a Japanese-Brit on “STFU!,” the female/femininity empowerment anthem “Comme Des Garçons,” or critiques on capitalism on “XS,” there is no topic that Rina doesn’t avoid. And when paired with Rina’s unique voice, it helps position the album as a rallying cry for Millenials and Gen Z’ers who are truly trying to make the world a better place. The interesting part to all of this is that Rina truly did nothing but upcycle that which we all grew up with – by taking what once was gold, she was able to distill it down to what made that era truly so special, but to soundtrack the very causes that shape our current existence. It’s ingenious. It’s MAXIMAL. It’s jolting. It’s Rina freaking Sawayama.

Standout tracks include: LUCID, We Out Here, Comme Des Garçons (Original AND the Brabo Remix), Bad Friend (Original AND the Dream Wife Remix), Dynasty, XS, STFU!, Akasaka Sad, Paradisin’, Love Me 4 Me, F**k This World, Who’s Gonna Save U Now, Tokyo Love Hotel, and Snakeskin.

No. 17: Bubba – KAYTRANADA

Slick, funky, and trance-like, KAYTRANADA, or Louis Celestin, managed to release Bubba, one of the most exciting electronic LPs in the last 375 days, at the close of 2019. Consistent throughout the album is a pulsing backbeat that paces the action, allowing the listener to indulge in various facets of electronic, house, R&B, afrobeat, hip-hop, and funk that all sound uniquely Louis. They contain all of the elements to soundtrack not just any regular night out, but that single life-altering experience – that one night where elation reigns supreme. As a result of Kaytra’s prowess, the songs indulge in these genres while dropping seamlessly into others through each transition. Thematically, Kaytra focuses on his own fame, loneliness, love, and being othered, which may be a result of him revealing his queer identity back in 2016. And while these themes are well-rounded and certain adjacent tracks may work well enough when placed together, but when concentrating on the lyrical content, there are shifts in content that, while they ultimately work, just are not as seamless. This is most apparent in the raw honesty of love present in “What You Need” that then gets traded for the lustful nature of “Vex Oh” within the span of five minutes. But given that the album is probably best consumed while on any amount of substances (and PURE JOY can count for those of us who enjoy a nice sober night out), it’s an issue that would most probably be glossed over. And with a near-perfect run of 17 tracks, Kaytra raises the bar for DJ-helmed projects.

Standout tracks include: 2 The Music, Go DJ, Gray Area, Puff Lah, 10%, Need It, Taste, Oh No, What You Need, Vex Oh, Scared To Death, Freefall, Culture, and The Worst In Me.

No. 16: Birds of Prey: The Album (Soundtrack)

Putting together a soundtrack to one of the most anticipated female-led anti-hero films of the year may have been a daunting task, but DC and the team at Warner Bros. really got their acts together for this one. Chock-full of moments that transport the listener through various genres, it all simply works to paint a picture of dissociation and juxta-cohesion that one can only get when psychoanalyzing the film’s protagonist Harley Quinn. The Birds of Prey Soundtrack, through the voices of prominent females who are killing the game, takes the listener on a journey that mimics the disjointed storytelling Quinn herself utilizes throughout the film. At a little more than 40 minutes, listeners are privy to Quinn’s self-assurance, dalliances with danger, and a multitude of emotions. Combining the sass and attitude of prominent chart-toppers like Doja Cat, Megan Thee Stallion, and Saweetie with the emotional punches of songstresses Maisie Peters, Lauren Jauregui, and Charlotte Lawrence, this album has everything one could ask for. Especially when considering the plethora of emotions so many of us have been feeling during this pandemic. Just as Harley Quinn’s own patience and experiences are tested in the film, we see snippets of that innocence, badassery, desire to remain afloat, and the dive into the crazy that ultimately defined not only Quinn’s life but our very own existence in 2020.

Standout tracks include: Experiment On Me (by Halsey), Bad Memory (by K. Flay), Boss B*tch (by Doja Cat), Diamonds (by Megan Thee Stallion and Normani), Smile (by Maisie Peters), Joke’s On You (by Charlotte Lawrence), Lonely Gun (by Cyn), Sway With Me (by Saweetie and GALXARA), and I’m Gonna Love You (by Summer Walker).

No. 15: The Album – Teyana Taylor

After releasing her last studio album KTSE in 2018, Teyana Taylor wanted to make sure she had much more creative control over her releases. Queue The Album, her 23-song 2020 release that she was able to build out in a way that worked for her. The album itself is broken into five “studios:” A for Love, L for Sexuality, B for Self-worth, U for Vulnerability, and M for Triumph. And while the topics may be segmented, they work well within the context of this fun album. On The Album, we see a more confident Teyana delving deep into who she is, giving more of herself than previously seen. We see her take chances, reworking classics like “Next Lifetime” by the incomparable Erykah Badu in “Lowkey,” bringing back the Timbaland productions reminiscent of his late ’90s work with Aaliyah on the Missy Elliott-assisted “Boomin,” and celebrating Black culture at a time when we truly need that in our lives on “We Got Love.” There’s a certain ease and confidence Teyana brings to each track – even on a 23-track album, there is nary a filler track in-sight. It seems that taking creative control did Teyana well. She comes correct in a way I truly haven’t seen since the golden era of Janet Jackson (think Janet., The Velvet Rope, and All For You). Not only is the quality on-point, but Teyana was able to release something that was so unapologetically Black, especially on a date that was so important to the Black American experience (Juneteenth). Teyana tells her authentic story here – in all its glory. And that’s what makes this Album one of the great releases this year.

Standout tracks include: Come Back To Me, Wake Up Love, Lowkey, Let’s Build, 1800-One-Night, Morning, Boomin, 69, Killa, Bad, Wrong Bitch, Shoot It Up, Bare Wit Me, Concrete, Still, Ever Ever, Try Again, Friends, How You Want It?, Made It, and We Got Love.

No. 14: YHLQMDLG – Bad Bunny

One of the freshest faces in reggaeton, Bad Bunny reached a new level of cultural relevance when he dropped YHLQMDLG (Yo Hago Lo Que Me Da La Gana), which essentially translates to “I Do What I Want.” With its No. 2 debut, it became the highest-charting all-Spanish album on the Billboard 200 (a record he then broke with his latest release El Ultimo Tour Del Mundo). It’s with YHLQMDLG that Bad Bunny attempts to create an inclusive and fun environment for all who enjoy the reggaeton genre. Not only does he try to redefine the genre for 2020, but he also takes on issues of historical misogyny and homophobia that tend to be a mainstay of the genre itself (the marvelous video for “Yo Perreo Sola” does an amazing job of addressing this head-on). The thing is, Bad Bunny, arguably one of the biggest breakout stars in the world in 2020, pulls off this feat while creating something dripping with swag, attitude, and coolness. And he does it all so effortlessly. Whether it’s the ever-changing samples of “Safaera” or the straight beat of “La Difícil,” Bad Bunny crafts a feel-good album that helps not only to bring the reggaeton genre into today’s era, but also cements his status as a leading man with a conviction for equality in a genre where flaunting one’s toxic masculinity tends to be rewarded. It’s a party you’ll never want to end – it’s just a shame we haven’t been able to use it to soundtrack late-night get-togethers this year (thanks, COVID-19). But the best part is that post-vaccinations and for years to come, this LP will still remain hugely influential and relevant, having its day amongst friends.

Standout tracks include: Si Veo A Tu Mamá, La Difícil, Pero Ya No, La Santa, Yo Perreo Sola, Bichiyal, Soliá, La Zona, Qué Malo, Vete, Ignorantes, A Tu Merced, Una Vez, Safaera, Hablamos Mañana, and .

No. 13: Fine Line – Harry Styles

“I know that you’re scared because hearts get broken.”

There’s something so… enchanting about Mr. Harry Styles. I’ll admit that his previous album seemed to be a standard pop release – it didn’t really do much for me. But it wasn’t until I met Harry at a Grammys MusicCares event in 2018 that I truly became a forever fan. Story time: I had been running back and forth trying to get my performers ready to go on-stage, and Harry had seen me working the whole day. The one time I paused and looked over to the stage, Harry happened to be pacing back and forth practicing what we would say when it was his turn to present several minutes later. I just paused for a second – I wanted to really take him in and see what all the fuss was about. It was at this moment that he looked up from his notes to make intense eye contact with me. Everything just stood still. His eyes consumed me almost immediately, and I probably looked like a deer in headlights tbh. He smiled big, told me that he had watched me take care of [REDACTED] and that I was doing such a great job. I was floored – and it was in that moment that I understood why Harry had so many people invested in his very presence. I resolved that I’d be Team Harry regardless of the quality of his music. Because he truly does “Treat People With Kindness.”

And now onto the review. Thankfully, Fine Line, actually is every damn thing. An exploration of the beginnings and endings of new relationships – and all of the things that can happen in-between, Fine Line follows Styles’ own journey of self-discovery visually (the music video for “Lights Up” and “Watermelon Sugar” hint at Styles’ own bi/pansexuality). As for auditorily, Styles emulates some of the greats of pop and rock, including David Bowie, Fleetwood Mac, and Joni Mitchell. There are even shades of folk and indie rock that build upon the explorations he made in his self-titled debut album that show a more comprehensive understanding of the genres (“Cherry,” “To Be So Lonely,” and “Canyon Moon”). But in his songwriting, we see a man who still balances that fine line of baring his soul and creating something that others can connect with. As a result, we get an album that, for all intents and purposes, is a gorgeous work of art that hits on themes of mental health, celebrating sexuality, embodying nontoxic masculinity traits, but doesn’t tell us much more about Styles as a person than what we learn through the press. It makes sense that he’d be guarded given the tabloid fascination that exists with his life, but it may also be indicative of something else: maybe he’s still trying to figure out who he truly is. And until then, we will keep getting records that simply glimpse into Styles’ beautiful soul but may never truly provide the full picture. And that is totally okay, because when the quality of the record is this high (see my favorites of all-time “Adore You” – which my future partner has to be able to sing to me on-request – and “Sunflower Vol. 6” – which I honestly just want Harry to sing to me dressed as a damn sunflower. Please do it for me, Harry!), some mystery as to the gorgeous man behind the art is something we’ll have to get used to.

Standout tracks include: Golden, Watermelon Sugar, Adore You, Lights Up, Cherry, Falling, To Be So Lonely, She, Sunflower Vol. 6, Canyon Moon, and Fine Line.

No. 12: MAGDALENE – FKA twigs

I don’t know whether to consider this art or music – it’s just that hauntingly beautiful. To say I’m in awe of FKA twigs’ latest release MAGDALENE would be an understatement. And yes, I’m aware that it was released in November of 2019, but I didn’t actually sit down with it until this year, and I’m grateful I did. The album came about through the destruction of FKA twigs’ life as she knew it due to a terrible, no-good breakup with my least favorite vampire/Hufflepuff. It was from such lows that she was able to create something so tragic and moving. Something so full of raw emotion. Every single moment on MAGDALENE sounds delicate, as if not giving it your full attention will somehow make it all come crashing down. It personifies the shakiness that embodied FKA in the aftermath of her own tragedy. Which is why in a year like 2020, when the pandemic was able to drive so many of us to our lowest, an album MAGDALENE works as a blueprint to reclaiming some of our own joy and provide a basis for self-examination. The thing that is most on-brand for FKA and carries forward throughout the album is its general unpredictability – every single aspect of the album is deliberate, evoking a different emotional response from the listener. Throughout the listening experience, listeners can never get too comfortable with any part of the production – just as raw and grueling the songwriting is, the production amplifies this uncertainty in a way that pushes the work further. And it’s through these ominous, dark twists and turns of the album that the listener is taken on a journey of FKA reclaiming all that was stripped from her: her sexuality, her femininity, her freedom in her choices. And in a year where many of us are reconciling our actual versus perceived identities from the safety of our quarantine bunkers homes, MAGDALENE can help us also reach pinnacles of self-actualization, pushing us to greatness on the other side of this tumultuous year.

Standout tracks include: thousand eyes, home with you, sad day, holy terrain, mary magdalene, fallen alien, mirrored heart, and cellophane.

No. 11: Kid Krow – Conan Gray

Conan Gray, you truly are someone to watch in the future. There is something so raw and open about Conan Gray’s writing on Kid Krow. Kicking off the LP is the brutally honest “Comfort Crowd,” reflecting on his own loneliness and his desire to just be around someone else – no words, just presence. Conan utilizes the brashness and brutal honesty that shapes his generation to his advantage on this album. He explores teenage drama, excessive drinking that can lead to admissions of love when blacked out (“Wish You Were Sober”), psychotic exes of yesteryear (“Maniac”), game-playing of young love (“Checkmate”), gut-wrenching heartbreak (“The Cut That Always Bleeds”)… it’s all so raw and put on display in the most perfectly imperfect way. Side note, there are still fuccbois out here at the ripe age of 30, which makes his music so relatable. Conan embodies the writing prowess of Lorde, Billie Eilish, and Taylor Swift, some of the greatest songwriters of their generations. There’s an urgency to his songs that, when paired with his gorgeous writing, are able to tap into parts of your soul you forgot were there – you’ll be singing along about wanting to be “Heather” and her sweater-stealing ways. He sings about the very things that queer people tend to experience later on in life due to the borderline-stunted emotional growth we experience from developing romantically after our teenage years (like our heterosexual peers do during high school and college).

It’s him reliving his inclusive high school years that resonates with how so many of us experience our first loves and heartbreaks in the queer community at later ages. And that’s what makes his album so damn relatable, even if there is a ten-year gap between us. I’m having to navigate queer spaces with underdeveloped, immature “high schoolers” – the same types Conan writes about. And there’s just something so compelling about how he puts it all on the line. And to do so unapologetically… it’s so inspiring. This rawness, on-point production, and assuredness that Conan brings to the table is what makes Kid Krow such a stellar release. Here’s to a star in the making who will undoubtedly be changing the landscape of music in the future!

Standout tracks include: Comfort Crowd, Wish You Were Sober, Maniac, (Online Love), Checkmate, The Cut That Always Bleeds, Fight Or Flight, Affluenza, (Can We Be Friends), Heather, Little League, and The Story. YES, IT’S THE WHOLE ALBUM. And it’s very much deserved.

And that wraps up Nos. 30-11… Click here to view the TOP 10 ALBUMS OF THE YEAR!

Do you agree with these rankings so far? Comment below

In this labor of love, I give you the COMPLETE Top 70 Albums of 2020. It’s been a long and tedious journey to get here, but I did it – I reviewed 70 albums. I wrote nearly 20,000 words to describe the music that shaped my year – my quarantine and isolation. And it all culminated with this final posting. Music has always been especially important to me, and this year, I turned to it for solace, stability, and processing. I’m thankful for the musicians and artists whose work helped me and countless others cope. I do hope y’all enjoy the reviews. And before we jump into this FINAL iteration, here’s the first installment (Nos. 70-51), the second installment (Nos. 50-31), and the third installment (Nos. 30-11). And now, the moment you’ve been waiting for… The TOP 10!

No. 10: After Hours – The Weeknd

Emerging from the tatters of his uninspired My Dear Melancholy EP, The Weekend came back in a major way this year with hit after hit from his LP After Hours. His vision this time is fully realized, focusing on themes of overindulgence, self-loathing, and promiscuity that tend to litter his discography. But the difference between this and his previous efforts is just how EFFORTLESS the whole collection works together – it functions as a soundtrack to the demise of one of our beloved R&B crooners. As electronic his last full-length venture STARBOY was, Weeknd abandons those sounds for a more moody R&B, with snippets of nu-wave sprinkled in here and there. Weeknd comes off as someone who is sure of his process, and when you’re four albums in, it’s nice to see that you’re still differentiating your sound. There truly is no dull spot throughout the album – it’s a sonically-charged auditory masterpiece. After Hours‘ strength lies in its ability to span various genres in the most effective ways. And it doesn’t hurt that the radio hits truly are so unique compared to what else is being released these days. The Weeknd took a big risk with this release, and it paid off in droves.

Standout tracks include: Alone Again, Too Late, Hardest To Love, Scared To Live, Snowchild, Escape From LA, Heartless, Faith, Blinding Lights, In Your Eyes (Album AND Doja Cat Remix), Save Your Tears, After Hours, Until I Bleed Out, Nothing Compares, Missed You, and Final Lullaby.

No. 9: how i’m feeling now – Charli XCX

“I like I like everything about you.” – “Claws.“

In the first several months of the pandemic, before the novelty of being locked up in prisons of our own design wore off, Charli XCX bestowed upon us the quarantine masterpiece known cheekily as how i’m feeling now. The album followed her most polished LP to-date (2019’s Charli), and it served as a return to her experimental artistry. From the naked reverbs to the raw instrumentals, Charlotte voices the jumble of emotions that summed up so many of our experiences those first six weeks of quarantine. The album functions as a trip down memory lane – discussions of love, betrayal, distance, isolation, and the one constant: anxiety of not being sure of where you’ll ultimately end up. It’s an exploration of the bombast, the highs and lows of quarantine, and the blessings that one may have in their lives. It’s the inevitable restart that so many of us were feeling, but put to music.

At nearly 40 minutes, the album is reminiscent of Charli’s mixtapes, but in the best ways. Through the collaboration process with fans and producers scattered throughout the world, Charli sounds refreshed and sure of herself, even as the world she knows falls apart around her. This feeling is prevalent throughout the production, as seen most clearly in songs like “visions,” “pink diamond,” and “anthems.” But it’s the romanticism of songs like “claws” and “forever” that truly make this album worthy of the countless replays. At the end of the day, the disjointed beats and honest lyrics combine to create one of the most satisfying albums of the year.

Standout tracks include: pink diamond, forever, claws, 7 years, detonate, enemy, i finally understand, c2.0, party 4 u, anthems, and visions (YES, it’s the whole album).

No. 8: Positions – Ariana Grande

From the same mind that brought us the flawless Christmas & Chill EP we now have Quarantine & Chill, or Positions. Utilizing minimal production and hitting on themes of isolation, sex, romance, healing, and self-reflection, we see Ariana journey through her own self-discoveries courtesy of having to finally sit still. On first listen, I found Positions to be relatively monotonous, blending, and in the same vein as her previous releases thank u, next and Sweetener. But with that understanding, I gave the record a second chance and realized it’s the gift that keeps giving – each listen provides more depth than initially understood. It’s true – the biggest production moments are on the “Boyfriend”-esque title track – otherwise, the “magic” is in the details – the lyrics, the voice control, the emotion, and those strings! It’s a laid-back affair, which, in a year when there happened to be so much going on around us, it was nice to have some Ariana to fall back on. Gone are the big pop songs (see “Break Free,” “Side To Side,” and “Into You”) – the closest we get is “motive,” which still pales in comparison RE production bells and whistles. Instead, we get the most authentic version of Ariana: on the couch, ponytail shed, sweats, dogs running about, and cuddling on the couch with her (now) fiancé.

Whether it’s the hauntingly beautiful collaboration “safety net” or the low-fi chill of her bae running his hands through her “hair,” we see Ariana take chances in love once again (“obvious” and “west side”), appreciate her new beau (“pov”), deal with heavy topics of trauma head-on (“off the table”), assert herself (“shut up”), and just have some consensual, X-rated fun (“34+35” and “nasty”). It’s in this sweet spot of revealing her deep-seated issues over recycled beats and muted flourishes that we can make sense of what she ultimately tries to do – these traumas and experiences aren’t unique to her. And as she confronts hers publicly in less than 45 minutes, so many of us have continued to deal with our own, magnified due to the pandemic. And that’s why this album, with all its love/sex/chill/reflection, is quintessential 2020.

Standout tracks include: shut up, 34+35, motive, just like magic, off the table, six thirty, safety net, my hair, nasty, west side, love language, positions, obvious, and pov (YES, it’s the whole album).

No. 7: Chromatica – Lady GaGa

Lady GaGa’s “therapy pop” record Chromatica managed to drop just as people started to become even more restless during government-recommended isolation protocols. Juxtaposing the upbeat, positive production with themes of mental health, depression, loneliness, relationship woes, the negative aspects of fame, and PTSD, GaGa challenges listeners to dance their frustrations away. From the sweeping crescendoes of “Chromatica I,” we transition into the otherworldly “Alice,” a song that jolts the listener and makes them understand that while they may not be in Wonderland, they definitely are not on Earth for the next 45 minutes.

The album itself is broken into different stages, with orchestral suites bookending each part of the journey. With “Chromatica I,” we experience frustrations (“Alice”), desperations (“Stupid Love” – song review here), heartbreak (“Rain On Me” – song review here), and a desire to shed that which plagues us (“Free Woman” and “Fun Tonight”). From here, “Chromatica II” swells FLAWLESSLY into “911,” where GaGa sounds almost medicated, unable to really deal with her emotions and the trauma around her. The album then forges through the various forms of GaGa’s own traumas: trying to fit into what the image of what others want (“Plastic Doll”), her hardened, untrusting nature (“Sour Candy” and “Enigma”), and a “Replay”-ing of various traumas – including sexual assault and forms of abuse – she’s detailed in songs past. And finally, we hit “Chromatica III,” with its definitive, urgent call to arms, that transitions into the music that details her healing journey (“Sine From Above,” “1000 Doves,” and “Babylon”). Two immediate standouts when I initially heard the album were “Alice” and “Sour Candy,” the latter of which features international group BLACKPINK. With “Sour Candy,” BLACKPINK and GaGa interweave Korean and English lyrics around a Maya Jane Coles sample (the deep house treasure “What They Say”), focusing on double entendres, unapologetic confidence, and sexuality galore. It’s dark, moody, pulsing, and you literally can’t not get up and dance when it comes on. And it’s the one song my friends unanimously agree reminds them of me.

All in all, GaGa did the near-impossible: she saved our sanity and summers when she decided to drop Chromatica in May. A blueprint for how GaGa attacked and dealt with her own traumas while so many of us were confronted with our own… it was perfect timing. As she and Ariana belt on “Rain On Me:” “I’d rather be dry, but at least I’m alive” – Chromatica is a celebration of life. And while that life may be far from perfect, every second alive makes our continued survival in the face of trauma all worth it.

Standout tracks include: Alice, Stupid Love (Original and Vitaclub Mix), Rain On Me, Free Woman, Fun Tonight, Chromatica II + 911, Plastic Doll, Sour Candy, Enigma, 1000 Doves, Babylon, and Love Me Right.

No. 6: In A Dream EP – Troye Sivan

A culmination of the many things floating in Troye Sivan’s head in the aftermath of his recent split with model Jacob Binexman, In A Dream follows his own reconciliation in the world around him.

In A Dream is a journey – removing yourself from the relationship, talking it out and breaking up, and then the inevitable sadness that envelops you. From there, you cut loose, meet someone on Grindr in a respectable place, realize that you still hadn’t fully processed how you feel, run into people from your past who remind you that you’re amazing. And then finally let go. It’s a fever dream that kicks off with “Take Yourself Home” – our very own anthem for taking time to surround ourselves with what truly matters, releasing ourselves from the pettiness and things that don’t quench our soul. On “Easy,” Troye recounts the discussion that probably led to the dissolution of his relationship. It captures the awkwardness, desperation, and brutal honesty that comes in conversations like this. “could cry just thinkin about you” is the epitome of sadboipop – it’s so raw, emotional, and short. From this point, we see Troye engage in various coping mechanisms, including through the most sonically-charged song on the EP “STUD.” We see Troye fully embracing his submissiveness, reasoning out his own self-consciousness. The song transitions from an insular, introspective, borderline low-fi vibe to a dark, dirty club beat, similar to his hit single “MyMyMy” from Bloom. We hear Troye’s inner monologue – how he internally questions the intentions of the tall, muscular, no-nonsense STUD standing right in front of him – before, like a rush of poppers, the setting in front of Troye floods our own senses. The club beat fills the speakers, enveloping the listener and transporting us to that darkroom where Troye is about to get into some “trouble.”

Jolting us out of Troye’s darkest fantasies (which honestly make me wonder if incompatibility in this sense had some to do with the dissolution of their relationship – but that’s for him to divulge, not for me to assume), Troye reverts back to his lovable, romantic self once again on “10/10.” We follow this sweeter side of Troye into “Rager teenager!,” putting us front and center into a(n) Hallmark indie LGBTQ film storyline with our high school flame. All this wonder finally sets Troye back to the issue at-hand: his break-up. He finally has enough resolve to set healthy boundaries with the ex on the final track of this fever dream “IN A DREAM.” Now if only all of us had that same strength and willpower.

That’s the thing – this EP was just something he threw together between the end of 2019 and May of this year. On a whim. If this is any indication of the quality of his next LP will be, Troye has set the bar high. In A Dream stood out for its raw honesty – it’s Troye unfiltered, unpolished, and back to square one. His break-up brought him to the point of restarting, which has helped push him creatively. As dreamscapes provide a way for us to process our emotions and situations in safe spaces, In A Dream does that for Troye. He can process all of it – the actual relationship, the wished-for conversations, and raunchy fantasies, the aftermath of it all. And all in under 20 minutes.

Standout tracks include: Take Yourself Home, Easy, could cry just thinkin about you, STUD, 10/10, Rager teenager!, and IN A DREAM (YES, it’s the whole EP).

No. 5: What’s Your Pleasure – Jessie Ware

As an artist, Jessie Ware continues to top herself with each release. And What’s Your Pleasure? is no different. Moving away from 2017’s Glasshouse, an LP confronting the fragility of the domestic family-based life she had built for herself, Jessie focuses on two of her favorite pastimes: sex and dancing. Building off her 2018 one-off release “Overtime,” she moves even further into reverential disco and soul. We see her much more at-ease, having fun and creating magic that reverberates through the speakers. There’s a singular pulse throughout the whole album, and I’m not talking about the consistent four-on-the-floor beat. The lyrical content is every bit about dancing as it is intimacy – or, the epitome of disco-R&B. It’s a grown-up, mature record that reminds me of intimate get-togethers, dim lights, charcuterie boards, leather couches, and deep, rich reds. Because it’s disco, you’d expect the songs to come off as cheesy, but Jessie miraculously avoids these pitfalls through sleek productions.

The sound and soul of the album stays consistent throughout the near-hour-long experience – Jessie doesn’t try to genre-hop or get out of her sweet spot. And given all that Jessie has gone through since Glasshouse (having a second child and also launching a wildly-successful cooking podcast), it makes sense that she’s finally freeing herself of pandering to radio and recording executives. Instead, she’s creating music free of anxiety and expectations. Given the current state of her life, I wouldn’t be surprised if she wrote this album inadvertently as a soundtrack to her rekindling romance and the art of seduction for someone with whom she’s maintained a steady level of comfort. Soaking the songs in a sense of familiarity that can only come from utilizing a genre with a near-universal appeal (that also happens to be making a huge comeback), Jessie pulls off a record that traverses varying levels of love, lust, and desire – without having to embrace the full, (borderline) ugly truth of trying to maintain intimacy with a partner deep in “marital bliss” (see Lily Allen’s honest and fun “Close Your Eyes”).

While much of the album deals with similar themes throughout interchanging sex and dance, it’s the production, arrangement, and melodies that shape the listening experience the most. The album flows like a good soirée – lighter flourishes and more groove-oriented numbers with hints of what’s to come populate the first half of the LP. Seduction takes over around “Adore You,” when the tone of the album slows down, creating an almost hypnotic, sultry, trance-like effect. This is carried forward through the next two tracks (“In Your Eyes” and “Step Into My Life”), until we see an even more confident Jessie challenging her husband (most probably) to take the hint and “Read” her “Lips.” From here, all bets are off – the following two tracks ooze sex appeal and end with “une petite mort” (“Mirage” and the Bond-like seduction of “The Kill”). And of course, we relish in the aftermath of all the “dancing” with the gospel-esque soul of “Remember Where You Are.”

What’s Your Pleasure? is sophistication. It’s class. It’s flawless. It’s exhilarating. It’s a celebration of love and pleasure in the best way. And it’s these characteristics that make it a top 5 album of the year.

Standout tracks include: Spotlight, What’s Your Pleasure, Ooh La La, Soul Control, Save A Kiss, Adore You, In Your Eyes, Step Into My Life, Read My Lips, Mirage, The Kill, and Remember Where You Are (YES, it’s the whole album).

No. 4: Rare – Selena Gomez

“It took a few years to soak up the tears, but look at her now.” – “Look At Her Now.”

Five whole years. That’s the time Selena Gomez took between following up Revival with a proper LP. And the wait was honestly worth it. Rare takes the listener on a journey of self-discovery, -empowerment, -love, and -reflection. It’s an album that shows Selena taking a bird’s eye view approach to the many issues that have plagued her since she sang about keeping her “Hands” to herself: lupus complications, terminated relationships, anxiety, and much more. As she says on “Dance Again,” all the drama’s in remission, and it feels so good to dance again. It’s true, Selena had the world in her hands, but life happened and she dealt with it how she knew best. She took her time with her traumas, examining them, understanding them, befriending them, and ultimately letting them go.

Rare is a celebration of someone who knows who she is in this moment. Of owning who she is. Proclaiming how “Rare” she is. Selena knows what she brings to the table, how she has all of them wrapped around finger like a “Ring.” And just as her songwriting gives a little wink and slight insight into the traumas she’s experienced, she surrounds herself with simple rich, production – never overshadowing her lyricism or her lower voice register. There’s a sweet simplicity to her music – it’s subdued and varied, allowing the listener to pace themselves while diving into the album. There honestly are no songs that sound out of place or could be considered “filler,” but the one song that truly solidified my love for the album was “Vulnerable.”

“If I show you all my demons, and we dive into the deep end, would we crash and burn like every time before?”

With a mid-tempo, four-on-the-floor disco beat, Selena asks her potential suitor if he’s willing to take all of her: her emotions, actions, her weaknesses. It’s a sentiment I’m truly familiar with, and I’ve seen time and again how important it is to get these answers before getting in too deep with someone who may not be able to love you the way you need. There’s something so transitory about Selena’s music, and it’s what makes Rare such a cohesive and cathartic listening experience. Like she says on “Fun,” Rare truly is just what the doctor ordered. You were well worth the wait, Selena!

Standout tracks include: Boyfriend, Lose You To Love Me, Rare, Souvenir, Look At Her Now, She, Vulnerable, Dance Again, Ring, A Sweeter Place, People You Know, Cut You Off, Let Me Get Me, Fun, Feel Me (2020 Version), Bad Liar, Fetish, It Ain’t Me, and Wolves.

No. 3: DISCO – Kylie Minogue

Kylie did the most surprising thing ever – she created an album that takes a genre she has contributed to over the years (see “Spinning Around,” “Your Disco Needs You,” and so many more) and revamped it in a way that sounds authentically disco while inexplicably remaining modern at the same time. Coming off of her modern Brokeback Mountain on the dancefloor wet dream country-pop foray Golden, Kylie revisited a genre she’s covertly kept alive over the years. But, like so many of her fans, she’s loud and proud about her disco roots on this LP. Taking inspiration from Earth, Wind & Fire, Chic, Giorgio Moroder, Donna Summer, Diana Ross, and so many more, Kylie crafted a euphoric experience chock-full of irresistible hooks, champagne glasses, and glitter.

Developed (for the most part) during the pandemic, DISCO was created with one objective in mind: to uplift the masses while remaining in isolation. It’s pure escapism from start to finish. Lyrically, Kylie plays it safe – she writes about love, relationships, and the dancefloor, or things that exist in positive states throughout this “Infinite Discoverse” she has crafted. And that’s the thing – from the first piano riff on “Magic,” the listener is transported to Infinite Discoverse, where the party continues to rage, the dancefloor is populated with all your Instacrushes ready to groove down with you, and the disco ball continues to reflect the positivity Kylie supplies. The four-on-the-floor is STRONG on this album, and my hips (and honestly my calf muscles too) are especially thankful. It’s dance music – a self-assured “Real Groove” – that’ll have you Saturday Night Fevering all throughout your living room. It’s Kylie tempting us to throw caution to the wind (“Miss A Thing”) and live for more than just the weekend (“Monday Blues”) – which, what truly is “the weekend” when you’ve been under lockdown since March?

She has us falling back in love with falling in love again on “Supernova,” followed by the incomparable “Say Something” (see review here) and the ABBA-informed/“Voulez-Vous”-inspired “Last Chance.” It’s the ode to the dancefloor “I Love It” that truly keeps the disco party going, even when Kylie wants to keep the party going just a little bit longer (“Where Does The DJ Go?”). She soundtracks the nights out that just never were, but in a way that provides joy and hope for what can be (instead of for what we inevitably missed out on this year). She remains the fun, party Kylie throughout the LP, even when she has the chance to give in to seduction on songs like “Dance Floor Darling.” It’s like she’s the one in charge of the party, and she’s placing our collective happiness above her own pleasure – she’s the ultimate wingwoman for healthier, more positive pastures. It’s Kylie taking the collectivistic approach that society has had to embody throughout the COVID-19 outbreak!

Ending it with the saccharine, positive message to her fans, she “Celebrates” life, her fans, and the ones who have been top of mind throughout the year. DISCO is the uplifting LP that we needed in November as newer strains of the virus started to proliferate and many people’s restlessness had them ready to throw caution to the wind. Through her subtle celebrations of life and lyrics focusing on spreading positivity, care, and joy, Kylie may have unassumingly helped fuel us through the darkest turn of this pandemic. And that’s such a collectivistic, Kylie thing to do.

Standout tracks include: Magic, Miss A Thing, Real Groove, Monday Blues, Supernova, Say Something, Last Chance, I Love It, Where Does The DJ Go?, Dance Floor Darling, Celebrate You, Fine Wine, Hey Lonely, and Spotlight.

No. 2: folklore – Taylor Swift

There’s a certain swagger Taylor Swift embodies on “the 1” that carries throughout this 17-track surprise album folklore. It’s the return to form, back to basics, the songwriter’s journey if you will. The thing is, this sound on folklore is not necessarily anything new for Swift – just look back at her Civil Wars collaboration “Safe & Sound” from 2012. Gone is the Taylor whose calculated artistry has her considering the consequences of a song’s inclusion on an album. Instead, we have someone who has returned to the artistry of the music – it’s about developing a full-fledged album, not about how it will sound on the radio. And it’s what helps Taylor tap even further into that creative process. Side note: that’s not to say that her previous efforts are not extraordinary. On the contrary, they are the best representations of the types of albums they are supposed to be – big tent releases with stadium tours and all – just as Folklore is the best representation of what it is: a songwriter trapped in isolation during a pandemic with the understanding that traditional touring and radio won’t factor into the development process.

While there are hints of autobiographical content similar to that which us Swifties live to consume (“My Tears Richochet”), the album hinges on the stripped back instrumentation, pacing, and rich storytelling. Imagery moves the album forward – whether it’s a folded up “cardigan” that reminds someone of a past love or the “invisible string” that has always tethered together two lovers, Taylor employs the very definition of folklore – the art of passing down tradition and culture orally. In that sense, Taylor passes down the stories of the American dream: love, standing up for oneself, the art of “trying,” the destruction and rebuilding of celebrity. Chock-full of witty, cutting lyrics that have already been subject to wild examination beyond belief, folklore pushes Taylor to tell her interpretations of others’ stories.

“A string that pulled me out of all the wrong arms right into the dive bar, something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire…” – “invisible string.”

Whether it’s honoring the struggles of our COVID-19 first responders (“epiphany”), acknowledging the complications associated with her own celebrity status and its weight on her partners (“peace”), or even making sense of how hard it can be to just try in the aftermath of trauma (“this is me trying”), Taylor continues to dive deep into the things she’s focused on during the pandemic in the cleverest of ways. She takes on her staple themes of break-ups and romantic entanglements (“exile” and the “cardigan”/“august”/“betty” triad) with a clarity and sharpness that are more easily discernible due to the stripped-back production. “Exile” in particular hearkens back to the cold assassin “All Too Well” from Red. This is Taylor focusing on the parts of the album process that made the public initially fall in love with her – yes the sold-out tours, productions, etc. are great, but it all comes back to her impeccable writing and production skills.

Folklore is an updated version of American tradition – one told from a female’s perspective. That deals with issues pertinent to the (white, suburban) female experience. As is the case with any Swift album, the hype surrounding the songs – dissecting and attributing the stories behind the songs – is a given for any Swift release. But it’s both a blessing and a curse. The songs themselves have the ability to connect with audiences outside of their intended behind the scenes stories, but to do so, the hype has to die down. And that process has been much lengthier this time around – I blame people having so much more free time due to the pandemic! So yes, it becomes a curse because the novelty of discerning her lyrics hasn’t worn off yet, not allowing many listeners the chance to fully immerse themselves into the narratives Taylor has expertly crafted. But maybe by next year we’ll be able to attribute our own experiences to the songs for both folklore and evermore. Until then, we are stuck with the oral traditions and meanings written by “the 1” Ms. Swift. And that is honestly not a bad place to be.

Standout tracks include: the 1, cardigan (I prefer the cabin in candlelight version but both are gorgeous), the last great american dynasty, exile, my tears ricochet, mirrorball, seven, august, this is me trying, illicit affairs, invisible string, mad woman, epiphany, betty, peace, hoax, and the lakes (YES, it’s the whole album).

No. 1: Future Nostalgia – Dua Lipa

In a year where isolation and introspection were top of mind, Dua Lipa delivered Future Nostalgia, the one album that helped so many of us soundtrack these self-reflections. Diving into the nostalgic sounds of our childhoods (including disco, ‘70s and ‘80s pop, and old-school R&B), Dua created the soundtrack to the pandemic just as so many of us started to settle into the routines that would dominate our 2020.

“I know you ain’t used to a female alpha.” – “Future Nostalgia.”

From the first synth of the title and opening track, Future Nostalgia shows us that Dua Lipa isn’t here to play. She battles sexism through female empowerment, provides us with more break-up anthems we didn’t know we needed, and crafts some of the most perfect party tunes that littered our Spotify/Apple Music playlists. She embraces herself wholeheartedly, and then jumps right into asserting her newfound confidence. Ever the “Rule”-maker, Dua continues to be direct on “Don’t Start Now” with her ex-lover, cautioning him from going out if he can’t fathom her moving on, and brutally honest on the Prince-inspired “Cool,” where she moves onto her next conquest with the plucky courage of the strings that move the song along. She shows us versatility with the dark but titillating “Physical” and full-on party fare of “Levitating;” it’s Dua developing feelings for the new guy. From here, Dua starts realizing she wants more from this otherworldly romance. “Pretty Please” has her pleading with her lover, stripped of the heavy production work to emphasize her desires. She progresses to full-on Donna Summer “I Feel Love” moments on “Hallucinate,” and then reflecting on the goodness of the relationship in front of her in context of her previous failed one (“Love Again”). It’s from here that we see Dua question her own decision-making and give us the iconic line just in time for our self-imposed quarantines: “I should’ve stayed at home, cuz I was doing better alone” (“Break My Heart”). It’s a classic INXS-“Need You Tonight” sample to drive home the fact that we can be weak for the fuccbois that lead us (and several others simultaneously) on; that maybe this time it’ll be different (but are they every really different?). And finally, Dua accepts him for who he is – great sex, poor communication (“Good In Bed“). Is a relationship based on mind-blowing sex worth it in the end? Part of me says yes (it better DAMN GOOD sex) but I know ultimately a fully-fledged relationship is so much more than a fulfillment of our “Physical” needs. And Dua knows this as well. She finishes off the album with the tragically beautiful “Boys Will Be Boys,” detailing the heartbreaking struggles of women, like gendered violence, toxic masculinity, sexual harassment.

Dua does the unthinkable on Future Nostalgia – she releases a career-defining record unassumingly. It’s her very own Fever by Kylie Minogue – the album that showed the world that Kylie was so much more than a string of top 10 hits from the ‘80s and early ’90s. In that same vein, Dua proves that she is so much more than just the “New Rules” girl with Future Nostalgia. She took what could have been a terrible year for all of us and used it to her advantage, revamping her album rollout and taking the time to adapt to the times. She continued to inject life into an album through projects like STUDIO 2054, releasing songs that will inevitably end up on a SUPER Deluxe version of the album next year (“Un Dia” and the hypnotic and sultry “Fever”). She allowed the quality and cohesion of her art speak louder than her, and the general public listened. Here’s hoping that Dua can continue to raise her profile and become the badass diva we all know she can be.

Standout tracks include: Future Nostalgia, Don’t Start Now, Cool, Physical, Levitating (Original, Blessed Madonna Remix w/ Madonna & Missy Elliott, and the DaBaby Versions), Pretty Please, Hallucinate, Love Again, Break My Heart, Good In Bed, Boys Will Be Boys, and Fever.

Thank you all for joining me on this journey! After suffering some setbacks at the end of this year, I wanted to take on something mammoth to show myself I still had the ability to own a gargantuan task like this. And I’m grateful for the support I felt from friends and family throughout this process. I hope that y’all truly enjoyed the reviews, learned something new, and decided to give a new artist a chance. Here’s hoping that 2021 will be churning some even more amazing music.

Do you agree with these rankings? Comment below